Anorexia.

I wanted to share a sort of success story with you guys.

For the last four years I've been battling with hating my body, hating my appearance and every little thing that I could hate about my body, I did. I forced myself to throw up for about two and a half of the four years, throughout the entire time I would stop eating for periods of time, I would moniter my calorie intake profusely at times, constantly weigh myself, grab at my stomach, do crunches and push ups and everything late at night or very early morning.

I got myself so deep into the hole of eating issues that it honestly looked like I was never going to get out. I never thought that I could never look at food again and not immediately start calculating calories and what I'd have to do to get rid of it.

But now, I think I'm better. Or, at least, on the road to being better. I've started eating healthily, I've stopped counting calories on the most part, I exercise daily and I just eat the right things. If I feel like chocolate, I'll eat chocolate. If I feel like Macca's, I'll eat it. That kind of stuff, but just...in moderation.

I'm not saying it's easy. Some days, I have a bad and it gets really hard. Sometimes I slip up and relapse. But on the whole, I'm getting better. I'm not sure why exactly but...I'm kinda proud of myself. I believe in all of you guys so much. I read your stories and it makes me sad because I know exactly how it feels, how trapped and shameful you can feel every goddamn day. But I believe you guys are all strong. You can do it.

If anyone needs to talk, PM me. Please. You don't have do go through this alone. No one should ever have to.

I'm not quite sure what issue I may have.
I don't want to lose weight, I'm really happy with what I weigh (50kg), but I want to be anorexic, like, I want lose weight and I count calouries because I want to lose enough weight that people will think I'm anorexic and give me attention. I want people to look at me and "my god you're SO skinny"

I know that is is not right and I shouldn't want it, and I should go to someone for help, but it is just so hard saying it to myself

bush_cat:

I'm not quite sure what issue I may have.
I don't want to lose weight, I'm really happy with what I weigh (50kg), but I want to be anorexic, like, I want lose weight and I count calouries because I want to lose enough weight that people will think I'm anorexic and give me attention. I want people to look at me and "my god you're SO skinny"

I know that is is not right and I shouldn't want it, and I should go to someone for help, but it is just so hard saying it to myself

So you don't want to lose weight, but you want to lose enough weight so you look anorexic. I think you need to think about this some more, it doesn't make sense.

Also keep your health in mind.

veronika:

So you don't want to lose weight, but you want to lose enough weight so you look anorexic. I think you need to think about this some more, it doesn't make sense.

Also keep your health in mind.

Sorry I mustn't have explained it right. I do not think that I am overweight, but I want to lose weight to become anorexic. I couldn't care less about weight, I just want to be anorexic. It's every hard to explain sorry

bush_cat:

Sorry I mustn't have explained it right. I do not think that I am overweight, but I want to lose weight to become anorexic. I couldn't care less about weight, I just want to be anorexic. It's every hard to explain sorry

Why??
Eating disorders are hell.
Have you researched the effects on your body??
And even if you don't worry about your weight now, once you restrict your calorie intake you will become obsessed.
You should speak to someone about this, love. It's a little concerning.

@bush_cat

No, no, no, no, no. Please don't go down that road. Eating disorders...or even losing weight to look anorexic, it becomes more. It starts off as 'just a few kilos, then I'll be fine' and ends up with a few kilos becoming more and more and more. It's so hard to get out of. It starts controlling you, completely.

It's not good. It's scary. Talk to a friend or someone you trust. Seek some help, it doesn't matter if it's professional or not. Just get some help, before it gets too far. Or, even better, try and fix the problem causing you to feel inclined to do what you want to do.

You can do it.

Mia Bell.:

@bush_cat

No, no, no, no, no. Please don't go down that road. Eating disorders...or even losing weight to look anorexic, it becomes more. It starts off as 'just a few kilos, then I'll be fine' and ends up with a few kilos becoming more and more and more. It's so hard to get out of. It starts controlling you, completely.

It's not good. It's scary. Talk to a friend or someone you trust. Seek some help, it doesn't matter if it's professional or not. Just get some help, before it gets too far. Or, even better, try and fix the problem causing you to feel inclined to do what you want to do.

You can do it.

Yes. That's what I meant.
If you alter your body, you alter your brain. talk to someone, please!

Mia Bell.:

@bush_cat

No, no, no, no, no. Please don't go down that road. Eating disorders...or even losing weight to look anorexic, it becomes more. It starts off as 'just a few kilos, then I'll be fine' and ends up with a few kilos becoming more and more and more. It's so hard to get out of. It starts controlling you, completely.

It's not good. It's scary. Talk to a friend or someone you trust. Seek some help, it doesn't matter if it's professional or not. Just get some help, before it gets too far. Or, even better, try and fix the problem causing you to feel inclined to do what you want to do.

You can do it.

Yeah, i've been thinking about seeing a doctor about it, but it's so hard to tell myself to do it. But this is the first time I have talked about it, so it's a small step forward, but aleast it forward.
It hard because I know what I am doing is wrong, yet I still want to do it, it is almost like I have an obsession with anorexic

I went through a similar thing, except I had body issues as well. It's something that you will struggle with but it's not worth it. It will also lead to severe depression, if you do starve yourself, because the two often go hand in hand. By restricting your food, you aren't getting the necessary nutrients to keep your body functioning and this includes being happy. It's a huge can of worms but you can get out now. I didn't get out and the whole thing dragged on for years and years and is something I still struggle with sometimes now. For me, it involved many things including suicide attempts, hospitalisation and some other pretty horrific experiences (and even if that might sound dramatic and/or 'glamorous', it is not). It's also not something that you can just get away from. Eating disorders stay with you, one way or another, for a very long time. Physically (from things like severe health problems to infertility) and mentally.

You may also want to consider that this isn't necessarily the main issue, but a symptom for something else. My obsession took many incarnations, including wanting to be pretty and wanting to look/be ill so that someone would take pity on me/love me to wanting to look so ill that people would leave me alone.

Even if you find you can't talk to anyone right now. Remember that being healthy is better, prettier and cooler than being anorexic. If you ever want to talk, you know where I am. You can friend me if you want.

I've been having a lot of problems with eating at the moment but everything just feels like it's out of my control. I'm starting to get scared. I weigh around 50kg normally but lately I've dropped down to 45kg and people are starting to notice how thin I look.

I am constantly lying to my friends, family and boyfriend about how much/what I eat. I am completely incapable of eating in front of anyone or in public places. I'm hyper-obsessed with weight and I've started to realize how annoying I can be to those around me about it. I feel like I have to constantly reassure everyone around me that I'm skinny. God, I sound like such a shallow, concieted bitch.

Everything is getting so much harder now that I've started university because I'm by myself most of the time and I don't have anyone enforcing when I should eat. (I mean, at high school, they ring a bell and you take out your lunch box.). There have been days where I haven't eaten anything.

I don't know what to do. Sorry if this sounded disjointed and like a whiny teenager. It's just I'm getting pretty upset about it. The thought of food makes me feel physically nauseas.

Edit: I also haven't had my period in two months. I'm not sure if they're connected though because I've always had irregular ones. I've always been skinny...it's just my eating has never been this bad before. I'm so lost.

^ There should be a guidance place at your university. Maybe in the union? Some sort of support system where you can go and talk about your problems in a safe, confidential environment. That could be the next step. They'll give you options and show you your possibilities. Just remember that you're not alone and there are a lot of people around to help you.

Also, you don't sound like a whiny teenager. You sound scared, which is completely fair.

^ There is a free councilling service run by the student guild, I think I'm going to ask someone about it there. =/

Mia Bell.:

I wanted to share a sort of success story with you guys.

i'm glad you're getting through
this, katbb.

I interviewed a friend of mine about her battle with anorexia for a class.

God, it was very eye-opening. There were a lot of things about it I never knew.

I'm so happy that she's better.

To anyone who has had Bulimia and gotten over it; I'd really like it if you could message me and talk to me and help me through somethings. Thank you.

To anyone who has had Bulimia and gotten over it; I'd really like it if you could message me and talk to me and help me through somethings. Thank you.

My boyfriend and a few of my friends think I'm anorexic. I'm apparently showing most of the symptoms (Loss of menstrual periods {Mine only came this month from being drug incuded} abdominal pain, Lack of energy and weakness, feeling cold all the time, Restlessness and insomnia, Dizziness, fainting, and headaches and dry skin) but I'm not underweight, infact if i put on the tiniest bit of weight I will be said to be overweight. I have problems with eating, I don't get hungry and that leads me to faint because my body isn't telling me when to eat. My boyfriend is trying to get me to go to the doctors, but I don't see how that will help, I think it will just make the situation worse.

fingerprints.:

My boyfriend and a few of my friends think I'm anorexic. I'm apparently showing most of the symptoms (Loss of menstrual periods {Mine only came this month from being drug incuded} abdominal pain, Lack of energy and weakness, feeling cold all the time, Restlessness and insomnia, Dizziness, fainting, and headaches and dry skin) but I'm not underweight, infact if i put on the tiniest bit of weight I will be said to be overweight. I have problems with eating, I don't get hungry and that leads me to faint because my body isn't telling me when to eat. My boyfriend is trying to get me to go to the doctors, but I don't see how that will help, I think it will just make the situation worse.

Well, the criteria for diagnosing somebody with anorexia is body weight at least 15% under the healthy average for that person's height so you're not anorexic (and the low weight and implicit low-nutrients diet cause most of the other symptoms), however, loss of appetite, low energy, insomnia, etc are all symptoms of other diseases (namely depression and anxiety-related disorders) so it's definitely worth checking with your doctor. I read somewhere (I think Freud's daughter did some research on it) that it takes your body a couple of months in starvation mode to block out the sensation of hunger. So anorexia, at least in its initial stages, often doesn't imply a complete lack of the sensation of hunger, but a refusal from the sufferer's part to comply and feed themselves. There's also the possibility that since you've just finished school and especially if you've had exams to stress over in the last couple of months, your body is just tired and your doctor will give you some advice on how to improve the situation.
In short, there's really no way asking a doctor about it could make the situation worse and if it's serious enough to make your friends concerned you really should go get a general check up.

my friend is ana/mia.
and it killed me being the only one to know.
i tried to help her best i could.
but in truth, there's nothing anyone can do until that person realises they have a problem, that enough is enough, and seeks help themselves. Its no use trying to force someone to get better, or saying they need to, its when the realisation hits them that they understand and see what they're doing. Not just to themselves physically, but mentally, and also the people around them.
To be honest, she was at the point of being admitted to hospital.
She would also ring me in pain and say she was having extreme heart pain

i thought she would die.

but now she's in a loving relationship, she sees a councillor, and is slowly on the road to recovery, despite a few bumps in the road.

Please no one suffer alone. Talk to some one, any one. even if its just to get it off your chest. Then when YOU feel the time is right, ask for the help you need, and don't stop until you get it. Don't be afraid. If you relapse, its ok. its a learning curve. Just get back up and try again.
love always
x

wrong thread.