I believe that the concept and creativity of this is great, I just think the actual writing leaves a lot to be desired. This needs to feel more natural, not so simply, and perhaps amp the vocabulary a bit. Hope that helped hunny.
Wow, this is a really interesting concept. I loved how the voice shifts between each character's POV because I rarely see that actually pulled off in a story, most of the characters end up sounding the same.
I'm curious to know how Danni really got pregnant...so I'll probably end up reading more later. =D