my diary 03-04-13 - Comments

Please don't commit suicide.! Think of your dad, Amanda, Melanie... They would all be really, really hurt if you killed yourself. I care about you, too. And I promise that someone will fall in love with you. It just takes time

@ ironi1234
i'm just a little piece of shit there is not going to be anyone on this planet who will fall in love with me! and yeah i know it's just so hard....

Youre only 14. Your entire life is ahead of you. Think of all the things that if you had succeeded you'd be missing out between falling in love, being a grandfather, and just being happy. Even if it's hard now it will get better. You just have to stay strong and brave out these few years. What do you mean no one wants you? Who's supposed to "want you"? And I meant it. I'm always here for you. I care about you. You're not alone.

@ ironi1234
i'm fine i guess just a little weak and sick
and bcs nobody wants me and i am sick and tired of being raped and abused by my mom i just can't take it anymore...and okay thanks ♥

Omg are you ok? Why did you try to commit suicide? What happened? I was really worried when we didn't hear from you. Any way I hope you're better and I'm always here if you want to talk or something <3

@ Dkrbrownie
aww :) thanks i will! and yes i did i really tried my best
i don't thanks man

@ ironi1234
idc it sounds weird :) you can do it! i believe in you yeah i'm a little better now
i'm going to be al right soon

alexander,
i can't imagine the frigging pain you are going through
but i think you tried you best on not cutting for 2 days
but you gotta keep trying man!
don't give up hope!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cuz you mom can't just create something beautiful and destroy it!

@ mraapie123
I'm so happy I managed to make you smile, as weird as that sounds :) No harm from trying. I'm also going to try and stop. 2 days clean :D Yeah I really think so. Hope you're better now good night!

@ ironi1234
aww :) haha that made me smile yeah i guess i can try idk
idk could be i have no idea
yeah thanks still a little sick but i'm okay

I just want to give you a big hug. You don't need cutting. You are better than it and you can stop. Take it day by day. And I just did the depression thingie and got a 80 -_- im not even sure those are true as I'm not depressed. Anyway hope you feel better!

@ ironi1234
they didn't idk why i'm back at my mom nobody told me
and i don't care that's okay

The foster family can't just decided to give you back to your mom. Can you call the person who arranged for you to go to that foster family and show them what your mom did so they can find you another one? Sorry I'm getting kind of pushy and sticking my head into your business aren't I?

i don't think so everbody thinks i'm at a foster family in the netherlands and i know i can't i just...i can't stop her and thanks

@ mraapie123
Can't you complain to someone or contact someone for help? I mean you can't live like this for 4 more years. She's ruining your life. I really wish there was something I could do to help you.

i don't mind you can ask anything and i don't go to school bcs my mom doesn't want me to she has money for it that's not really the problem the problem is she doens't want anyone to know that i'm here everybody thinks i'm in a foster family in the netherlands like my twinbrother and little sister

@ mraapie123
Yeah I guess that does help sometimes. I normally draw write or listen to music whenever I feel depressed, a urge to cut again, or not to eat. Btw if you don't mind me asking and you don't have to answer why don't you go to school?

@ christajean
okay wel thanks :) and yes it is hard and yah i hope so it does

Im so sorry you have to deal with this :( but someday it will get better, this is truly heart braking, but if you need anyone to talk to, you can inbox me(:

well thanks :) i can put y feelings upon here and thanks again i will <3