What would your mom (or dad) do if...?

Scream at me for ages, kick me out of the house and disown me and never talk to me ever again.

If you got a criminal record?

It might depend on the crime. Something small like a traffic violation or whatever, I'd just get bitched at. Anything more than that, I'd probably get an ear chewed right off. But, unless it was like someone in the family that I killed or something, I think they'd both support me in court or whatever, then disown me afterwards.

...if you announced that you were dropping out of your ivy-league college to become a play boy bunny?

they would kill me. or expect something else. maybe they won't care 'Coz I would never get into an ivy-league college

if you told them you are going to be a mom/dad?

Freak out and tell me about how Jesus would be ~soooo~ disappointed in me, and then they would probably call their pastor and have him 'lay hands on me and pray'. :P
It's good motivation not to get pregnant.

Same?

She would be shocked and ask me all sorts of questions like "since when did I lose my virginity" and "who the father is" and so on and so forth.

If you ran away?

Mom would: Wait for me to come back and sit on the porch, smoking a cigarette. She knows I'm not that far away.
Dad would: He's probably part of the reason I ran in the first place. He wouldn't care.
(Yeah, it's happened)

Dyed their hair Purple in the middle of the night?

Mum: ...really? Purple? COOL. :D
Other Mum: PURPLE!?!?!? OHGODOHGOD. -flail

you came home with your septum pierced?

Tell me it looks awful and to take it out.

If you started headbanging in front of her to no music?

Give me a "WTF" look but ignore me.

If you had an affair with your teacher?

(that would first imply that there was a hot teacher) Kick me out, I'm 18 anyway

Walk in on you fucking your boyfriend or girlfriend

I would be dead on a hundred different levels.
...Maybe not that extreme, but I'd definitely never be able to be alone with them ever again. Especially if it was my mum. Oh lord.

Same?

She would probably get a shock, curse from the shock and then leave the room very quickly.

Same again?

She would hit the roof, force me to break up with him, and never talk to me ever again, and if she did, it would be really snappy and rudely.

If you became the most wanted criminal in the world?

My mum would give me the biggest disappointed look in the history of disappointed looks and tell me to put some clothes on and tell him to eff off.

If you got a tattoo?

Ask if she can have a look at it and ask if it hurt to get it done.

If you started talking to yourself?

I already do and she just laughs at me. Or gets annoyed if she hears me talking and thinks its to her when in reality it's just me talking out loud to myself.

If you bought a puppy?

make me sell it i think.

if you got pregnant/got somebody pregnant?

Be disapointed and ask me why didn't I learn from my sister's mistakes. Then she would be supportive and help me try and decide what to do.

If you had a fist fight in public?

My dad would probably watch.

If you got pregnant?

Tell me that she wished I had've waited until I got a job and saved up some money for the baby first.

Same?