Green Irises - Comments

Wow, dude, this was amazing.

That is all I have to say.

Wow this really is amazing. I love it.

You definietly should win the contest ;D

I don't know what to say that hasn't been said already.
The beauty of this really is breathtaking.

I think I found this through a contest or whatnot...
But anyways, absolutely gorgeous.
I've never seen one run-on sentence written so
wonderfully and so smoothly, before. And I am
a definite fan of the run-ons and other strange
sentence compositions.
I can't think of anything that needs changed.
<3

I found this in her signature. ^

Beautifully written. I had to read over it a few times and I still had a difficult time figuring what the plot was about so when I read the comment above me I felt like I was cheating on a test and was actually quite thankful for doing so... :tehe:

This was... Beyond amazing.

It wasn't until the second time I read through this that I realised what it was about.

Your attention to details and description is incredible, and for something so short, you told a story.

What I took from it was an older, disabled person watching their grandchild running through a garden (I loved the description of the garden as well, velvety is a perfect adjective.) and falling. The older person can't do anything as this child they love dies... it's incredible.

"Lips almost devoured by a manic smile" I love this line. I describes the carefree and energetic nature of a child running around in a garden.

"an alerting emotion swallowing my chest" This describes panic, perfectly. Especially helpless panic. I can imagine this person suddenly clutching their chest and wishing for the breath to yell for help. It creates a million images in my head.

One and only thing I noticed that was remotely bad: "suddenly illumined by a shocking crimson" You misspelled illuminated. :tehe:

It was amazing, such a story told for a short piece.

This was definitely the one that deserved to win. :tehe:
Your use of adjectives and description was like... :cheese: wow.

short, to the point, and I loved it.
Hope you win :D

I saw this on the boards and decided to check it out.

This is utterly brilliant, and the fluidity of it is amazing.
Well done:]