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After Supper. - Comments

  • oxford comma.

    oxford comma. (200)

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    druscilla; slashed:
    One of them has to hurt the other and Ryan knows he can't hurt William.
    Okay, I get it now. I didn't realize that either of them could hurt the other. Thanks for clarifying.
    November 16th, 2007 at 12:18pm
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    ZooZoo Magee:
    I really liked the concept, but I don't understand how Ryan hurt Gabe. In the story, it says Ryan knows that William will have to hurt Ryan and then become Ryan {who is now Gabe,} but I don't see how Ryan hurt Gabe, I just...don't get it.
    One of them has to hurt the other and Ryan knows he can't hurt William.
    November 16th, 2007 at 11:55am
  • oxford comma.

    oxford comma. (200)

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    I really liked the concept, but I don't understand how Ryan hurt Gabe. In the story, it says Ryan knows that William will have to hurt Ryan and then become Ryan {who is now Gabe,} but I don't see how Ryan hurt Gabe, I just...don't get it.
    I did like how much there was to this--all the descriptions and explanations and story--that was wonderful. I liked that dialogue didn't dominate.
    My favorite lines:

    Four if you counted Gabe, but no one was.

    And he realized then that no matter what Ryan was wearing, what he wasn’t, whether he had just come out of a shower, if it was right after sex, no matter what . . . Ryan would never be exposed completely to William. Ever.

    It took William a moment to remember how to understand words.

    and a new lighter. It was orange.
    November 16th, 2007 at 11:18am
  • libbey crocodile.

    libbey crocodile. (100)

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    Words can't describe this.

    It was beautiful, in a bit of a morbid way. You're right about that.

    I think it made my heart cry.
    November 16th, 2007 at 08:47am
  • Fuckin Stallion Duck

    Fuckin Stallion Duck (100)

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    Damnit, I was in tears by the
    time I finished reading this.
    So beautiful. I've never pictured
    Ryan like that. It was just so amazing.
    November 16th, 2007 at 06:39am
  • Rooskaya;

    Rooskaya; (155)

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    They're like the living dead.
    *shakes*
    no no no
    they're suppposed to love each other..
    *bursts into tears*
    Nooo Gabe!!

    But I loved it, yes I loved it...
    November 16th, 2007 at 04:29am
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    ^
    It's soooo not my fault.
    I had this story in a dream.
    I just wrote it down.
    November 16th, 2007 at 04:04am
  • Ash's Lizabeth

    Ash's Lizabeth (150)

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    -cries-
    Why is everyone killing Gabey off?

    This was just beautiful, as always.
    I really loved how caring you made Ryan and how vulnerable William seemed. Wonderfully characterized [sp?].

    xoxo
    November 16th, 2007 at 03:54am
  • folie a dru.

    folie a dru. (1270)

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    This one is really hard to some up.
    It's, like... beautiful in that really morbid way.

    There was nothing after supper on Sundays, nothing but upstairs.

    And if he would have realized what that meant at that moment . . . well, it really wouldn’t have mattered much. It wouldn’t have stopped anything. Not really.

    Ryan and William went to wash their hands after they were done eating and Ryan pulled his gloves on after he buttoned his jacket, telling William to button his or he’d catch a cold and he did not want to stop at Target to pick up Sudafed, thank you very much.

    I rather like it.
    It's slightly over 4500 words and a oneshot.
    Let me know what you think please.

    Happy reading!

    xoxox
    -Dru
    November 16th, 2007 at 03:48am
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