mr. word vomit / Comments

nothing just chilling out trying to write and lately finding myself drawn more and more to your incredulous stories wish i was able to wright as interesting and amazingly. but I'll keep trying and posting stories, and i will keep reading your stories whenever i am on. I'll even re-read them 20 times if i can.. thanks for writing the amazing works of art

P.S. I added you on MSN! :D

PIC, Partners in Crime. :D
I'm such a dork.

Oooh, how was Art?
I love looking at your work on DA, it's really beautiful.
You better get straight on Gaia and reply to me and post in the Special rp, too! I command youuu! xD

Yeah, I joined this rp called Sober Again.
It's basically these teenagers in a rehab center. It's a pretty mediocre rp, there's only three of us and the other users only post small paragraphs but I'm kinda just trying to join rps that interest me and writing as much as I can so I can get back into writing.
http://www.gaiaonline.com/forum/barton-town/sober-again-accepting/t.52047541/ That's the link, if you wanna take a look.

I plan to write a one shot asap. :D
I have inspiration already. I've been listening to Pretty. Odd. all day and I just...it makes me so happy. It makes me want to write again.
Oh, yeah, I'm going on a 2 week cruise starting Saturday, so I'll have limited acess to the internet (I know, I'm pretty distraught too xD) but no doubt I'll spend alot of the time sitting on the ship, looking out at the sea and I'll get some inspiration. (:


Haha, am I?
I didn't think I was. xD
But yay, popularness! Haha.
I've never been into the whole popularity thing but as it turns out, I was kinda popular at high school, haha.
I was known as the really loud shouty kid that talked nonsense and skipped class or turned up drunk. xD
Great reputation there. :/

The past few months, I've actually been threatened to be diagnosed with an eating disorder and threatened to be taken to Alcoholic Anonymous. >.<
Despite that, things have been good! xD

Yeah, I just searched the article before I replied to your comment. xD
I read it but I can't listen to phonecall because it says it can't be viewed outside the US for copyright reasons. -.-
I can't believe that so many people just dropped the faith after the split/the coke picture. I mean, how can people say they love someone's music and ideals and band so much but as soon as one bad picture comes out, they just drop him completely!? Can't some people have a little faith in the kid?
I mean, he said in the article that all those girls were older than him.
So, yes, he may be of a legal age but that doesn't mean he's not a kid and it doesn't mean that getting peer pressured stops 'cos he's 21.
They probably wanted to take the picture with him and he kinda just got swept along in it.
I still believe in him. Because I know sometimes people fall and to get back up again, you need to be believed in.

Woah, sorry, had a bit of a rant there. xD
Sorry, haha.

PS. There's also a couple really great angry, masochistic songs on there >:D

Lj is something that takes some getting used to. But once you get it, you get it. If that makes sense.
http://lyrical-masque.livejournal.com/ <-- my lj. Feel free to stalk it <3
Do you have a facebook by any chance? Or yahoo messenger?

Ryan is a pretty controversial topic on lj as well. Fandom in general I guess. And I agree with you, as fans and just good human beings really we should be trying to get through to him. Whether or not he will listen to a bunch of teenagers is slightly doubtful, but we can at least try instead of just being passive about it. I think the apathy of others is part of the reason some people continue to do drugs. They figure no one cares enough to say anything, so they decide they shouldn't either. Not in all cases, but some. The one friend I’ve told this about who kind of understands thinks I should write a letter to him. At first I thought that was silly, or maybe I was just being shy, but it’s not such a bad idea. I just have no idea if I'd have the guts to go through with it.

God, the girls. Yeah, that seemed really fucked up. Both ends of it are fucked up, but the girls were definitely more in your face. I don’t think I even saw the coke for ten minutes. It was this really suggestive “aren’t I awesome I have all these girls around me” kind of statement, and that is just… sad. That he’d want to appear that way.

My family is something that this has been helping me to face, actually. I’m not going to give up, on him or my cousins. I’m just… trying to write my way through it I guess. I feel way better than I did, definitely less in shock.

I’ve kind of abandoned religion. A lot of it strikes me as hypocritical, and not just about the drug/alcohol thing. Like how some Christians will talk about how religion is a choice and then force their kids to get confirmed and shit, even if they don’t want to. What does that teach them? That it’s okay to lie about what you believe in if it makes your parents happy? It seems like a load of bullshit to me. I actually went through the stupid ceremony, and the words. God, I don’t even remember them but I’m pretty sure I lied to God, the entire congregation, and my family about believing what they believe and planning to stay in that church. Now, if there is a God, I’m fairly certain he doesn’t like being lied to. So… why?

No fireworks? That [i]sucks.[/i] I absolutely love fireworks. We can get away with a lot of illegal fireworks where we live, you just have to be careful. Never set more than one Roman Candle off every ten minutes, don’t go too crazy or too loud, etc.

I’ve heard a lot of the DMV people down here are assholes :/ But I’m sure I’ll manage. The one time my mom let me drive her car around a parking lot she kept yelling “watch out!” or something like it at me and I wasn’t even close to hitting anything. Parents can be the worst driving teachers, I think. They know you too well so they worry more about you crashing.

The new Green Day album is kick ass <3 Really amazing. Not sure if it’s as good as AI, but still pretty damn epic. 18 tracks (God, [i]eighteen tracks.[/i] Why don’t bands do that anymore?) of just… them trying to make some sense of the shitty state this country is in, and trying to figure life out as well. Uhm. 21 Guns is probably the best song ever. Viva la Gloria! is pretty awesome too. All of it really :)

Love ya,
~Kay

my summer has been fabulose how about yours? and you are more than amazing you are superfantabuloseexpealadocious lol :) and you are a magician with a pen and paper like it's super amazin :)

Bden and Ryry is one of the best things in the world, yuss! :D
As is you and me, PIC. xD

Nothing much is up, I'm quite bored.
I joined another RP on Gaia and I've been looking at others, so I have something to fill my time with. xD
Oooh, House is on TV tonight, I'm exited. :D
We should get all the details of our fairytale character RP sorted.
You need to reply to my comment on Gaia! xD
And post on the Special RP. :3

I just noticed the post below this mentions the Hatter. o.0

I hadn't the heart to tell him how much it hurt me, that he was leaving panic at the disco. But on the other hand, it must have been something that he was ready to do, otherwise it wasn't something he did. Other than that, I think he should do what he seems to be right, because, if he would listen to fans just to keep them happy he would lead a life he wasn't proud off. Placing himself last and stuff, so I'm glad he did what he wanted to do.

Thank you, about the Ryan Ross thing. In my eyes I'm just a normal Ryan Ross fan, I look up to him and feel along with him when stuff isn't working out the way he wants to, I just, feel like he's someone I can always look up to as a guide and role-model. The best thing about RyRo might be that he isn't perfect, he has flaws, which make him so much more real.

Haha, haven't your mother ever seen the extended versions? They are very cheap at the moment, because the LOTR hype is slowley fading away, untill the hobbit comes out of course.

and I have heard about M. Hatter, sad she had to leave.

O, and my name is Leonie. But people around her call me Ryan or Pyro. So which ever you prefer, I will be happy.

Haiii! <3

He fell in my eyes, and I wanted to reach towards him. But what can a silly fangirl like myself do? Not much, so I'll just sit here, waiting for him to get up again. And he is a true artist, so he will get back on his feet.

I've been doing good, watching loads of Lord Of The Rings extras, we have all the extended editions of the movies, with more then 5 hours of backstage footage each movie. So I've been pretty busy with that.

Other than that, really enjoying my summer vacation. Waiting for time of work and enjoying myself in te sun.

And, how is Mibba treating you, since you came back?

Thank you for the compliment on my signature. I however, have given up on hating Ryan Ross. Not that I hated him completely, just a disapointment hate I guess. But my love for that guy is so great that I will always forgive him, even if he screws up every human relationship he has ever started. I just don't know, he makes me feel good and even when he's done with Panic! at the disco I will follow his footsteps to see where it leads.

How are you, besides the panic troubles?

And it makes my day to hear your gratitude. I'm so glad that you look at it fom such a great perspective. And you also put it very elegently when you said that music doesnt give up on us. That idea has kept me alive to this day. I adore your writing and I want you to know I'm always free if you want someone to bounce ideas off of or want to just to takl 2 about anything. I remain a loyal follower =]

-Anna

Your welcome.
I’m glad to give comments like that.
And yes, despite the split, I will continue to support Panic!
(their half minute demo is quite nice to hear - I’ve been missing the AFYCSO type of music), and I will definitely keep an open mind for Ryan and Jon’s new music.

As for Ryan himself, all we can do is hope for the best, and not dwell too much on it, but as we’ve agreed, let the old Ryan live on in our hearts, heads, and literature.

I believe we’ve got it much easier than the people close to Ryan, because truthfully, the Ryan that I know so well is basically conceived from interviews and fan fictions, which I can always revert back to when times like these come along. His friends and relatives only have memories to rely on, while they watch the current Ryan slowly damage himself.

And I can see this comment is getting unhappier by each word, so I’m going to finish off with a good morning, and I hope you have a wonderful day.

:: more hugs, just cause i feel like it :: =)

Heh, ya, I had a couple of my friends confused when I changed names. And to be honest I use my lj a lot more than I use this. A lot, and I mean a lot, of the writing on here disappoints me. There too, but it's easier to ignore. I still like it here though, still have friends who haven't moved over somewhere else, so I stayed. I'm glad you're still here too. (Lol, I love how it sounds like I'm referring to an actual place.)

I tried to explain to a couple people in my real life how I've been feeling, mainly because they asked why I was feeling so shitty/moody but so far everyone's reaction has been "that's all that's bothering you? There's got to be something else. How could you feel let down by someone you hardly know?" Like it's nothing. That really frusterated me, kind of made me feel like I was foolish or something. But then I went on lj and a couple people reminded me of some things.

"Sure, it'd be easy to say we should be mature and strong and not be bothered by something this ‘insignificant’ when there are people in the world who are starving, or who have lost actual family members, etc. but that doesn't mean our pain isn't real. That doesn't mean we're not allowed to have it, or we're somehow ~lesser because we're hurt by this. Never, ever be ashamed of your emotions." I've been trying to remember that every time one of my friends looks at me like I'm crazy. It helps, a little.

Panic! I can deal with. Yeah, it will be different, and I was really shocked at first, but it’s their band, their decision, and if they feel they have to go their separate ways musically then fine. Panic! Without Ryan’s lyrics will be a little strange though. And Ryan’s lyrics without Brendon voice and… well, you get it.

I almost wish I hadn't seen that picture. Like you, I was angry at first. Then disappointed, disenchanted, you could say. And then. Then I remembered my family. And I cried. I'm pretty sure it's coke, or at least it really looks like it, there were lines set up and everything, but I guess... well, it doesn't necessarily mean that he was participating, even if it was in the picture. Hell, it could've been some elaborate scheme to get attention or look cool. Which is still upsetting and wrong, but I'd rather believe that than the alternative. And the [i]girls.[/i] I can’t fathom why he was hanging around with them, but it makes me angry. That, clearly, is him trying to fit into some kind of image. Which is… understandable. Sad, but understandable. I think we all feel like there’s someone we “should” be in life. That doesn’t make it healthy or right to try to be that person, but. I can see what he’s going through a little.

Christians and their tolerance of drugs. I shouldn’t even get started on that, but I will. My entire dad’s side of the family has this “you must be a perfect Christian” attitude. But [b]somehow[/b] it’s perfectly fine that two of my cousins are on drugs. [b]Somehow[/b], it’s perfectly fine to ignore their problems, to not even try to help them. The hypocrisy of it really, really pisses me off.

I want to believe in Ryan too. You’re right, we don’t write about people if we don’t see something special about them. And I want to hold onto that. I just. I believed my cousin once. I believed him when he said he’d try to turn his life around. Instead, he crashed and burned. Because of drugs. So it’s hard for me to sit here and try to have faith that this is some kind of misunderstanding. But I will try. For him, I’ll try.

My summer. Well, I’ve had summer school for the past three weeks. Is anything worse than taking summer PE for four hours every day? No because you failed it, but because you need room in your schedual? Guh, it was torture. But it’s over, which is good. I went up to my cousins for the fourth and set off crazy homemade fireworks, which was really fun. Honestly you’re summer sounds waaaayyy busier than mine, which makes me feel a little guilty for being this tired.

You lucky duck! You get to drive. All my mom has let me do is drive around our parking lot. But I bet Driver’s Ed was no fun. I’m going to try to take it in February to get my permit. And shit, Tae-Kwon-Do. Remind me not to mess with you xD

Anyway, I’m hungry and this message is already a page and a half in ms word, so I’ll stop rambling.

Ily2 <3
~Kay

It's been a while Ry. How are you?

Panic... God, I still can't really believe it. And then all the rumors about Ryan. My family has problems with drugs so I'm used to hearing about it but... I look(ed? I really don’t know anymore) up to him. I enjoy writing lyrics more than anything else, and he was honestly a lot of the reason I started writing them. And now… I'm scared. For him, for all of them really. That shit is dangerous. It fucking... it changes people. I've seen it happen.

I'm working on a oneshot for them. I can't create worlds like you can, but I can hope and write for the one that exists. If that makes any sense at all. It’s about… well you’ll see when I’m done with it, but it’s really just about everything that’s going on with them right now, except it’s set a couple years in the future. Like you said, suffering to inspiration.

I've really missed you. How's your summer so far? Mine has been pretty shit, so I'm hoping yours has been alright. I could use some good news :/

No problem.
Thank YOU for writing something so good.
It's refreshing to have a beautiful read. : >

Agh, I know what you mean. I had a lot of works in progress that I was going to post, but, I don't know, it feels wrong to post them now. However, I want you to update, because your stories are great, and, it'll be good to read something that isn't solely based on their split.

Your welcome.
Again, thank you for writing such good work.

I can't wait for more.

P.S
If multiples of this gets sent, I apologize. My computer is on the fritz- it either keeps sending multiples of things, or not sending something at all.

Hey, honey! It's Dani Delightful. I just updated my profile with some very very very important news so go process it with your looking balls. Do it. Sorry for being MIA for so long. Forgive me?

xoxo Dani D

Crap... forgot I wasn't writing in ms word... forgive all the typos and uncapitalized stuff O_o

-looks down at previous comment and agrees-

you alright ry? i miss you. if ur busy i understand, we all are but... idk, this seems like more silence than usual. i worry easily, so sue me.

and um... this is Kay. fiddling with usernames, again. i probabaly won't keep this one, or maybe go back to my old one, who knows.

hope to hear from ya soon <3

Hey.
I'm worried about you.
Eh, I'm probably over-reacting and you're just busy.
Are you okay?
I really, really miss you! <3