it's hurting you, but it's killing me

Emma moved her hand to the back of Zacky's neck, brushing her fingers through his hair. She loved this Zacky, the one who treated her like a girlfriend. "I love you, Zack," she whispered against his lips.

---

"You wanna know why I drink?" Matt asked. He was starting to get mad now, he always did when he talked about this. "Because when I'm drunk I don't have to watch my brothers die. I don't have to remember how terrified I was that I wasn't gonna come home to you."

[Sorry i was busy today XD]

Zacky smiled, "I love you too." He said as he kissed her. He put his arm around her and pulled her into a tight hug. He smiled as he peppered her face with kisses.

---

Lennox frowned, "then get help dammit!" She yelled at him. "I get it. You are hurting every day and i can't do anything to help you. I watch you sit around and suffer!" She snapped. "You don't understand what it's like to watch you be the shell of the person you once were. Please Matt just get some help." She said.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

"Zack, stop," Emma giggled. The sensation of his lips over her face tickled and she moved her face into the curve of his neck, leaning against him as he hugged her.

---

"Lennox, these people can't help me," Matt sighed. He felt like he was talking to a brick wall. She said she cared about him, why couldn't she just let him handle this the way he wanted to? He was so frustrated he almost wanted to cry. Or hit something.

[[that's okay, I was too XD]]

Zacky smiled, "What you know you like it." He said as he kissed her again. He placed his hand on her cheek and deepened the kiss. He moaned against her mouth as he pulled her into his lap.

---

Lennox frowned, "Then what will? Please tell me Matt. What can i do to help you?" She asked as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "You won't even let me near you anymore." She whispered.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

Emma squeaked when Zacky pulled her into his lap, not expecting him to feel frisky at all. And as much as she was enjoying the attention, she wasn't really much in the mood to fool around. But it wouldn't hurt to kiss him a little. And who knew, she might change her mind.

---

"Idunno," Matt slurred. He hated that he was making Lennox cry, but what was he supposed to do? He didn't want to drag her into the mess that honestly made him think about just ending it sometimes. Matt looked down at his feet, starting to sway. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

Zacky smiled as he placed his hand on her cheek and kissed her deeply. He smiled as he kissed along her neck. "I love you." He said as he held her body close to his.

---

Lennox wiped the tears from her eyes and then placed her hand on his cheek, "Hey...it's okay. We are going to figure this out. Just please do not shut me out Matt." She said as she kissed him softly.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

"I love you, too," Emma whispered. She closed her eyes and tilted her head to the side, giving Zacky a bit better access to her neck. She let out a contented sigh, gripping onto Zacky's upper arms to steady herself.

---

"M'trying not to," Matt mumbled. He carded a hand back through his hair, tugging at the short strands in frustration. "But it's just so much easier to k-keep it to myself."

Zacky smirked and kissed her deeply. He ran his hands up her shirt as he kissed her again. He laid her back on the couch and moved over her.

---

Lennox ran her fingers through his short hair. "Why don't we go lay down." She suggested. She led him upstairs. She got ready for bed then laid down with him.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

Emma had no idea where this Zacky was coming from; she couldn't remember the last time he'd wanted to sleep with her. But she hadn't been taking her pills the last few days, so she wasn't sure if this was a good idea or not.

---

Matt didn't really want to lay down, but he let Lennox drag him upstairs. He waited about twenty minutes, not even caring if she was asleep yet or not, and headed back downstairs, slipping out the back door and lighting up a cigarette.

Zacky smirked as he kissed her roughly. He kissed down her neck and started moving his hips against her. He smiled as he ran his fingers through her hair.

---

Lennox slept silently, holding onto her blanket as she slept. She woke up the next morning and sighed when she saw that the bed was empty.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

Emma sighed softly, enjoying the feeling of Zacky's fingers running through her hair. But as much as she was liking this, she wasn't sure she wanted to go any further, at least not right now. She'd have to stop Zacky when or if he got to that point.

---

Matt awoke with a jerk when his lighter fell from his hand and clattered down on the porch. He must've actually fallen asleep outside. It couldn't have been for more than a few hours though, because Matt could still feel the exhaustion deep in his bones. With a groan, he picked up his lighter and stood up, deciding to go inside and see if Lennox was awake yet.

Zacky pulled her shirt off then kissed down her body and started to unbutton her jeans. He smirked as he kissed along her stomach. He looked up at her as he started to pull her jeans off.

----

Lennox stood in the kitchen, cutting up fruit for her breakfast. She looked over as Matt walked in. Lennox looked back at what she was doing not sayin anything. She was tired of making the first move with him anymore.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

"Zack, s-stop," Emma muttered. She moved her hands down to rest on top of his, stopping him as he pulled her jeans off. "I'm not really in the mood for this right now, I'm sorry." Emma knew Zacky was probably going to be mad or frustrated and so she steeled herself for cruel words.

---

"Morning," Matt grunted, walking over to the fridge. He groaned as he bent down to pull out the package of bacon; spending all night on the porch definitely wasn't good for his back. Moving over to the stove, Matt put a skillet on the burner and placed a few strips of bacon into it. "Sleep well?" he asked Lennox.

Zacky glared at her, "Are you fucking kidding me?" He snapped as he pulled away from her. "Why do you always do this?" He asked. He shook his head and looked away from her. He was trying not to be pissed off.

---

Lennox looked at him, "Morning." She said. She watched him for a moment, "I slept okay." She said as she sat at the table and began to eat.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

"I'm sorry," Emma whispered again. She reached for her shirt and slipped it back on, looking over at Zacky. She actually felt guilty that she'd stopped him, even though she knew she shouldn't.

---

"That's good," Matt replied. He could sense the tension in the room, although he wasn't sure why she was mad at him now. She should've figured out by now that he hardly slept and he didn't like to lay in bed, tossing and turning.

Zacky frowned and shoved her back onto the couch. "Sleep here. It's not like you want me anyway." He snapped. He got up and walked out of the living room. He went to his room and sighed.

----

Lennox sat at the table and stared down at her food. She felt like crying but she was fighting it. She wiped a tear away then continued to eat.

@ ZackyEffingVengeance

Emma was so frustrated she almost wanted to scream. It just seemed like she could never do anything right when it came to Zacky. He was right, she was stupid. She thought about following him upstairs, but knew that would only invite more screaming and arguing.

---

Matt watched Lennox as she ate. She was obviously upset, but Matt's ability to know how to comfort her had fled, stripped from along with his sanity during his last deployment. "Are you going to talk to me or just ignore me all morning?" Matt asked.