With Stitches. - Comments

Hi there!

I noticed there were a couple spelling errors and whatnot. In the first chapter, I noticed you used "Stuartist" instead of "Stewardess". There are a couple things that should/shouldn't be capitalized, as well.

On the upside, I love that you change up how you explain your characters are saying something, instead of using "Narcissa said" or "Dawson said" over and over. It adds variety and makes it so much easier to read.

I'm still only a few chapters in, but I'm really enjoying it so far and I'm definitely going to continue. Great job!

Well to be completely honest, I'm not actually a fan of Harry Potter. Although after reading this, I do understand a little better why other people do, it's interesting. You've written this in such a way that people like me, who know nothing about the serious, don't get lost. You conversations between characters are very imaginable. They feel real, like I can imagine the people actually talking like that. You have great descriptions, you paint a very vivid picture of each scene. Also, what I liked was that you don't spent too long on each scene, you keep things pretty short, so the reader doesn't get bored. You have a good use of paragraphs going on too, a mix of short and long keeps me interested, I don't feel like I'm reading huge chunks of writing. Over all, this was very well written! Well done, and thanks for entering.

Comment Swap!

Hello there, first off I'd like to tell you that, big fan of HP and getting this on CS was the best! I really love the way the characters are written and the plot is just really easy to find and go along with. Only thing that caught me off guard was Voldermort and the way he plays his role, other than that it's perfect. I absolutely love this story, one of my favourites right now. This is just amazing! Keep you the great work!

Comment Swap!

Hello there, first off I'd like to tell you that, big fan of HP and getting this on CS was the best! I really love the way the characters are written and the plot is just really easy to find and go along with. Only thing that caught me off guard was Voldermort and the way he plays his role, other than that it's perfect. I absolutely love this story, one of my favourites right now. This is just amazing! Keep you the great work!

Comment Swap!

Hello there, first off I'd like to tell you that, big fan of HP and getting this on CS was the best! I really love the way the characters are written and the plot is just really easy to find and go along with. Only thing that caught me off guard was Voldermort and the way he plays his role, other than that it's perfect. I absolutely love this story, one of my favourites right now. This is just amazing! Keep you the great work!

Comment Swap!

Hello there, first off I'd like to tell you that, big fan of HP and getting this on CS was the best! I really love the way the characters are written and the plot is just really easy to find and go along with. Only thing that caught me off guard was Voldermort and the way he plays his role, other than that it's perfect. I absolutely love this story, one of my favourites right now. This is just amazing! Keep you the great work!

@ ItsMeEmily
Woah. I've never talked to anyone who didn't like Harry Potter! That's very interesting to me(: Thanks for giving it a shot!!

Comment Swap! Hello dear, how are you doing? Well any who, I'm not a huge Harry Potter fan. I never got into the books or movies, I don't know call me crazy. Because of that though it's difficult for me to get into this story and sadly dear I can't. The only reason being that I have no connection to the characters that a lot of the other readers do. I do believe this story is, in fact, quite well written though. Keep up the fabulous hard work deary!

Comment Swap!

Although I did enjoy the Harry Potter stories, I'm actually not a very huge fan of HP fics. Among the other comments, I did find Voldemort out of character, but that's perfectly fine (considering how everyone else has said it, I'm just pretty much repeating something that you already know). Anyway, great work so far!

'Potatoes

I love everything about this. I'm a Potter fan, a massive one at that and to see a story like this written from the characters of the films and books really does it for me. I love the layout, the style, just everything. This is pretty amazing and you have some fantastic writing skills, I can only imagine what else you are probably capable of writing. With skills like this, I'd say pretty much anything is capable for you. Keep up the great work and you'll do just fine.

Oh my goth please update soon! I love this story!

Comment swamp
I just couldnt seem to get into the story but that is probably because i have never read the Harry Potter books or watched the film. However saying that the writing style and layout are great. I hope you continue to write this story.

Hey! >Comment Swap< and I'm glad it brought me here. First of all, the layout is awesome. I like your writing style and I think you portrayed Draco very well. I did find Voldemort VERY out of character, but I guess it was...okay? I like the plot line in general, so no complains .Keep up the good work and Update soon!

@ Lyrical_Miracle
Ah, I see. Well, I really like it all the same, so keep it up!

@ Ashes to Graphite
Thanks for the comment! I actually made him that friendly on purpose, I definitely know he's WAY out of character. And as for the semicolon, God knows I need some work! Thanks(:

Ah yes, Harry Potter! I love you comment swap!

Okay, so I just read the first two chapters, and I must say I love your writing style. It's very good :) I would like to crique just one thing though (boo hiss, I know). Honestly, I feel like Voldemort is very out of character. Maybe it's just me, but it's not really believe able that he would just...you know, boom, be all romancy on this 14 year old right off the bat. If I were to make any suggestion at all, it would be maybe to slow down his friendlyness a little, but I guess at this point you are far enough along in the story that you'd sort of have to rewrite the whole thing. I'm not expecting or suggesting you do that at all, I just thought I'd give my 2 cents. Also, just on grammatical note, your use of semi colons is interesting...I would suggest replacing most of them with periods or commas... :)

Anyway, keep up the great work!

Cheers,
Ash

I'm excited to see how her and Snape's relationship grows. Please update sooon! I want some romance.

@ dream'n.reality.
They sent you here twice? Ohmygosh xD Thanks for your input! I'll be sure to use it! (I'm still learning about semicolon's mehself, haha.)

lol for some reason commentswap stuck me here again. xD oh well, hmm I love the description in the first chapter. It seems subtle and not to standoffish with the grammar which I like. The third paragraph line, I'm not too sure about semi's but I'm not exactly sure you used it correctly. lol but other than that everything looks great! Which says a lot if the only thing is the semi colons haha, great job again!

Heyy, comment swapper over here..and second HP fanfiction I've been sent to right after the other lol
this isn't the kind of story I would choose to look at, but I'm glad it sent me here.. you're really good at writing and it's very easy to follow the story.
One slight niggle- some parts are a little confusing..maybe re-reading it and see if it makes sense to you would be a good idea!
Good luck with your writing!