I actually really like this poem, and when I say really, I mean REALLY like it. The line where you say "now I'm shopping for my headstone" I thought was very clever. And I also loved the part where you say "would you kiss me in my casket?" like the narrator is wondering if their significant other truly cares and would stay with them even after death. It's a really creative way to make a sort of helplessness and even desperation come across. The only thing I didn't like about the poem was the last line. I can see why you might put that, but it's not so much that I'm going to say it's untrue (haha) rather than the fact that it just seems out of place. It just changed the whole poem for me, make it much more casual I suppose. But if that's the way you wanted to to be in the first place then I totally understand.
March 13th, 2010 at 03:49pm
