Sick Little Games. - Comments

"I wasn’t a girl who loved or was loved. I was more of a girl who used or was used." Kill me. That line was so brilliant. You know, I'm straight up obsessed with the syntax of a sentence or two. I tend to over think mine, or jumble them up, but there couldn't have been a better sentence to hook a reader.

Okay, partially rambling because I a) have drank too much coffee, and b) am on a severe syntax studying kick. The story all around was very well written, had a very nice flow. But that hook definitely hit close to home, so thank you so much for that.

You know when you hear something unintentionally too true? Yeah. And then you laugh because, "Oh, crap. I'm not the only one who had been somewhere in their life with a mindset to write something like that." I think that's what turns me on so much about shared writing. It's the full explanation of your soul without it having to be too true.

My only criticism: try to break up your sentences a little more. Shorter ones, mid length, and then the whoppers. It's a great exercise to learn more of a tactful art in syntax, but it also reads like a melody.

Anywhoozle, thank you for writing!

Harry Potter <3
Your layout is amazing and the way you write is Incredible. The name nixx is really originally and unique.
I really do hope that there's more where this came from!
I'm definitely subscribing

Comment Swap: I can't tell you how happy I was when I found out this was a Harry Potter story. The only thing I didn't really like about it was the fact that the characters are all 15 and having sex with each other. It's kind of bad but it happens. The story is really good though, I love the main characters :) I usually try to stay away from fan fics of tv stuff. Don't ask me why I just do, this was really good though :)
<3

Comment Swap: It's an odd take on the Harry Potter series; sluts. Never would have thought to read something like this, but nonetheless is was a bit interesting. I really like your writing style with the emoticons, a lot like texting and its written pretty well. Sometimes when people write things like this it all comes off strained, but yours flows well and feels natural

Ohmygod! I love anything Harry Potter! I eat that shit up like pumpkin pie! The summary instantly grabbed my attention, and it's not often I see a plot where it's two friends fighting over one guy. In fact I was never do. I do wish there was more detail though. But I did enjoy this very much. And spin the wamd? I lol'd at that one.

When I saw the title, I sort of guessed it was an All Time Low fanfiction, but it is not. I really love that it's a Harry Potter fan fiction, but it's so different from a lot of other Harry Potter fan fictions. I absolutely love how unique yet pretty relatable the original characters are. All around, i like it a lot.

I just read through all this, I decided to read it cause I thought Id see how Laura was doing with her writing, I have to say I love this story :3 *subscries* Will be reading this whenever you update :D xx

I am loving this new layout and banner! The layout is so pretty! I love it (like i didn't just mention it before...) and wow...spin the wand huh? Heheh It's like spin the bottle! Hehehe but with wands...way to state the obvious...OK then! Hehhehe

Even though I know that what Nixx and Sophie are saying is not true at all it sounds on some level that they mean it....but anyway this is really good again! Like you guys can make a bad chapter!

First I got to say, from your title I was thinking something totally different. As I read your story, I loved that it's a fan-fiction yet you have such original characters I forget that's it's based from Harry Potter. I do like the whole letter idea, and the great thing is; it's not repetitive. One good thing I noticed, you tried your best to stay somewhat true to the books. As I read, I haven't found any grammar nor spelling mistakes so that is a plus.

I can't wait to read more
Keep up the good work.

I love the well developed characters, original characters, that you've created. I also really like the letters, it gives me a different feel so it's not repetitive. I like how you tried to stay true to the vibe laid out by the books themselves. I thought this was very good! (Comment swap)

The titles wonderful c: I love that you're taking two original characters and putting them into a fan fiction. It's very original, you don't often see that. You're a good writer and this is a lovely story and plot. I'll be waiting for an update, hope it comes soon c:

Sorry to the authors. I don't know why comment swap keeps bringing me here!!!

But I just realized that in my first comment I wrote. "Competely." Well that's awkward. I meant "completely.". Haha.

Oh. I got this for comment swap again. So ditto what I said before! ;)

I love the concept of using two Competely original characters. Since the setting is already there for you to use, having unique characters is essential. Very interesting so far. Keep it up!

love the title :3 I also enjoyed reading about your Original Characters, they have complex personalities and it's a good plot that you have used, I think the idea of doing half in letters and the other half as an ordinary story layout t'was a good idea. The layout made it hard to read though, so you should probably think about changing that :)

Keep Writing and Good Luck

love the title :3 I also enjoyed reading about your Original Characters, they have complex personalities and it's a good plot that you have used, I think the idea of doing half in letters and the other half as an ordinary story layout t'was a good idea. The layout made it hard to read though, so you should probably think about changing that :)

Keep Writing and Good Luck

love the title :3 I also enjoyed reading about your Original Characters, they have complex personalities and it's a good plot that you have used, I think the idea of doing half in letters and the other half as an ordinary story layout t'was a good idea. The layout made it hard to read though, so you should probably think about changing that :)

Keep Writing and Good Luck

so comment swap bought me here and i aim to avoid all harry potter fanfictions but read a few chapters anyway (it wasnt what i expected).
but its quite cute so far and your characters are quite cute. though the chat speak in the first few chapters is irritating i understand its just for the letters. good luck with this :)

I like your characters, they seem very complex, and I'm kind of addicted to Harry Potter Fan Fiction, so there's no way I couldn't like this.