I like it ... but if you don't mind me saying it ... it seems like I see the same things in other stories and it is starting to become a bit of a cliche, you know? To be honest, the only thing that keeps me coming back is your writing style which is really good by the way. So, if you could actually give it a twist to make it seem more your own. But your writing in itself is flawless ... the idea is just overdone.