awwww i absolutely loved this one too! i was sad when i realized it was over, but that's okay because it was so good! keep writing all your awesome stories!
November 6th, 2008 at 05:15pm
Hello Lizzy! I'm going to start this comment off by saying that since you wrote this, I'm sure it's going to be fantastic. (:
In just the first chapter alone, you really established things well. I'm glad that you took the time to explain how Brendon and Frank have had problems in the past, and just talk about Frank's emotions in the whole thing. It's nice that you didn't just shove Gerard in the first chapter, unlike some stories.
Chapter Two: That was a classic moment, the whole Frank and Mikey flirting thing. I think it's cute that they were really good friends, although they weren't that close. The insight into their pasts was also a nice touch; I can kind of guess where Gerard's going to come in now.
Chapter Three: I love the whole flashback feeling, both at the start and once they got to Mikey's house. That last line was a cliffhanger as well, so thankfully I can just keep reading.
You know, I kinda feel like one of my one-shots was a rip off of this, just because of the whole remembering your past moments and stuff. :S
Chapter Four: :o
That mural. That freaking mural. I can just imagine that moment perfect and the heartbreak Frank must have been feeling. I also applaud how you introduced his character without actually bringing him back yet. I'm really not sure why Gerard would leave Frank so cruelly though, especially since it's obvious from the flashbacks alone that he cared quite deeply for him. It's propelling me to read more. Nice use of the Demolition Lovers lyrics as well; they really made the mural seem just that more beautiful.
Chapter Five: The Love Sucks CD was perfect, and very nice choice of songs. Mr. Brightside is a freaking awesome song.
That moment at the start between Frank and Brendon on the phone kind of brings back the point of why Frank isn't happy. It's quite obvious that Brendon isn't exactly the world's greatest boyfriend after all.
EEP! FUCKING EEP!
Learning To Fall and Thunder! Fuck. I cannot congratulate you enough for including those songs; they reflected the moment so well. And once again, nice ending to the chapter. Sometimes, ending a chapter with dialogue, especially a cliffhanger, can sound kind of awkward, but I think that worked very well.
Chapter Six: It was a nice touch that you switched to Gerard's POV, to let us see his side of things. I must admit, I wasn't expecting it, but it was still nice. And you always pick the best songs for the moments; Prelude by AFI was just such a perfect song. And once again, a cliffhanger! Jeez, you are freaking good at those.
Chapter Seven: That kiss on the rooftop was just... whoa. It was such a magical reuniting. I'm really getting kind of worried about how Frank is going to break it off with Brendon, especially since it's so obvious that he belongs with Gerard. I really hope it goes into their past a bit deeper in later chapters, but I'm sure I'll find out, won't I?
Chapter Eight: I'm glad you showed us how Frank met Brendon; your flashbacks are very effective, instead of irritating, because they actually help move the story along better.
Forever. Times infinity. Times forever.
That line pretty well melted my heart. From it alone, it's clearly evident how much Frank and Gerard were in love, and it only makes me root for them more.
Chapter Nine: I'm actually glad that you didn't go through with that sex scene. I think it would have been a little too soon, especially since they just got reacquainted. I'm really worried about what's going to happen to Gerard if Frank does tell him about Brendon; they've both got emotional issues, and I think this is so far one of my favorite chapters actually. And that ending... what is in that envelope?
Chapter Ten: :O
Oh my gosh, I think I'm going to cry. For some reason, that confession just hit me really hard; Gerard went through so much and he didn't abandon Frank at all. I wasn't expecting anything like that and it really makes more sense now.
Chapter Eleven: Their little gestures are the sweetest things ever. I'm so glad that Gerard was accepting of Frank still being with Brendon, but I have a feeling that not everything is going to be happiness from here on in.
EEP! You and your endings woman! I swear, you're lucky this story is already completed or I would beat you with a shoe for such cliffhangers.
Chapter Twelve: Mikey is such a sweet guy. There are quite a few similarities between him and Gerard. And who said that last line?
Chapter Thirteen: Whoa. Brendon sounds like he's a complete mess, but I really have no sympathy for him. I'm very proud of Frank for standing up for himself, and finally letting loose on Brendon. He completely deserved it. Those last words though... I do kind of feel sorry for him. You really are good at doing that, y'know?
Chapter Fourteen: That sex scene was so gorgeous and I rarely say that. But you could just tell that there was nothing but pure love behind it, which makes it entirely gorgeous in my book. But what mistake did Frank make?
Chapter Fifteen: Well, that makes me feel a bit better. I was afraid that he was going to go running back to Brendon. But..
That prick. Him breaking Pansy wasn't just heartless, it was childish. It really makes me dislike Brendon's character even more.
Chapter Sixteen: That was a good way to give us some more insight into Gerard and Frank's past, as well as some of their sweetest moments. Those birthday gifts were some of the sweetest I've ever heard of, although the Skittles thing is a bit cliche. (:
Chapter Seventeen: Y'know, I didn't even realize until this chapter that only a day or so had went by. You did a good job of packing so much into those few days and it didn't feel rushed at all.
All of those paintings were enough to nearly make me cry again. I can just picture each one in my head and they are simply gorgeous. Gerard's love for Frank is so evident in those paintings.
Chapter Eighteen: That whole moment with the paint made me giggle. I can only imagine what it must have looked like.
Chapter Nineteen: I'm not really sure what to say about this chapter, other than the fact it almost made me cry again. They really are the epitome of perfection and sweetness and it almost makes my head spin. They are the perfect couple and if only love was always like this, then I think the world would be perfect.
Chapter Twenty: What a sweet birthday; there's really not that many people in the world who would be willing to that for someone but it really just shows how deep the love between Frank and Gerard is. And that ending...
Lizzy, I love you.
After reading every single chapter of that story, I am completely reminded of why you are one of my dearest people in the entire world. You are the absolute Queen of Frerard Fluff, without a fucking doubt. Your writing is gorgeous; even though you have evolved a bit since this was completed, it is without a doubt one of my all time favorites on Mibba.
This story completely captured what would be 'the perfect romance.' It makes my heart hurt that it isn't real, because that's something that is wrong with the world today; not enough people love each other like this. I'm amazed that this is based off of your real life, but I love it that much more so.
Those comments I made above feel insufficient to the overall beauty of this story. Words cannot describe how much I love this. I will admit that it made me tear up a few times, just from sheer happiness.
I absolutely love you and I am so honored to write with you and I am so glad you wrote something like this. I hope this comment made your day, because this story certainly, without a doubt made mine.
ily, :arms: :arms:
xo.
I have to agree with that statement. 
