By the way, I read this in one day. I forgot to point that out; that's also another props I have to give to you. I... OMG, a day. I don't know how I managed to but I did. XD
March 24th, 2014 at 01:27am
Okay, so I dove head-first into this story. Hello, by the way. One of you know me, one of you don't. That's okay though; purely read this because it was an Alex fanfic. :D
So the beginning of it I loved. It was this drama where she left him and I enjoyed the spite-y ness of it where she was pissed at him while he acted like nothing happened and was acting all cocky and that made it funny. It started to kind of fall apart for me by the end of the first part, obviously, with the big shock that he was with her sister and that he was the groom. I think it did because some of the parts when it came to this didn't make much sense to me.
For instance, he didn't talk to her sister for weeks, and he was just randomly staying with his cousin? And then he just shows up on the wedding day and the intention was set that they were still going to get married? Like, that didn't make sense to me. At all. If he were the groom, he should have been there for like, a rehearsal at least and not to mention, if it were any other girl, if he had been gone that long, without communication... like, I don't understand how her sister was still set to marry him. THAT DAY, when they showed up. Like it seemed too immediate for him to be marrying her right then. Like, how was it not postponed? Any normal person would have done that, I think.
And on that note, another thing I'm going to mention is that Avery's sister went behind her back and dated, let alone GOT ENGAGED, to her ex. And then her sister had THE NERVE to be pissed off at Avery when she knew Avery and Alex had a past? Like, I didn't understand that, at all. I felt like Avery should have been more pissed off at her sister for taking her fucking man, and not even caring. That was like, a HUGE violation of girl code; I'm just speaking of it in my perspective because I have a sister as well and I know that would be the natural way to confront that. Not the way it was in the story.
But then again, maybe it just went with their character traits. I really have no idea. But it just seemed so OFF to me and that was two things that really bothered me about this story.
Criticism aside, I will now point out what I liked about it. I obviously liked it if I'm commenting on the sequel page, letting you know I finished the sequel as well.
It was really cute. I mean, at a certain point I was kind of weirded out by how much Alex clung to Avery, even becoming addicted to pills to fix his problem, but it just showed how much he didn't want to let her go, I guess. I admired that he chased after her for so long, when so many others probably would have given up. I was getting frustrated with Avery because she couldn't see it. I understood her viewpoint for a while but then before they got back together by the end I was just at the point where I wanted to scream WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! XD But I'm happy they managed to work things out and get back together.
When I got to the end, I was sad it was over. Even though I had a few problems with the way the plot line played out I'm still now left with that nostalgic feeling because that last author's note made it seem like you were going to continue with like, one last update but I guess you guys changed your mind. Which is fine, but I'm just kind of left sad now with that expectation. You may want to go back and edit that author's note just so other people aren't left with the same feeling. It was a good way to end it though; the author's note just sort of threw me off.
Anyway, overall... being COMPLETELY honest, this wasn't the best story I've ever read. Hopefully you can respect my opinion and understand it, after my explanations. However, it was really good and I feel if a few things were changed this could be made into a 'best story.' If you two ever want to revisit it. That's totally up to you though and I understand if you're too busy right now to do so.
It still left me with that sad feeling though that it was over and for that I give you a thumbs up, because... not all stories do that to me. This story managed to.
Good job; I enjoyed this story.
-Jenna
