Behind The Wooden Attic Door - Comments

@ Tipsy Returns
Thanks :)

I'm so envious! I should repeat this, you're just too good! Man, I should do a poem rec blog for you! I will, promise now! This is just too awesome, and the ending... superb! Loved it <3 Great great poem (:

I like the structure of the poem, though I felt that with such short stanzas, the repetition of the first line one each stanza started to feel redundant.

It left me wanting more details. What are these photographs? HOW do they show bravery, love, and lust? What was this relationship like? I like the structure and the concept, but I'd like to see more personality. There's just not much detail. Outside of the wooden attic door, which suggests antiquity; the covering of dust, which suggests that these memories have been untouched for a while; and the locked chest, which suggests that the memories were abandoned willfully and deliberately, there's not much that really tells you anything about the relationship and the memories. Those little hints--the door, the dust, and the chest--are well-placed, but as a reader I would like to see more suggestive language like that to make the memories and the speaker's relationship to them come to life.

First off, sorry this took so long!

This poem is stellar. You managed to construct a really powerful piece here. You created this vivid, powerful and utterly captivating gem. You are a wonderful writer. You used the word perfectly, you managed to give it so much life and importance, which I'm so very glad you did.

I think one thing that I questioned was whether or not I would have gotten the theme had you not mentioned the word love so many times. That was the only thing I found myself wondering about.

Your word choice was fantastic, your use of imagery was fantastic, your flow and rhyme was entirely impeccable.

@ A. J.
Thanks

Love it. You're really talented at poetry. =]

@ Lightmydarkness
Thanks :)

Beautiful. This flows perfectly and I love the imagery! :)