Kill Me With a Thorny Kiss - Comments

ooh, this is old. So, I'm guessing you won't be updating again. Sigh, I wanted to know what happens next.... but, I bet your writing has gotten a lot better. ;}

Please continue?! I love it! :D

The layout.. It hurt my eyes and my head. Red on black is not a good combination. I realize it fits but it gave me a massive headache.

Onto the story.. It's a really good idea and it's extremely original. It's clear that you've put a lot of thought and work into this and you didnt just slap this on. Your hard work really paid off. This is creative and I like it.

I like Rose. She seems sweet, but Melody is my favorite character. Damon is okay, but I'd like to see more personality in him - Rose, too.
I like how you included a few scenes of what Rose goes through. That's very important in establishing a story and you did it very well.

There were a lot of grammatical errors thoughout the whole thing. I would contact an editor to ask them to help you clean it up - ESPECIALLY the run on sentences because there is a ton.

The writing style seems a bit.. amateur-ish? I think you should work on maturing your writing style. By that, I mean really think about the words you're saying and exactly what you want to convey. This could turn out really good if you work on a few things.

I do like this, so keep it up. Don't give up on it.

This is amazing. You have some skills, dude.

Okay. I read through the first three chapters and most likely I will be coming back to complete the rest. :) Your banner is lovely, as is the backdrop. I normally don't like letters in any color besides good ol' fashioned black and white, but because of the layout I think the pink and purplish black background was a nice touch!

This is a fascinating idea. Melody is certainly an odd name for a fallen angel/demon, but still is an interesting choice. I found it somewhat sad that a thirteen year old of all ages would want to die. :(
Children are still so young and when they think that death is the one escape just seems sad.

I really am curious as to why Melody wanted Rose instead of her friend instead. Another reason to continuing reading.

There were a few grammatical errors I wanted to point out, just for future reference.

I lead her to a booth that was place slightly more remote than many of the other booths, somewhat due to the fact that it was usual demons that fulfilled wishes not fallen angels

There were two errors in this sentence.
I lead her to a booth that was" placed in a slightly more remote area" than many of the other booths, due to the fact that it was "usually" demons that fulfilled wishes, and not fallen angels.

flashed me an apologetic look and motion that I could finish
And motioned that i could finish

Her massager’s bag bouncing at her side
Her "messenger" bag bouncing at her side.

I groaned groggily as I reached for my phone trying to turn off the alarm I had on it
I groaned groggily as I reached for my phone, trying to turn off the alarm I had on it
Just a needed comma for this one... sort of nitpicking but it makes all the difference in the world as far as the flow of writing is concerned.

it had been Sarah favorite song
it had been Sarah's favorite song
For this one it was an easily overlooked error. Besides these, I found no other problems.

This is a fascinating story. The fact you were able to successfully place a demon story in a modern time is very impressive. I will definitely be back to read more.

Keep up the great writing! This story has a beautiful way of unfolding, it leaves the reader definitely wanting to know more.

Just finished reading the whole thing... all i have to say is you better update!!! I loved it!!! You have me curious. I like Damon better than Melody, i think, if not only because every time i hear her name i think of my melody. But Damon is definitely my favorite so far. XD Can't wait to read more!!!

Your story is beyond unique when it comes to a story about angels (both dark and light). I like the idea that you've wrapped around this story. It's very interesting and you've put a lot of work into this, I can tell. What I do have to point out about it is you do have many mistakes and sort of switch from past tense to present tense often which can easily be fixed. I would suggest looking into a beta so your story's quality might improve. (:

Amazing,The minute I read the summary I was hooked,then after the first chapter i was beyond hooked this is a really good idea. The characters are great, the story itself is really gripping. Can't wait to read the rest of this:D

I just started reading this, and I must say I loved it. I sat and read all the chapters you had up in one night. Can't wait for the next chapter <3

That was amazing! Keep going!

I really liked this story. I will definitely subscribe. I can't wait to read more!!!

I really like this, but it needs a lot of work.

May I suggest getting a Beta? They can edit your stories and fix all of your grammar problems, that way you don't have to post a story that hasn't been edited :D

The layout hurts my eyes. I don't know if it's the font color you used or the background or what, but the layout just doesn't really work.

Just try to keep the sentences simple, correct grammar, good spelling, nice punctuation. It seems like there's too much going on in one time, but maybe that's just me.

- I read chapter six, in case you were wondering.

this is so amzing and such a different idea! awesome!

I'm liking it so far.i cant wait to find out what rose will have to give in return for her death wish.melody is wicked!but i like her.another one of melody's p.o.v wil be great.
I think you need to focus a little bit more on damon.his character hasn't developed much in comparison to others.even his p.o.v's dont reveal much about him.
The quotes you put in the story are amazing.
Upload soon:-)

didnt expect melody....and okay i commented!! :D so thats 4 more to go!!! woohooo people need to hurry up -_-

i just read "kill me with a thorny kiss" and i loved it :)
your writing abilities are so much more powerful than mine :O
I envy you! :)

great stuff :)

Lol you asked me to read and I've read.
And I...............LIKE! Woop Woop! ;D lol. (That's a great acheivement considering I'm not easily pleased.)
And I love your little sayings, one of them being 'A promised life is a promised death'.
Although there are a few grammatical errors I think that can be fixed with proof reading.
Apart from that I enjoyed, and I can't wait for the next chapter.
Oh and also I know this isn't really the place to say this but thankyou for reading my story and commenting :D It was nice of you thankyou.
Anyway, update soon.
I think I might move on to another one of your stories while I wait :P

Awesome really like it! :D

Honestly, I love the way you have developed the characters. They are so different in the way they talk act and that is so hard to do and aupplaud that. Keep more coming :)

i only read the first chapter and i have to say amazing, you put your thoughts together so well, you've found a true reader in me