This story is AMAZING!!! I cannot believe this story doesn't have more comments!! Your writing skills are terrific!! I feel so bad for Mary, I hope Jack doesn't give up on her (But I know he won't :D) Please update soon, the suspense is killing me!
I don't really care if its short or crappy editing or shitty (which its not) I just wanna keep reading. so good job! I love this story, cant wait for more