Adorably Clueless - Comments

Hey, I'm here for the comment swap!

Straight off the bat, I love your layout. Very simplistic yet still really pretty and fits with your story well.

I like your writing style, its very fluid and it captures real life well. The situation Alice is in could be one other girls might relate too, especially the whole is it best friend love or actual in love kinda love.

I'm suspicious of Alec, he seems to have turned a complete 180 with his nature and I think he's up to something. I do like how you've managed to portray this change of character whilst keeping some old aspects of him which were established earlier. I do think Alice is being a bit too trusting though after what happened.

Well done so far:) Can't wait to see how it goes so I think I'll subscribe:)

Wow! I absolutely love how descriptive you are. It takes real talent to be descriptive in such a way where is does t bore the reader but instead draws then in. It feels like I'm right there next to Alice and Jace in school as the story is happening. I could feel the hovering tension when Jace was about to duke it out with Alec. The picture of Jace's body tensing up and getting into that fighting mode was so clear! I definitely love this story and your style of writing.

First of all, I love how you describe things. It’s the right amount. I am not seeing many grammatical errors. In the second chapter I noticed that you started putting a space between your opening quotation mark and your dialogue you might want to fix that. Just remember to proof-read, I know it can be hard to catch those things. In my personal opinion, I don’t like the point of view. It seems repetitive. Alice did this and this. That’s just my preference though. Other than that I really like the story so far and I seriously hope you continue to write it. It has a lot of potential and I want to see where you take it. The layout is a problem. I can read the story, no problem. I really like the gif at the top.

Comment swap -

I absolutely love the layout, it's nice and simple and it doesn't drown the story out. My only complaint is the the font is too small for me. I like how warm and lovey-dovey this story is, it gives me the fuzzies, haha. It is a bit cliche, but not overly-so. I think you need to go in depth with Alice's character a little bit. The summary was adorable, and I hope you've hit your goal!

Comment swap
Really nice flow, a bit cliche but still good to read

I have to agree with the others; really warm and fuzzy, with a good flow, but a small bit cliché, and I've accidentally done the switching between first and third person as well, but none-the-less, I love it.

This is really, really cute and all the warm fuzzies from the friend feels are perfect. Like can I get a Jace over here? The flow between scenes are good. The only problem I can see is that once or twice you seem to switch between first and third person for like a sentence or two. Other than that there doesn't seem to be any grammatical mistakes or spelling. Very good, keep going.

Comment Swap

So I have to say that I really enjoy this story so far. It’s adorable, I love the relationship between Alice and Jace, and you’re writing style is great. I am concerned, though, that this is a very cliché, overdone storyline, so I’m hoping you have something under your sleeve to make this stand out! It’s also a little mind boggling, for me personally, how the characters personalities seem to change from one chapter to another. For instance, as kind and adorable as Jace is, I just can’t see him being mean and pulling out the ultimatum card on Alice. I just don’t feel like he’s possessive and mean enough to do that, no matter how much he hates Alec. Other than that, though, everything was wonderful, and even though it’s past November, I strongly suggest you keep working on this! I have subscribed and can’t wait to read more!

i love this :) and its kinda obvious who she should be with *Cough*Jace*cough*
update soon

The writing in this is superb. Your style flows very easily and it reads just as smooth. It's actually very refreshing to come across a story that has a maybe not so original idea for it, but have it be portrayed with such ease and with such flow. So really, kudos to you for making this turn out so well.

@ Riah63
Updated.

@ butterflywings16
Pweasssseeeeee :( I will love you forever. Promise

@ Riah63
NEVER!

ALLISON SUMMERS YOU NEED TO UPDATE THIS NOW ... Please :) for your loving friend AKA me

P.S. i might just cry if you don't

The idea of having two best friends who had known each for a while, only to end up falling in love with each other is such a cliche. But consider yourself lucky because I like the way you're writing this classic cliche. Jace is protective over Alice, and its utterly adorable. I love your descriptions and way with words. Everything flows easily, and I shall continue along reading this story. Keep up the good work:)

Apparently my comment wasn't long enough for the comment swap. So here I go again :P

From the opening of the first chapter I was interested in reading more because of how you introduced Alice. I thought it was cute and made me want to read more.

When you introduced Jace, I thought "this is going to be cute." I was right. Even after only a couple of chapters, the cuteness from their feelings for each other rising past the subconscious level was adorable.

As I said before, you write well :) Normally when I read stories on here I'm stuck scrolling back up to make sense of what's going on. With this story however, I didn't have to do that. Your sentences were easy to follow and didn't make me go "why!?" The whole time :P

So again, great job :)

This is a really cool story :) it's not normally something I would read, but I'm glad I did. I can't wait for the next chapter to see what Jace is going to do about Alec!
I could read it through smoothly without having to stop and go back to try and figure out what you were saying. Great job

So stayed true to my word and read chapter 2 (:
I find it funny how I'm into this little chick story lol. Damn Alec seems like a total ass. I'm seriously wondering what Jace is gonna do now.

Comment Swap

I have to say first that I'm usually not one for this cliche stuff, but it is good and probably one of the most interesting ones that I've read so far. I also have to point out about the whole thoughts, can you put it in italic like everyone else so we can identify them as thoughts?

Other than that I like it and I'm looking forward to you continuing it.

(Comment Swap on mine; The Girl Who Made A Choice)

Comment Swapper~

I gotta admit this story is pretty good. I'n a way I'm kind of seeing a lot of stories like this but this one is the exception. I love the grammar and the story has a nice atmosphere to it. It caught my attention immediately, which is a plus since I don't really care much for these stories. I really like this one though! :) I'm curious to know if Jace is gonna beat the crap out of Alec.
Up date soon! :) Looking forward to it!