Virgin Blood - Comments

Amazing update!!
I just wish she would tell Matt..
More soon please!

It's not good to keep secrets, especially when there's a nutter on the loose! Matt's over protectiveness is so sweet, but I get that it could be stifling for Olivia. It's his first baby, of course he's going to want to protect her, what man wouldn't? Cut him some slack love, he's just trying to do what's best.

And I think that keeping the note from him, is going to come back and haunt her.

More please :D

Love, love, love the update!
Please update again soon?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
:D

hahah awe matt and food.. that was just adorable, how his brain just shut down and his tummy kind of took over
dude, olivia- not cool! of course he'd understand that she lied about the broken glass- he'd be crappy cop if not and keeping everything to herself.. got a feeling it'll come back and bite her in the ass..

I can't believe she isn't going to tell him about the note!!!! That's craziness!!! Looking forward to more :)

Ooof, Matt is quite sexy when he gets all masterful isn't he? I wouldn't want to stand in his way when he gets pissed!

I love how Zacky casually drops into the conversation that the guy got butt fucked haha. I really like his character.

This really is a clusterfuck isn't it. Hopefully, there will be more evidence to gain from the latest body, or maybe the perp will clip up along the way.

I'm incfredibly sad to have to drop this story, it's one of my favourites, but I just couldn't keep up with everything else I got going on. But I will be following along with you two :D

More please!

This is quite a mess lol
I loved the update!
It was amazing.
Please update again soon?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
:D

well holy mother.. this case is just one hell of a mess isn't it?? but all the more fun to read and yeah- stay clear of matt when he's pissed off

Ijustdiedicanteven! No words can describe this awesomeness

Love it so much, I have rec'd it. Really love the fact that there is some actual substance to this story, great job.

Chapter one: -- For setting the scene, it was great. Invites you in and gives you a cuppa and some Tim-Tams and then off it goes, weaving the tail for you to enjoy. To the writing, wonderful, really well written and seriously, that's a great thing. Many stories end up turning people away at the first chapter purely because the writing is crap. This is not the case here, so great job there :D As to characters, I love the way Matt and his Mrs mesh, they have a great bond and familiarity that is obviously thanks to their marriage. The only problem I'm having is her name. I went to school with an Olivia who was a constant tormenter my entire High School life. So don't mind me if I just...ignore that and replace the name with something else. Other than that, awesome. Fave line: "Be a good…thing." LOL. Very eloquent Matt.

Chapter two: -- Question, why would a bad guy whip out a hunting knife to kill someone when he has a gun and has just shot them? Surely he'd shoot them again? Unless I'm reading this wrong...if that's the case, ignore the question XD When Jimmy and Alexis turn up on the scene, you had Johnny and Zacky collecting evidence before they took photos. Just a friendly tip, forensics don't do that, they do it the other way around, one takes photos as soon as they're on scene and the other follows behind numbering everything, writing it down, and then bagging it and labeling it. Collecting evidence before taking photos can abstract the case, and could potentially lead to one or both losing their job, depending on the circumstances. Sorry, just putting it out there To continue on with being a nity-picky jerk, PDA's at a crime scene are highly unethical and inappropriate. Not the word I wanted to use but my mind just completely went blank on me Basically, no kissing at a crime scene haha.
To the rest of the chapter-I enjoyed it! I know that up there ^^ might seem like I didn't, but that's not the case. That up there is just for clarification for future reference....of sorts lmfao. I did enjoy it. Writing "cop stuff" is rather difficult unless you've had inside intel, experience, or are close with someone who has. There's only so much you can learn of the net before it all starts blurring. Great scene setter, good follow on from the previous chapter.

Chapter three: -- Fake drugs-sugar? LAWL! Them guise were gon' be screwed. LOL. I like the addition of fake substances, the implications of such an addition. Why would someone run the risk of selling fake drugs unless they were actually there for something else, ie, killing some people. Obviously Matt's right, this isn't cut and dry. The whole time Zacky was in the room, all I could picture was Tony Stark Again, be careful with the PDA's, it's unprofessional.(That's the word I was after! ) Sure, they're dating, but keep it to the confines of their home. Not just because "Superior officers in the room, show some respect," but because showing that kind of relationship just sets them up for being poker chips. Bad guys will know who to go after if they want to hurt either of them. Good writing and again, nice follow on. Co-writes can be notorious for being all over the shop because of different writing styles, but you guys are doing great. Your styles all compliment each other.

Chapter four: -- LOL. This line: "making each of them want to throw their heads on the desk and cry." the mental image I get is one of the guys just, taking their head off and throwing it at their desk with a loud and unhappy "nope." I have a bad feeling that maybe something bads going to happen to Matt's Mrs and the baby and all hell with break loose and they'll all feel guilty because they never listened to him and his worrying when they clearly should have taken the threat seriously. That's bad policing on their parts, not only for drinking on the job, but not taking threats serious. They, of all people, should know that all threats have the potential of doing damage, and when ones aimed at them and their loved ones, you'd think they'd pay attention haha. Aside from that, a few paragraphs didn't enter but that's about it on that front. Still great writing and still working well with the previous chapters and styles.

I shall do more tomorrow. For now, sleep. So ignore most of this, I'm half dead and laying in bed, not a good combo haha.

I'm loving this story!!!
Matt and Olivia are so cute together!!
Zacky and Alexis are adorable also!!
I felt bad for Brian. Getting sick like that. :( I wanted to cuddle him and make him feel better. I laughed when he was nervous about asking Melissa out.
Can't wait to read more!!
Please update soon!!

Well, I'm glad Olivia talked to SOMEONE, even if it wasn't Matt. And YAY for ZV, the nerd! =)

thanks for the shout out :D:D I really appreciate it! YAY! THEY GOT A LEAD! WOO! But what if something sketchy happens O.o CANT WAIT FOR MORE!!!

woop whoop!! you go zacky you little nerd you aawe olivia went to the station at least

Oh my goodness!
Who is threatening Matt and Olivia?! Whoever it is better stop or Matt is going to kill the person.
I loved the update!
Please update again soon?!?!?!?!?
:D

I'm glad that Zacky was able to find something to hopefully break the case, but what I want to know is how the threats against Matt and Olivia are connected to the case. Can't wait for more, please don't make us wait so long for the next update. Oh! What about Brian's date???

Woohoo go Zacky!!! And poor Olivia!! Looking forward to more :)

More soon please love this

I'm kind of in love with your banner, it's amazing.
You're a really good writer and you should really keep on going like this :)