Father and Daughter - Comments

So even a gypsy can see the monster in Dan when just meeting or seeing for the first time. I bet she was thinking how could a teenage girl be with him. And what's more Dan scared off a guy that scared Mina right away. I very much look forward to the next update!

When I saw you updated I got a big smile on my face; i absolutely love this story.

This chapter I really like how you see Dan's progression of how much he loves Mina and how it continues to grow. I also like how he just randomly wanted to go on a vacation; i like his spontaneous personality. I also love how Dan got a huge man to wimp out; that was awesome. update again soon :D!

the layout is absolutely gorgeous, and the summary pulled me in immensely.

Now that I've read all of the chapters you posted, I must say that this is easily the best story I've come across on mibba. Everything and everyone you describe is so vivid that it truly feels like I'm watching a movie. Everything is so clear to me in this story and I can't deny I'm getting very, very into it. You're an amazing writer; your flow is absolutely perfect. I also adore that this isn't about romance. Every story I've ever read on here (mine as well) are all based upon the idea of romance and this IS about love; but a whole different kind and I love that. I can't wait to read on because this story is absolutely fantastic. Amazing job, and please update soon!

This is amazing. The summary pulled me in immediately and the chapters themselves kept me clicking to the next on as soon as I reached the end of a chapter. In regards to the last chapter, I have a feeling that more happened to the boy responsible for his wife and daughter's death and the boy's family than Dan is letting on. I look forward to further chapters. :)

This is such a interesting and unique idea. You managed to captivate me from the summary. I can feel, slowly but surely, the story coming to life beautifully and you truly know how to set a scene. I'm looking forward to the next update! (:

This is really good. I love everything about it.
But (sorry) I wish the test was a bit bigger so that it is easier to read.
Other than that, I can't wait until you update!

Okay I am loving this story! It may start off slow but you definitely nail the details that loved to read about, especially their feelings well except for Dan. He is a complete mystery! I look forward to the next update!

Um...I haven't even started, but I read the summary and am immediately blown away. That's such a unique idea and I'm stoked to read it!

Oh my gosh. I'm so blown away by the first chapter. Like I said, it's so unique. But besides that, it's so raw. The writing is sophisticated and simple, but it's authentic and natural too, if that makes sense. Some writers write and it comes across as stuffy and stiff, but your writing is easy and clean. Your descriptions too are really simple but still beautiful. By the end of this chapter, I'm terrified of Mina's future with Dan, but I'm super excited to read more.

I'm falling in love with Mina. She's so simple, but at the same time, she's still very complicated with how she feels and how she thinks about things. I love her relationship with Dan, even though I know what's going to happen. And the realization that Dan's wife and daughter died is so sad and heartbreaking since Mina went through something similar.

I adore how thoughtful Mina is about everything. How considerate she is when it comes Dan and the loss of his family. The scene where Dan is teaching Mina how to swim is so sweet and so tender and I love it.

I'm subscribing and recommending because I think that this is an awesome story and completely original. :) Great job!

This is great so far. They are both such interesting characters and something about the way you write already has me on edge. I can't wait for more.

Oh, my holy cheese-balls, this is amazing. I love the way you write and I'm completely in lust with this story. The prologue was just perfect and the first chapter established the characters amazingly. I can tell that this is going to be an absolute masterpiece. Update soon!

Man! You seriously know how to write one hell of a summary.
When I opened this story for the free comment you asked me for, I was like, "Okay, what have I gotten myself into?"
THANK YOU for blowing my mind with this awesome piece of literature. Haha
I subscribed and recommended this, so I can continue to follow this and so other people will hopefully do the same. Whatever you do, do not give up on this, it is seriously going to rock. I can already feel it in my bones. It touched me that he told her that he should be the one thanking her. It helps me see how she tells the cop in the beginning that no matter what he did, he was her father. Yes, I'm tearing up a little, don't judge me.

*here from your comment swap blog*

Oh my goodness, this is great! As a criminal justice major, I love anything crime related. You're writing style is really good and well developed and I love your description of Mina! I really liked this! An gonna subscribe for sure!

can't wait to read more x

@ Snow.White.Queen. @ poisoned tea.

I definitely see where you guys are coming from when it comes to using the term "murderer" instead, but the way Mina finds out gives her immediate evidence that he is, in fact, a serial killer. Just wait and see and it'll all make sense. But thank you for suggesting that. :)

Wow! Your writing is so vivid that I feel like she's someone I've known my entire life. The chapter didn't seem too long to me before I knew it the chapter was over and I was craving more. I kind of like the term serial killer more than murderer. Anyone to me can be a murderer it takes a really sick individual to be a serial killer. I don't know it that makes sense or not, but I watch too many crime shows.

This is going to be awesome. I can just tell.

I'm here from your comment swap blog.

I'm really liking this so far! The way you've described Mina is excellent, it's so detailed and makes me fell like I actually know her. I'm pretty much hooked. That chapter was long, but it was needed I guess.
I got a little emotional when I read about her being so excited to leave with Dan.

I can't see any obvious grammar mistakes or spelling ones, so that's always good. Like silk tea. said before me though, I dislike the way you said serial killer. Maybe you should change to murderer?

I think you've got a solid piece here, update soon!

So I actually really enjoy this. I usually never like realistic fiction but this kept me hooked throughout the entire thing. I actually got a bit teary eyed when Mina was getting so excited to leave with Dan. I can't even imagine how that must feel and when her dad killed herself. Man, broke my heart. The only complaint I have is your use of the word serial killer, I just feel like it's out of place. Like serial killer is such a clinical term and I feel like that calling him a murderer sounds better and when you find out the way he kills people then she can put serial killer to him...I don't know, that's just me though.

Comment swap :
Oh my god! I love this story so far. I love how you have made her stay loyal to her dad. And that there is the background to her story as well. I was hooked before reading any of the chapters. The one chapter is long but it was needed. I love your style of writing. One new subscriber here :D

Umm the one I would like you to read in particular is the fault within us please.

Also update soon!!!

Oh wow, I'm really loving this so far!
The way you described Mina and her situation is really good and I seriously can't wait to read more

Love it! update soon!!