Apple Pie Wall and the Shapely Frenzy - Comments

Sorry, killing in French is tuer, not mort. What I wrote was, I drink juice when I'm dead because it's fucking delicious.

It means 'sweetie,' as mon chou, but chou itself means cabbage. Cream puff is choux à la crème, I believe. Merci pour ecrire en francais. (Not at all gramatically correct, miel, but whatever). I will feed you if you so please. And my favorite humorous lyric is probably "I drink juice when I'm killing because it's fucking delicious." In French that would be... "Je bois du jus quand je suis mort parce que c'est putain délicieux." It took a lot of microsoft word symbol searching to get those accents, mind you.
As much as I think he would have reacted a different way to retelling the story, the human mind knows no bounds so you have creative freedom with that, it was a great chapter. I especially loved the dialogue that they have. It doesn't feel forced or Elizabethan as most dialogue feels. If you could put some of their expressions or their reactions to the dialogue and pull some more descriptiveness into those sections of the story that would be really great.
Do you think my next comment will be even longer than this?
P.S. you should find out what I drink juice when I'm killing because it's fucking delicious is in Chinese. Then we can swear at each other and have secret jokes in our respective second languages!

I love the sleep talk :D And murder always makes my morning better, so the ending was a definite plus. Not as well written as the first chapter due to some glaring capitalization errors that took my mind away from the story itself, but it was still quite good and still retains the same descriptive conversational style that the first chapter had.
My favorite song is... I actually don't know. I think it's It's Not a Fashion Statement It's a Fucking Deathwish is my most played, and I think musically it's the most diverse of the Revenge era, so I think I'll go with that. Unless you're asking for an emotional answer, then it would be Cubicles.
Cheers for long comments, love! Update soon :)

Frankie say WHAT now!!!!?????!!!!!! 0.o MORE!!!!!

I enjoyed thw updated.hm? Favorite song has to be demolition lovers

I really like this version it's not as go straight to heavy make-outy atuff ( though that was much loved) and Franks so adorably confused and I feel like I'm a pedophile staring at baby porn when I see his cute little face!!! MORE, PRONTO MY GOOD KILLJOY!!!!!

really nice, cant wait for more :)

Ooo. This is way better. Your style has evolved a lot, I like how it's very conversational, though still descriptive enough to make sense and come across well in a prose-ish way.
This plot also seems far less spontaneous than the original, despite how good that was.
Can't wait for more!

I loved this.hope you update

MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The author can get mibba at home she just can't type at home ;) thanks though erinn
thank you guys very much

The author thanks you. She can't go on mibba at home, but thanks, and we're working on the next chapter.

Really loved that!

Awesome

I loved that chapter!!! :P
No wonder... XD