Without You I'm Nothing - Comments

  • RaeChellie

    RaeChellie (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    35
    Location:
    United States
    A mistake in chapter 2 really stood out to me, and that's when you said that a flight from New York to Atlanta would be 13 hours, when it's really only 2 hours or so.
    June 23rd, 2013 at 05:44pm
  • The Detective

    The Detective (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    26
    Location:
    United States
    @ AkaraSoma
    Well hopefully I am good at writing it, cause whenever I write smut, nobody tells me if it was good or bad. But the fight seen might have some sex in it.

    @ Maddy120296
    I love that video, just because Sean could pass for a gay guy and it's just hilarious. I love it when he says " I can't moonwalk, honey bunch. I can't walk backwards!"
    June 21st, 2013 at 05:52pm
  • Mad1212

    Mad1212 (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    28
    Location:
    Australia
    I've seen that video OMG it was HILARIOUS!!! And I can't wait for more Normy haha
    June 21st, 2013 at 06:46am
  • AkaraSoma

    AkaraSoma (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    32
    Location:
    United States
    @ Miakoda
    I'd say do the fight scene and then the sex chapter.
    And smut is easy to write (even though I've bee writing a DarylOC sex chapter that is over 4000 words long, just not all smut, and I've been working on it for a week). It's all about writing what you're comfortable with, using some of your own insight/fantasies, and keeping the characters in character.
    I think you'll be fine =)
    June 21st, 2013 at 06:05am
  • The Detective

    The Detective (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    26
    Location:
    United States
    @ AkaraSoma
    lol, I am trying to figure out if I want to make the next chapter a fight between the Sean and Kenzi or if I want it to be a sex chapter. Cause I don't think I'm all that great at writing sex, but I'm good at writing fight scenes. I'm just not sure what to make the third chapter, so If you've got any Ideas please share. I love his Beauregard Parish voice, it's hilarious. and I loved it too.
    June 21st, 2013 at 02:57am
  • AkaraSoma

    AkaraSoma (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    32
    Location:
    United States
    Oh lord the Beauregard Parish voice xD
    I loved this little thing they did!
    June 21st, 2013 at 02:55am
  • AkaraSoma

    AkaraSoma (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    32
    Location:
    United States
    @ Miakoda
    I have the same problem some times so I'm used to seeing it lol
    I just flip out about once I go back to look at it xD
    June 21st, 2013 at 02:50am
  • The Detective

    The Detective (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    26
    Location:
    United States
    ok, I'll try to keep that in mind :) I'm just not good at breaking it up into paragraphs. Sometimes I'll get so enveloped in writing that i'll forget to write new paragraphs and what should be like ten paragraphs is one. but thank you for the advice.
    June 21st, 2013 at 01:59am
  • AkaraSoma

    AkaraSoma (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    32
    Location:
    United States
    I like it so far, but have one small bit of advice:
    When someone new is speaking and when the subject changes, make a new paragraph.
    It'll make the story flow better and it won't look so blocky, ya know?
    I really do love it so far =)
    June 21st, 2013 at 01:09am