Just A Fox - Comments

This isn’t the kind of story that I normally read, but I loved it all the same! Diana and Jesse have one of those tragic love stories that will never end well, but I couldn’t help rooting for them anyway. I love the parallels with her relationship with Vincent; Diana had to play both parts, watching a lover die and knowing she was leaving a lover behind, and my heart broke the tiniest bit for her. This story is like a movie that I would be on the edge of my seat for (and probably holding a few tissues because I’m a hopeless romantic and a crybaby).

The story was wonderful and emotional the way a good story should be, and I’m so glad I read it.

*Comment Swap*
I didn't really like this. It's more of personal preferences, I guess. The writing was good. I like your writting style. I wish I could have been more connected with this. Anyway good job! And I'm sorry for my lacking comment.

Hello dear author. Xd Comment swap brought me to another story of yours and i'm glad it did. I realized from commenting to another story of yours before that your summaries are written like this. This time it didn't work out. The explanations about the words should be at the author's note and you have to write an actual interesting summary. The kind of summary you have posted now does no justice to the story. The story was really amazing and even though it seemed rushed at parts, I loved it. Keep up the great work. That's all from me so bye. ~Marian.

Hello dear author. Xd Comment swap brought me to another story of yours and i'm glad it did. I realized from commenting to another story of yours before that your summaries are written like this. This time it didn't work out. The explanations about the words should be at the author's note and you have to write an actual interesting summary. The kind of summary you have posted now does no justice to the story. The story was really amazing and even though it seemed rushed at parts, I loved it. Keep up the great work. That's all from me so bye. ~Marian.

Wow, this is really good. I really like Diana Avery’s character; she’s strong spirited and edgy yet she is still a woman and feels just like any of us do. The dialogue is really good too and I like the description being simple yet straight to the point. I kinda feel bad because of the whole Jesse thing but eh, things happen right? Also, the grammar and spelling is nearly perfect and so is the layout; it’s beautiful! And well, good job with this! Awesome work hon!

second time coming across this masterpiece, this time from comment swap.

The descriptions of everything are very drawing for a time piece. A lot of people forget that things weren't as snazzy then as they are now. Even the names seem to fit what the names would have been back in the mid twentieth century. You have an amazing skill of writing, and by reading your stories, you have an amazing ability to be able to write just about anything, and that takes talent. As before mentioned, your writing skill is phenomenal, and especially with being able to get the speech and dancing perfect for that time.

This is a moving, riveting and beautiful piece.

The descriptions were well-detailed and drew me (and probably more readers) into the story perfectly. I liked that you did an original fiction on TB on regards that there are probably not that many stories (or at least none that I've read) on here. I will say this however, the chapter font is a bit too small to see; I at first couldn't find it and had to go to the top just to get to the chapter. I do like that the background doesn't overshadow the story and yet it shines as well.

I loved the style of writing and the plot was sad but compelling :)

Let me elaborate. It was fantastic! You have an amazing gift of writing :)

I found this story quite original and unlike anything I have read before. First, I don't often read stories set in the 50s-80s era, but this one I just could not stop reading! I was very sad when Jesse died; I figured Dolly deserved her chance with him. And then the very end made me wow. I'd never have thought that would be how you ended it.

So kudos! It's beautiful. Please, keep writing. get published.

--J

Here from comment swap. Firstly, well done on the original idea! I absouletly loved it. It really drew me in. I think that your style of writing is alos original and I find it imteresting. I think that you have a good amount of information. Enough, without lumping it on the reader. It was also emotional and I wanted to cry when the main character was crying. Good work
-Maddison

It’s obviously some sort of pivotal moment in my existence that the comment swap features matches me up with two – two!!! – of your amazing stories in less than a day or so. Truthfully, I feel bad for not reading your works earlier, but I’m so glad that I finally have the chance to do so! I simply must address the beauty of your layout; it’s gorgeous. It’s simple, and the little gif definitely adds some pizzazz to it. Me likey (; Anyways, onto the story!

I originally thought that this story takes place in the 1930s/1940s, but I can’t be sure. It’s possible that the slang gives me that kind of vibe, I’m not 100% sure, or maybe the fact that the overall edge of the story reminds me of that. But nonetheless, the premise of this is interesting. I like these two people, Jesse and Dolly; despite the fact that they’re pretty much this Bonnie and Clyde duo, haha.

And apparently, I was right! It does take place in the 1930s. Guess it helps watching movies and reading books about that era c; Oh, yeah, I’m good. Ahem. MOVING ON, LOL.

I feel bad for Jesse and his situation, having his wife leave him. :( That’s so sad and tragic. He seems to me like he’d have this predisposition hate for women, but somehow found change in Dolly (or as we finally know her as Diane). And I find this Remington dude a massive creep. Yikes. Honestly, I found myself smirking at his fate, but was promptly surprised to find out what was really going on. I honestly didn’t expect anything like that; robbing banks and people to find a cure for TB?

Gurl. This is probably the best and most originally Bonnie and Clyde-ish idea that I’ve ever stumbled upon. I’m…I’m speechless right now.

I find the ending perfect and tragic, somehow. She might have actually infected him, but she and Jesse pay the ultimate price for it in the end.

I literally have nothing else to say. I’m perpetually speechless at the brilliance of this. Truly amazing job, my friend. Amazing, amazing, amazing! <3

Definitely a work of art :). I loved it :)

I normally don't like time pieces because people forget that they're not from what's goig on today. Yo did a magnificent job I especially liked how you used so much Slang from the right time period. It was beautifully written and I got a little choked up when Jessie died. I knew it was going to hAppen but I still didn't want it to xD you really did great with the characterization. The characters were relatable and three dimensional which is really hard to convey in only one chapter. So congratulations on that. I think the thing with Vince was almost rushed but not in s bad way which is kind of strange but refreshing. This was sad and cute at the same time. I liked it a lot.

Wow, I didn't like it at first, but by the end I loved it.
I'm not sure how to explain how I feel about it, but I'll give it a try;

I loved your main character, she had a spunk to her that just drew me in.
I didn't completely understand some of the slang, like I'd appreciate it if you'd answer me one question. What's a pally?
I felt for her when Jesse died, hell I'm still a little choked up about it.

Wow, this is fantastic! It’s got a sad plotline, but that makes it even better. Period pieces are so hard to write, you have to get every detail right or it isn't believable. You've done an excellent job at that, down to the slang and the dancing and everything. Excellent job!

just simply amazing. second piece of yours that i have read. you have this way with writing, the emotions just flying out of the computer. simply stunning. recommended.

Holly cow, Za; this was gorgeously written and the plot was so sad yet entretaining to read.

I love Dolly. She is so strong without leaving aside her being a woman; she's got flaws and virtues and that makes her such a rounded up character.

The story was so tragic yet I couldn''t help but love how you ended everything.

It was so gorgeously written, all the emotions in their propper place and all those astonishing descriptions mind blowing.

Oh my gosh, this is... amazing. Probably one of the best one-shots I've ever read. The slang, the setting, the characters, the slang!



Everything was amazing. Simply perfect.

This was cute.
I liked how you dealt with the detailed emotions at the end.
I so really liked (like tara) that it was set in the 1930's.
I loved the slang words you used to make it just set perfectly.
Great job, Za.