July 19th, 2011 at 01:13am
Lines that I loved most:
"Like I was drowning in a pool of standards, and I just cannot surface."
"It would not matter to me if the world had ended right there and everything went into chaos."
This was a true piece of art.
I liked how you compared his parents to the Devil and demons. Again, the tone is very clear. You stimulated the audience with the emotions that character is going through. The flow is amazing, you did great with the transition of timing. the banner matches the story perfectly. This story made me so sad, but it was so good. I liked how you tied up the end with the P.S..
That is love there all the pain. It was wonderfully written and I don't believe it is cliche.
=)