I guess I'll set up a template for judging here, not all will play in and there won't be points for everything but this is just stuff I think about when seeing the piece.
Layout: It's alright. I like it. I've never been fond of the trebuchet font, but, hey. That's just me.
Grammar/Spelling/Crap They Teach You in Fifth Grade: You're good! Zero errors! :D
Writing Style and Fanciness: I like your style. The first time I read this, I didn't really like it. But this time, I did. The second paragraph is my favorite part. I don't really have much else to say. :)
Nitpicky Me: The only part I really didn't like was the word 'evilly'. I just think it's a little... young sounding. Perhaps try something with a stronger connotation like... Wickedly or cruelly. Dunno.
Overall: Very, very nice. You show a lot of promise. You wrote something I didn't expect from the picture and it was a fun read. Good job! :D
I guess I'll set up a template for judging here, not all will play in and there won't be points for everything but this is just stuff I think about when seeing the piece.
Layout: It's alright. I like it. I've never been fond of the trebuchet font, but, hey. That's just me.
Grammar/Spelling/Crap They Teach You in Fifth Grade: You're good! Zero errors! :D
Writing Style and Fanciness: I like your style. The first time I read this, I didn't really like it. But this time, I did. The second paragraph is my favorite part. I don't really have much else to say. :)
Nitpicky Me: The only part I really didn't like was the word 'evilly'. I just think it's a little... young sounding. Perhaps try something with a stronger connotation like... Wickedly or cruelly. Dunno.
Overall: Very, very nice. You show a lot of promise. You wrote something I didn't expect from the picture and it was a fun read. Good job! :D