Confess on My Wayward Son

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The sound of a close friend snoring on our couch will forever by my favorite.

I feel like I'm walking up to a phase of great and extraordinary things in my life. The foundation is being set for me and there is nothing but up coming very, very soon.

I'm really uncertain about being back together with you, but you know what, if you love me like you say you do, you've got to prove it.

Haha... I have mixed feelings about seeing your FB status but at the same time it made me want to start shit with you just because I felt hurt but I didn't. What I almost said wouldn't have been me even though it would have summoned up my feelings completely.

my gender identity changes in sexual situations but I don't know who to talk about it with.

Caught feelings kinda bad on Saturday, despite also thinking he and his fiance are super cute together.
Kinda relieved that he's gonna be leaving this week, just sucks that we didn't get to hang out much before that. *shrugs*

thanks for the stress and headache... I'll get back to you tomorrow when i'm feeling a bit better. Or maybe i should just block you now...?

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Yep, I hit a low! Haha.... fml

I hate hate HATE my roommate. He is pretentious, sexist, and makes fun of people who are disabled. Wtf. I don't think I can stand one more day with him, let alone a whole year. Thankfully my boyfriend is here to stop me from beating him up or something.

Lately I'm in a constant state of anxiety. Like I can't shake this uneasy feeling like something is gonna happen, something big and I don't know what it is. My heartbeats are going so fast even though I'm basically just laying down. I know this can't be healthy but I don't know what else to do. I'm always shaking and I just don't feel good all the time. Sometimes I just want to hide under my desk at the office or just disappear from everyone just so I can have a room to breathe.

Please don't tell me we're here again. I can't break his heart like this a second time. I'm probably worrying about nothing and I just have to wait, just like the last time I had these suspicions, but I can't help it. I'm hoping it's just the stress getting to my head.

I hate "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery" like fuck off no it isn't. Especially in the creative industry, you do something that you're really proud of and then people lift it from you. Chances are you don't even get credit for it. In situations like that imitation is the cheap way out because people aren't creative enough to think of something of their own. Here I'd like to insert the upside down smiling emoji by Apple. Also like maybe 3 snake emojis.

Just remembered that uni classmates will pull this shit too after you tell them an idea. YOUR GOOD GRADE IS FROM MY GOOD IDEA

My period is supposed to start tomorrow and I really hope it doesn't come. I know my chances of being pregnant are slim, but God, I want it.

Sometimes I think people tend to care more about losing weight than how someone loses that weight. Like... I told a friend of mine that just last week I lost almost 4kg. And she looked at me like she was in awe and was like "that's great!"

She completely disregarded the fact that just before I told her about the weight loss, I was telling her about how I'm always in the state of hunger because I didn't have time for lunch because my work is piling up and by the time I got home from the office, I was too tired for dinner.

Oh no, ignore the obviously unhealthy lifestyle and just focus on the fact that I managed to shed that extra 4kg. Cool.

I can't wait for Elon Musk to colonise Mars finally so I can leave this shitty planet and this shitty species behind. I'm growing so embittered towards the world and how it's being run. I used to be so passionate about Politics but I no longer care what side of the spectrum my leaders sit on, because everyone has the potential to be a cunt regardless of right or left leaning tendencies. And it's not just the politicians. Almost everyone I meet or talk to or associate with in any way, whether it's face to face or I'm just reading their posts, almost everyone cares about one thing and one thing alone: themselves.

I understand that a degree of selfishness is necessary to survive this cruel place, sometimes you have to say no or not consider someone else in order to further your own life. I understand that focusing on all the misery and poverty and death in the world would make anyone crazy. But surely there has to be some shits given about the feelings of others? Surely a little self sacrifice should be present in everyone's lives to keep them humble?

Maybe I'm over thinking everything. It just feels like there's so much more hatred in the world, like we all feel we're entitled to the good life and we kick off when we don't get it. No one values hard work, no one values patience, no one values hope and joy and that feeling of accomplishment when you finally get to where you want to be after years of trying. No one values themselves or anyone else. Other humans are just pawns to decorate and improve our own lives. No one listens.

I'm well aware that there are exceptions, and maybe it's just the globalisation of it all, the internet providing swathes of information and looks into other people lives. Maybe you only see the negatives when only negatives are in front of you. It just feels like, in the years between my childhood and my adulthood, the world has turned on itself. How are we all supposed to live in peace and harmony, with everyone mattering and working together in their mutually agreed roles to better the human race, when there is so much pointless hate?

Sorry Mibba. I've been low for a few days and I've finally worked out why.

Yeah, okay, Mibba lag. Make me look like an idiot.

Three days after the wedding and I'm sitting on the couch between my grandmother and husband watching Elvis movies and eating cherry tomatoes, coffee's on the side table.

@ papa emeritus.
Literally me. In situation and conversational partner.

I had my breakfast and lunch with him today. I'm so happy.

I need to stop getting tattooed... Naaaah