whoo I had some spare time to kill so I decided to read another one of your stories ^_^ This story is, quite literally, amazing. [and that's only the beginning] I can't wait to read more updates!
I think you might have meant, "Better yours than mine." :cute:
Like hell I can[/i[\].Small italic mistake. At the end of chapter 7.
"Holy shit! That's hot," I yelled pulling away from him. I blew on my wrist where he had touched me. It felt like it was on fire, and I immediately turned on the water to its coldest setting and put my wrist under it. "Ah..." I sighed as the cool water cascaded over my wrist and dulled the burn. When I was done, I whirled around to Kyle. "What the hell was that?" I demanded. He only smirked.
"Holy shit! That's hot," I yelled pulling away from him. I blew on my wrist where he had touched me. It felt like it was on fire, and I immediately turned on the water to its coldest setting and put my wrist under it.
"Ah..." I sighed as the cool water cascaded over my wrist and dulled the burn.
When I was done, I whirled around to Kyle. "What the hell was that?" I demanded. He only smirked. ^ You might want to space things out like this. Sometimes it's hard to read or confusing as to who is speaking. When so much dialog is in one paragraph. :cute:
Other then that I find your story quite good. The only other thing I could suggest is taking your time with the plot, don't rush things along.
I Love This Story. Kyle's my favorite, he such a sweet contradiction. Though I love my fair share of Ryan.... or Master. I find his temper somewhat sexy.
I want to read the next part noww~
I loved the latest~ <33