Never Letting Go

It had been just over an hour since they'd arrive and she was getting bored, she'd talked with a couple of people and drank some hot chocolate that had been offered to her till someone offered to put some rum in it; she didn't drink. The effects of alcohol weren't great to her, she much preferred to be sober. "Hey, do you want any food?" she asked Kihyun leaning up to talk in his ear since it was so loud.

Rayan smiled a little as she sat with Wonho, leaning against him. "Its cold," She murmured, sipping her apple cider. "What do you want to do later?" She asked curiously.

---

Kihyun shook his head and sighed, watching Rayan with Wonho. "No, not yet. Wait, I'll be back," He said, standing to grab his jacket and walking it over to Rayan. "Hey, can you talk for a bit?" He asked her.

"I don't know if that's a good idea," She said looking at him and then looking past him to Charlotte.

Charlotte was going to say something but he was already gone, she plopped down on the log in front of the fire then looked at her hands. She didn't get it, what did Rayan have that she didn't? Why couldn't anyone like her? Guys generally didn't talk to her, with the exception of Jin but he only spoke to her cause he wanted to redo her entire wardrobe. She sipped her drink, wondering if he'd every come back.

---

He looked at him then buried his face into Rayan's neck as he sighed contently, he was warm right now despite the biting wind. He didn't have anything to say to him, he'd let him crash and burn.

She rubbed Wonhos arm and sighed. "Right now isn't the best time, besides I don't know there's much for us to even talk about," She said softly.

Kihyun shrugged, looking at Wonho. "I wanted to just talk, you were the one I came to for problems, and I need someone to speak to. Just ignore him, he'll be fine until you get back," He said, gesturing away. "Come on, it won't take long."

Rayan sighed a little, looking at him. He had really hurt her, but she had nothing she really wanted to say. She saw Charlotte sitting over on her own and looked at Kihyun. "Oh, Charlottes here, what is she doing over there? I have to send her the stuff she asked for earlier. Charlotte!"

Charlotte lifted her head when she heard her name then stood up and made her way over to Rayan, hey," she smiled weekly.'

---

Wonho smiled a little as she got nearer to them, "You can talk to her fine right here, besides if she doesn't want to thats the end of it," he said as he lifted his head to speak.

Rayan smiled a little and pulled out her phone. "I need your number to send you the info I told you about earlier at lunch," She said, opening it and handing it to her. She turned to Kihyun and sighed. "Can't it wait?"

Kihyun sighed and nodded before pulling out the jacket he had brought. "It can, but I brought this for you, I figured you would miss it." He said, smiling a little because she knew what the jacket was.

Rayan smiled as soon as she saw it, but wasn't sure how to react. The jacket was hers, and she loved the jacket. But it reminded her of Kihyun and she knew she wouldn't want to give the jacket up. But the relation to Kihyun made it problematic.

Charlotte didn't even want to be there anymore, she was tied of it already and it'd only been a week since winter break had ended. She had hoped this year would be her year, "alright yeah," she said as she gave her her number then smiled a little, "and my email is just my name charlottegg@gmail.com," she said to her smiling a little.

---

Wonho looked at the jacket then furrowed his brow a little then made sure to press a gently kiss to Rayan's cheek and neck, "Do you want it?" he asked her softly as he kept his arms around her as he let her lean on him.

Rayan smiled a little and took her phone back before looking at the jacket. She would be lying if she said she didn't want it, even before Kihyun it was one of her favorites. But she knew it reminded her of him, and that's why she hesitated. "I...uh," She said, looking at the jacket in her lap.

---

Kihyun smiled smugly, happy because he knew that now he might still have a fighting chance. "Don't worry about it, I know you. It's yours," He smiled at Rayan and then at Wonho. "We can talk later, Rayan." He said with a tiny grin before turning to Charlotte. "If you're ready to go, we can leave. Ive done what I wanted to," He said with a small smile.

"You've done what you came here to do?" Charlotte said as she looked at him, "I thought we came here to have fun, to visit with my best friend who I haven't seen in weeks? You know I'm really tired of being your chaufer," Charlotte's voice was cracking, and her hands were shaking with how angry she was at the moment.

"You came here to mark your territory - look at her, "she said pointing to Rayan. "She is over you, you're holding on and I have been trying so HARD to be your supporting friend but you don't even see me as that. Just as someone who can get you from point at to point Rayan, we used to be such good friends - we used to actually eat lunch together but instead you'd rather use me to see her," she whispered then pulled her gloves out of her pockets then wiped her eyes as she choked back a sob that threatened to spill out.

---

He sighed a little, "It's okay, you can ignore him, keep the jacket if you want to or we can get rid of it later," he offered with a understanding smile, he was about to speak again when looked up seeing that Charlotte had obviously had enough.

Rayan watched quietly, before looking down at the jacket. She didn't want to get rid of it, and that in itself was a problem, she knew that. She was clear in her feelings for Wonho, he was what she wanted. It was just erasing the memories that came with the jacket and Kihyun. She turned and smiled a little, leaning against Wonho but looking at the jacket. She picked it up and set it aside, turning to look at the fire before she turned to see Charlotte who had started yelling at Kihyun.

---

Kihyun stared at her in slight confusion. "Wh.. why are you so angry? I thought I made it clear I wanted to fight, and I wanted your help?" He asked her, taken aback by her reaction.

"I was wrong for that, and I shouldn't have been so one track on this. I haven't been spending time with you like I should and I am sorry. But you're the only person I can go to for this, you know I don't have a car right now. You're the only person I trust to help me get her back..." He said, shrugging a little at her. "If you want to stay, we'll stay. If you don't we'll go. I know I need to be a better friend to you but I need you here for me too, I can't get her back without your help. I cant fight without you."

"I just don't understand," she whispered as she wiped at her eyes then shook her head a little, what was wrong with her? why couldn't he want her this badly? No one wanted her this badly, did it say something about her as a person? Probably. She buried herself in school work so much, never opened up to anyone, it was hard for them to get close to her. "She doesn't love you like she used to, and I know it's not what you want to hear; but I'm your friend so I HAVE to be honest with you - she...she likes him it's so obvious to everyone but you," she murmured softly said as she looked at him. Her chest hurt from not crying like she wanted to her, throat felt like it was going to squeeze the life out of her.

---

Wonho kissed her cheek, "Do you want smores?" he asked as he pulled out a bag that had been handed to him, "Everything we could need,"

"Actually... I'm thinking maybe we should go," She said turning away from Charlotte and Kihyun. "We can roast marshmallows in the fireplace at my house, I have all we need for smores, and we can bring that too. Plus...Riley might enjoy it before it's time for him to go to bed." She smiled a little, grabbing her bag. It gave her a lot to think about, the last thing she wanted to do was be mean to Kihyun, she didn't like being mean. She worked really hard to try to make sure that there was no reason for her to be mean to anyone. But Kihyun coming back was confusing her. Had he never broken up with her in the first place, they never would have broken up. But she never would have met Wonho either. It was difficult to think about.

---

Kihyun shrugged. "I don't need you to understand, I just want you to be there for me. You saw how she reacted with the jacket, if she was really over me she would have told me to keep it. But there's a chance for me, I know it. I just have to fight for it. But I can't do that alone. I need help, I need you to do it." He said to her. "If I see theres no chance, then I'll stop. But that right there, that just now gave me hope that there is a chance. I just need to fight for it."

Letting out a deep breath then nodded a little as she sniffled and wiped her eyes, "Lets just go," she whispered and walked away from him, fishing her keys out of her purse. She wanted to go home, where she could sleep and cry without disturbance. "I moved did you know that? We needed more space since the twins wanted their own rooms; I don't even live on the same street as you anymore,"

---

He looked at her and furrowed his brow a little ,"Ah, alright," he said to her as he smiled a little, "Maybe we can watch a movie too?" he offered as he looked at her and smiled. "I bet her'd like that new animated movie that came out,"

Rayan stood and grabbed her bag, throwing the jacket over it and putting the strap over her arm. "Yeah, he's been wanting to see it. If we can find it online, I'm sure it'll make him really happy. Plus, he likes you a lot too so smores, movies, and getting to see his 'big friend' will probably make him extremely happy." She smiled a little, reaching for his hand as they walked toward her car. Her mind was racing and she really just wanted to get out of there. She already knew people would be talking about it and she didn't want to think about it.

---

He followed her to the car, climbing in and buckling his seatbelt. "I know you did. I came by one day, but the house was empty. I never got a chance to see your new house, because I had been really busy. But I came over and you weren't there. But I knew you were still in school." He told her, crossing his arms to warm up in the car since it hadn't heated yet. "You should have told me before you moved, I would have come by."

She started the car and looked at him, "I did try," she murmured softly as she looked at her hands then sighed, "but you were always busy with Rayan," she told him shrugging a little as she turned on the heater then looked back at him. "I guess, part of me worries if you two get back together you'll have no use for me, and I'll be alone again," she murmured gently then looked out at the bonfire from the car. "we used to be so close, I've just not been important enough fro anyone lately, should be used to it,"

---

He nodded a little,"I.. do you want him back?" he asked as he looked at her with a furrowed brow as they got closer to her car, "I know you have history with him, but he hurt you so bad I'd never want to see you like that again,"

She was silent for a bit, opening her car and getting inside, starting the car but not moving. "No. I don't want him back. I have you, and I want to be and am happy with you. But I'm not immune to the fact that we do have history, and that I did really like him. I never would have left if we didn't break up, but in a way, despite the tears, I'm happy we did." She said, looking at him and smiling. "I wouldn't have you if we hadn't. So no, I don't want him back, but I am also not as immune as I would like to be and I think he knows that." She said softly. "But I want you more, and I have no intentions on leaving you."

---

He shook his head. "It won't be like that this time. I want you to be there like you used to, and I think you and Rayan could be great friends. I just want that Wonho guy out of the picture, and then everything can go back to normal," He said softly. "You're important to me, and I'm sorry if I haven't been showing it."

She nodded a little and began to drive him home, "I know," she murmured softly as she looked at the road then sighed as she pulled up next to his house,"Kihyun, you're my best friend," she said to him softly as she looked at him then went to touch his hand but retracted. It was too touchy for them to be just friends, "please just...becareful,"

---

He nodded a little as he looked at her, "Good," he smiled a little as he looked at her, "I'd feel really lost here without you, I guess I'll have to show him you're mine,"

"I have no intentions on leaving you. Besides, after seeing how Charlotte looks at him, I would feel as if I were intruding even if I wanted him back. I just wish I could ignore him better. But you don't need to worry," She said as she drove. "I'm yours just as much as you are mine. Despite all of this, I've noticed the way girls here look at you. I want them to know you're mine and all they can do is look, because I'm not letting go." She said, putting the car in reverse and driving toward her house.

---

He nodded a little and smiled, looking at her briefly before climbing out of the car. "I know. I know what I'm doing," He said assuredly, walking towards his house. "I'll call you later or something." He said, waving and shutting the door behind him.

Charlotte groaned she had gotten a B- on her english exam - she felt like a failure she had studied every day for hours; and it hadn't paid off. She slammed her locker shut then pouted a little as she looked at the paper, she hated vocabulary - it was her weakness. "Can't believe this," she muttered softly, "Mom is going to kill me,"

Rayan had walked through the halls during break, trying to see if she could find Charlotte's locker. She really had never seen Charlotte outside of classes, so she had no idea where she hung out, or if she even had a locker on the same wing Rayan did. So Rayan went through all of the upperclass lockerways, trying to see if she could find her on a day when Kihyun wasn't around.

When she came up to her, Charlotte was facing away from her, and talking to herself. "Who's going to kill you?" She asked curiously, hoping she didn't scare her. She moved so she faced her, wondering how she would react to her. "I wanted to talk... if you aren't busy." She smiled a little, moving out of the way of her locker.