In Spirit - Comments

Your sweetie comment:

Well first off I'm disgusted with the fact it's still on hiatus despite it being almost November and your GCSEs (cough) are clearly over. Minus points for you, Rosie.

"I was sad about leaving ate first" – I assume it's meant to be at first rather than ate first. (In the first chapter when the little boy is speaking to her on the swing).

You get instant points for the mention of Doctor who, and you gain all those points you lost before back with the mention of David Tennant!

But onto the more serious side of the comment, I really do love your writing, Rosie. I love your detail, the way you write you characters and how you manage to make them come to life, almost like I'm able to see them through my own eyes because they're just so real. Each chapter was enjoyable and I was wanting to see what was to come, only it stopped after chapter four so I had no way of seeing what was to come after that chapter. Therefore you should write more of this and post more of this and in general focus on more of this so that I may be able to see where this will be going and just how the characters are going to become more real and everything.

So, yeah, I love your writing, Rosie, and you should write more.

I really like how this is written! There's a nice flow and I think that your characters are pretty well rounded. (:
You describe things very nicely and I can clearly envision each scene in my mind. I also enjoy the plot and think that it has some major potential!
Really great job on this! Keep up the amazing work!!

Hello, I've been looking for ghost stories on here. Unfortunately, I haven't found very many, so I thank you for writing this. The story's written pretty well, and quite fascinating. I haven't gotten too far into it yet, so I wonder how she's going to tell them about the ghost. Good job.

So perfectly beautiful. I love the way it has a slight somber mood throughout it. The theme itself is wonderful. Who doesn't love a good ghost story? I'm so glad she isn't a typical girl who sees ghost that freaks out about her abilities and tries her best to not get in touch with them. I'm glad you made her brave and passionate about what she does. The imagery throughout every paragraph is beautiful. I can picture everything perfectly.

To be honest, I've never been a big fan of present tense. But you did a fantastic job with it. For someone who doesn't like it, you made me really love it in your story.

;___; Please continue it soon, it's really, absolutely wonderful. I really loved it.

brilliant summary. your layout is wonderful. your description is perfect, and my goodness, how your writing flows is even better. it's smooth and easy to follow and keeps your interest in a wonderful sort of way. the concept is brilliant - ghosts! i love ghosts! and you don't make her all afraid of her ability, she loves it! wonderful! very, very good work.

gah.

Connor...
</3

I'm in love with this story all over again :]

Update soon, please, by the way! Xb
I love this.

Oh damn. :b

Absolutely adore the layout for this. The photo is beautiful and the color scheme is lovely. I think it's odd that she likes that she can see ghosts though. That would be traumatic for a child, unless of course they don't show up as they did when dead. Also, you have classmates as plural, well wouldn't it be just one of them?

I was sad about leaving ate first at first?

Interesting plotline for sure. I've always been a fan of supernatural/paranormal type stories so I believe i'll be subscribing to this at first. It's not much of an introduction, I think maybe a prologue would help with this a lot and give us a bit more insight on her 'gift' or power or whatever. Maybe a past experience with a ghost instead of immediately launching us into this predicament. Otherwise, great work.

this is a really good idea, and it's going great so far! (:

I'm so glad this is back up! Can't wait till the next update.

THE LAYOUT IS SO PRETTY ~ ~

For some reason, the first chapter reminds me of the show, Ghost Whisperer, and Marianne reminds me of Melinda. You've got such an amazing start so far. I love Marianne's personality almost as much as I love Michael's. He's so cute. :') This is wonderful so far and I'm probably going to be subbing so I can come back and read more when you've posted!

This is a revamp right? It looks nice the summary has me "oohhh what's gonna happen." So it has me interested. =D Can't wait until you start this. I will sub now <3

What’s with the semicolon at the end of the title?

From the first bit, I think its a little cliché. Most popular girl? Most intimidating boy? Surely that should be explored and the reader should find out through the narrative of them?

It looks like he is standing precariously on the swing at first, but his feet is a few inches above the seat. Instead of “is a few,” change it to “are a few.”

I couldn’t quite understand what tense you were in? Was it present, past? You keep fluctuating.

It’s not bad, though. I mean, about the above thing, I’d probably make the same mistake. Try and get a beta? Also, perhaps try and lessen the intensity of the descriptions and keep on the story path? I noticed in the first paragraph of the second chapter, there was a lot of stuff that just dragged out.

Wow. Very nice. The banner is stunning, as in the rest of the layout. This is also wonderfully written, though with a few mistakes, but who doesn't have those? I love this a lot now. I wonder how she's going to talk to them? Seriously. xD I'm so subbing and reading on! Please continue. <3

The whole concept of this story is really interesting. Your writing is beautiful, and the details are great. I can really picture what kind of personality Marianne has.
Oh and btw, Michael sounds adorable. For a dead kid.
good job.

I like this story. The idea of talking to ghosts is something that I find fascinating. (Now I sound like a weirdo...) I can't wait to see where this story goes. :)

Sorry, I entered it too fast. Start again! I love how its not all up in your face and flashing different colors.
2.The chapters arent bunched up together. I adore that! I hate when authors don;t add spaces in between their paragraphs -.-
3. I have commented before, so i have nothing else to say. KEEP UP THE AWESOME WORK YOUR REALLY TALENTED AND I HOPE MORE PEOPLE READ THIS. ^.^

Did you change your summary? It looks like you did..
Anyways, I don't have a lot of time to write a full blown comment but here goes.
1.I LOVE the layout. I didnt notice it before (I think) I love the picture and I love how its not to flashy, I