Horrid Thoughts with Hard Questions - Comments

I tell you, Mattgasm did a good job on the latest update. You go girls!

I predicted it being a brothel from the moment Adrian walked up to them to be honest, but that aside, I'm loving this. Moremoremore!<3

Wow these chapters flew by, since they weren't very long.
When I was at chapter 18 and I read that she was in a brothel, I was like shit haha.
This is pretty good and I didn't expect it.
Good work xoxo

i like this.
i read most of it.
and i love the banner for the story.
the ont is a bit irksome, seeing how i'm a times fan.
but this is really really good.
i might just keep reading.

I only read the first chapter. It was good.
I like it.
There is a few grammar errors but only one or two and nothing major.
Good job otherwise.

Wow, this surprised me for some reason,
but I really enjoyed this, honestly.
As I was reading the chapters when Adrian appeared, I was like,
"What's up with this guy? He's so odd."
It made me want to keep reading, this is very good, I also like the layout I must add.
But please keep writing, I enjoy this very much.

-subscribing.

Sidenote: I read from chapter 1 to 8

The plot of your story is really interesting, how you set the summary immediately hooks the reader and makes you want to read more.

Into the story, the descriptions are done nicely and your character, Elizabeth, has a very strong voice of her own, which is really good because it denotes that you have been working hard on the character.

Regarding the flow of the story, the dialogue, plot, and descriptions flow rather nicely, too, the only tip I'd give you is to slow it down a little, by that I do not mean make more chapters halting the story. What I mean is that the story sometimes seems to rushed, which leaves the reader with a lot of information to process.

I really liked how you threw the reader immediately into the story and how the whole abuse has been going on for a while already, which pretty much explains the rushed decision to run away, so that works amazingly with the flow; but, what bothers me, is that the rapid changes of scenery go too fast that the characters barely stop to take a look to their surroundings, making it hard for the reader to picture the setting in which your characters are in.

On the dialogue, I really liked how easily your characters interact and how simplistic are their dialogues. They know each other, that is obvious, hence why they don't talk much.

Overall, the story is rather interesting and contains a hooking plot. The flow of the story works rather nicely, aside from a few typos I noticed through the chapters I read (mainly focusing on the tags and beats that follow the dialogues, but those can be easily solved), and your characters are beginning to gain their depth.

It was enjoyable.

I've gotten as far as the 12th chapter. Sorry for the late comment.

This is actually really good. It reminds me of a book a read. Improvised, I think it's called? Anyway, I love stories about people running away. It's something I'd like to do.
Claire- her character is very admirable. She has been through so much and yet, she still tries to find the good in people.
Lizzy- also very admirable character. She's trying so hard to make Claire happy. It almost kills me.
I really like the shortness of the chapters, actually.

Oh, and when that guys pulled a gun on Lizzy, I was like, "Oh, hell naw!"
I will finish this ASAP. <3

this is great! although i have to say in the begginning a few of the chapters had a kind of weird talking to action ratio. Besides that I love it. Also: Adrian is a creep and i totally saw it coming. Sadface.

Guuughgughuhghguhguhghghgksagagab.
Cliffhanger! I'm gonna die from angst, because I very much like this story...
Guess I'll wait. :D

Ooooh, very cool! Your writing is really good! There's just something sort of...mysterious about it, for lack of a better word.

I love the layout. :D

Of what I've read so far, this story seems fairly promising.
It's definitely interesting and original.
I really like this.
You've definitely got a dedicated reader.
I'm subscribing.
:D

I have already commented on this and nothing about my opinion has really changed. But I do like the layout ;)

Ooh, I like the layout. Very simple and easy to lead - plus, the banner is freakin' awesome. <3

This is really good so far. I've only read the first couple of chapters, but I feel like I'm going to continue, so yes, you have a subscriber. :D I love your writing style; it's...unique. You don't try too hard to jam in descriptions for no reason, which is always a plus in my book.

Now back to reading. C:

I must say the picture frightens me. Maybe it's because her eye looks as though shes about to get murdered. But what I really meant to say is that I love the originality of this. Two people suffering, and decide to run away together. I would do it if I were in that situation.

So I still love everything about this. <3
But - the fact it's done in present tense. =/ I just don't like that writing style. ):
Apart from that, the writing is brilliant, as is the plot and characters. :D I adore this!

I really like this. :)

Because it's so short and simply detailed, it feels quick-paced.
I love how they're running away as well--from those mean parents
of theris. D: That dream was pretty deep, too. D:

I should seriously subscribe to this. :)
Fabulous Job. <3

:O

Brothel time.

Adrian's an asshole, in my opinion. You should kill him off.

I'm loving this so far. I'm still subscribed, and I've been reading every update since chapter 3. I really, really love this, so keep at it.

Well done, as always.

Dr.

I really like this.
Two awesome writers with a kickass storyline.
Runaway stories usually are pretty cliche, but this one wasn't.
I loved this, and I think you should continue! :)

I don't like Adrian anymore, I think he did plan it out. GRR.

Haha, anyways I'm still loving this story and can't wait for another update.

-Katie