Self-Injury Ed and Support

a friend of mine used to burn and she was really open about it and it fucking sucked being her therapist instead of her friend.
i think this thread should be less about making friends with people who self harm and sharing stories (or at least the detailed ones that are so specific that they give out new ways to hurt yourself), and more about finding ways to stop self-injuring so obviously i posted some links

coping mechanisms
how to tell people you self-injure
self-help

I used to selh-harm. I still do sometimes. But I moved on to other things that could be considered worse or not depending on the person.

I was bad for it two years ago that i actually sat in class and scraped away layers of my skin.
and then last weekend, i got frusterated over this guy i like and well... it's still there... and the pathetic part is, i blamed my affectionate cat for the marks.

They're getting me professional help now.
They all assume I want to quit. I don't, to be honest, I don't encourage it, it's a
shit thing to have to do to yourself, but I feel like it is a part of who I am that I
am completely content with.
They're forcing me to stop. "When you want to, wait a while before you do, try
and distract yourself". But then when I do it's worse. My thigh is fucked up, my
boyfriend is coming over tomorrow and he's gonna be so pissed that I didn't
let him help me. I'm proper panicking right now. I want to cut my arm again, it
feels so much better than my leg, and I don't have to do it as much... fucking
summer and all it's short sleeved shirt glory :/
I'd do it now, tbh, but I'm too tired to. Oh well.

I have been self-harming since I was 7 years old, technically.

At age seven, I ripped skin off the bottoms of my feet... I used clippers after the bath and would continue until they bled and had big lacerates in them. (I recently found out that [at least] one of my sisters knew about this, but never stopped it. I am the youngest.)

At age nine, I started out punching myself, because I felt like I deserved it. I had numerous bruises. I guess the bruises/scrapes/cuts I recieved while skating weren't good enough, because they were not intentional.

At age ten I added nail scratching to the list. I would scratch my nails against my skin until they were completely red. Nobody ever noticed, because they thought mosquitos were really irritating.

At age eleven or twelve (The exact age escapes me...) I began ripping the skin of my palms with a safety pin (or any needle). I had little red marks all over my palms, you couldn't see any color besides that, and even on my fingers too...

At age twelve I began stabbing myself with a push-pin/thumb tac, and pushing needles into my skin to leave them there. Maybe that is why piercings don't hurt? It was when I lived in my Aunt's home. I stabbed my wrists repeatedly, as hard as I could. One of them bled so badly, I have a big blood stain on the comforter I still sleep on.

At age thirteen I started cutting. The first cut I made was at age twelve, if that counts, but at age thirteen, I really started. If I felt like there weren't enough, I would make more... At one time, I had 100 on each leg. That was the first time.

I am going to turn 16 on July 18.

Currently now, I bite the skin off my finger tips, until they bleed, I rip the skin off my feet, burn my feet under scolding water, and (sometimes) punch myself/other objects.

Honestly, I miss stabbing my wrist with the push-pin/thumb-tac, cutting..., ripping skin off my palms, and pushing needles into my skin... I miss it so much...

kaledrina.:

They're getting me professional help now.
They all assume I want to quit. I don't, to be honest, I don't encourage it, it's a
shit thing to have to do to yourself, but I feel like it is a part of who I am that I
am completely content with.
They're forcing me to stop. "When you want to, wait a while before you do, try
and distract yourself". But then when I do it's worse. My thigh is fucked up, my
boyfriend is coming over tomorrow and he's gonna be so pissed that I didn't
let him help me. I'm proper panicking right now. I want to cut my arm again, it
feels so much better than my leg, and I don't have to do it as much... fucking
summer and all it's short sleeved shirt glory :/
I'd do it now, tbh, but I'm too tired to. Oh well.

Professional help is probably best. I'm sure you have lots of support, dear.

---

I threw away my sharps after a relapse kinda thing.
I hope to stop completely.
No cutting, no bruising, no scratching.
I've been doing pretty well so far.
I hope I continue to do so. :)

I hoped they would ask me to change when I had a biopsy on my lower legs a few days ago. Maybe then they would see the scars on my thighs and get me some help.

I've been self-harming since the age of twelve.
It's not really a compulsive thing anymore though. I just do it every time I'm going through a rough period. I've spent so much money on concealers, foundations and powders to cover the marks.
I'm 16 and I've started doing it again. I promised to my close friend(who is the only person I've ever told) that I wouldn't do it anymore and he believes I stopped. I feel ashamed for lying to him, though I don't want to get him worried.
I know I should see a psychiatrist instead of taking out my problems on my body. Though I know the doctor will definitely tell my parents who are one of the roots of the problem. I guess this is why I also resort to binge-drinking, smoking and weed as another relief.
I've also been lying to my boyfriend about it. He knows. He started seeing just how severe the marks on my arms are when my bracelet broke on his bed. I blamed it on the cat, and now I've moved to mutilating my thigh.

I used to have a really bad self-harming problem last December/January, then sometime around early/mid February I decided to stop. A few months later, my mum saw my scars and I ended up telling her everything. I told her that I'd already stopped by myself, and she said that if I ever messed up and started again, I should tell her and she could help me.
So, just yesterday, I was feeling really really down, and so I stupidly started cutting again. On my hips this time, where no one would see. The thing is, I'm worried that if I don't tell my mum she'll be really upset if she ever finds out, but if I do tell her she'll probably be upset too, especially since the reason I was in a really shitty mood was because she had got drunk and started acting really weird.
I don't have anyone else I could speak to about it either, and I just don't know what the hell I'm supposed to do.

watercooler romance.:

I used to have a really bad self-harming problem last December/January, then sometime around early/mid February I decided to stop. A few months later, my mum saw my scars and I ended up telling her everything. I told her that I'd already stopped by myself, and she said that if I ever messed up and started again, I should tell her and she could help me.
So, just yesterday, I was feeling really really down, and so I stupidly started cutting again. On my hips this time, where no one would see. The thing is, I'm worried that if I don't tell my mum she'll be really upset if she ever finds out, but if I do tell her she'll probably be upset too, especially since the reason I was in a really shitty mood was because she had got drunk and started acting really weird.
I don't have anyone else I could speak to about it either, and I just don't know what the hell I'm supposed to do.

Tell her. Not only will she get you help, but maybe it will stop her from drinking/ getting drunk as well. You need to find help over this if you can't stop on your own.

Or, if you do want to stop on your own, you're already doing good. You've already managed to last a few months without cutting. Next time, try and last even longer. And if you do, try something else. Snapping a rubber band on your wrist, holding ice cubes in your hand or doing something else painful, but not permenant will help you to stop cutting. And if you do manage to stop for a longer period of time this time, reward yourself with something you really love (ice cream, chocolate, a trip to the spa, whatever). And just keep busy busy busy.

If you ever need to talk, PM me. I would love to help you if you want

I used to cut my arms, not my wrists with broken glass. I have a really low self-esteem, and I don't know why but I enjoy my pain. Seeing my blood, just reminded me Oh yeah I'm still alive!

Becky Starz .CTC:

I was bad for it two years ago that i actually sat in class and scraped away layers of my skin.
and then last weekend, i got frusterated over this guy i like and well... it's still there... and the pathetic part is, i blamed my affectionate cat for the marks.

I blame my cats as well. But the only time people ever see my marks (not scars - what I do doesn't scar properly) is when I have to swim at school, so I get away with it most of the time.

scratcHing now.
and tHanks to fucking degrassi, I Have a new idea.

^ Remember to use proper spelling/capitalization/punctuation/grammar on the boards.

i resort to binge drinking and smoking and weed because cutting myself became dull and didn't give me what i needed

but it's nonetheless just as worse as cutting or burning

I've got skin that scars veeryy easily, so I've got cuts on my stomach and wrist that are well over a year old. One's pushing two years, and they're never even very deep cuts.

I guess it has it's benefits because sometimes when I look at scars I already have I feel less bothered about cutting again, because I've already got a mark. Which is almost reassuring, I guess?

But then it's also shit because when I used to try and quit it'd be a constant reminder and I'd find them so ugly on my body.
I haven't cut for around 4 months now though, so it's going well.

i need to stop. I hate that I do it. But it feels soo good at times. I don't cry when I do it. I cry first then hurt myself. I've stopped crying when I do it, because then I throw up, which attracts too much attention. I've been hurting myself since i was at least 7. First picking at my skin, biting myself and hitting the walls. I hate myself. I'm not happy in my own skin. I started to scratch my skin, leaving marks and playing harmful games that would let me embrace the pain. i eventually got up to playing with fire and burning myself, which only turned into cutting. I've attempted suicide a quite a few times. I've been trying to stop. I really have. But i can't. I try to get help, I can't bring myself to admit that yes i have cut. that Yes i did it last night, the first week of this month, last month, in July, in March, and so on. I hate lying about the scars on my legs. I go from cutting my thighs to my tummy. The scars have faded from my tummy (well almost) because i used a shaving razor blade. The ones on my legs, i used a box cutter razor. I need help. I made a mistake yesterday by cutting inch long cuts on the side of my wrist. Sometimes i do feel as if no one cares, because when i look for help, there is no one there. I feel as if i'm screaming and no one can hear me. I feel as if the abuse is loud enough for people to "hear". However although I'm 18, I do not want my parents finding out that i still do it. They think I quit when I was 14. My therapist thinks i stopped 6 months ago. I just i don't know any more. I think I don't need it, until my wrists start to burn.

Does anyone else's wrists burn when they "need" to cut?

When I don't want to cut, I will try not to eat, so this way I still have some kind of control. I try not to hit walls, or bite myself other than my lip, because I do not want evidence. Which i know, cutting = scars. I don't want to die yet. It wouldn't bother me to if i did in my sleep, or got murdered, or got hit by a fast moving vehicle, but not by my self. I do not want to commit suicide. I know you guys don't care about me, you don't know me well enough to care, you don't know me at all. but i don't know. I needed to get it all out.

I sometimes do write on my arms... only it's stuff like murder me sweetly, or til my last breath.

i just wish i could stop. But it's an addiction.

I've been struggling with self harm for a year. I've tried getting help from school, my parents, and even my friends' parents. It isn't really helping. I refuse to let my family get involved again and hurt them that much. I can't really turn to anyone. Oh well, looks like something I'll have to deal with on my own.

I've given up on trying to stop cutting now.
I've decided that I'm going to keep on doing it, but I'm not going to let it take over my life and become an addiction like it did before.
And I'm not going to tell anyone about it this time.