Look Straight At Me - Comments

Wow.....amazing<3
I just found this, it's truly amazing
So different and ... just amazing. I'm speechless <3

thats amazing, your writing is so AMAZINGLY discriptive. you can totally ge the mood from the fantastic range of vocabulary in here
DONT STOP

Shit.

I don't have a clue what to say, that was awesome :]

I dont usually read My Chem stories so for someone like me to say that it's a big thing

Fucking hell, you're one hell of a writer, i mean it.

xxx

CONTINUE THIS! I'm SCRIBING, okay?! This is choice.

(Y)

This is.
Incredible. :con: :con:

Instead of using everday, universal nouns and adjectives,
you went all the way and used adjectives and nouns I've never heard in my entire life. :shifty

I say,
continue this.
because I am about to go and subscribe to this.
:weird :weird :weird :weird

UM.

Scream.

Gasp.

Choke.

The four white walls are anything but fucking innocent; a faint red residue clings to the scratched paint stained in rusty patches, darker along the deep gouges left where the claws of past monsters sunk desperately into the walls, grasping hopelessly for escape or salvation.

...

...And so on :]]]]!

There is something about the way you write... something magic, but magic in a completely original way. You're obviously the queen of trashy gorgeous brilliance such as this, and the way you describe things is just... breathtaking.

I saw his eyes – laced with salt and tarnished – as they dragged him towards the curb, the edges of the waiting taxi gleaming white in the sunlight like the lid of a closed casket, dangerous, bitter, glossy with shellac. Grey irises shone electric with fear, blinding against the meningitis-red of his bloodshot sclera like iridescent reflections collecting in the hunted stare of an animal in crosshairs. His eyelashes were knotted and tangled from all the tears, and they cast spiky dark triangles onto his cheekbones as he twisted in the grip of the officers, mouth open wide like a bloody cave-in with all the effort it took to keep screaming my name.

AGAIN WITH THE DISCRIPTION. ARGH.

When you describe anything I get goosebumps EVERYWHERE, and I mean everywhere, but something I've picked up on after reading quite alot of your work is how well you describe parts of the body, eyes in particular.

It must sound strange for me to be complimenting you on how well you write about peoples' eyes, but there you go x] Seriously though. Every word is so captivating, I simply couldn't stop reading.

The laughter got louder as I flushed, but no one could have known what he really meant.

That fucking serpent was about to strike.

ELIZA-FUCKING-BETH.

I love it and I love you and I wish I started reading this story sooner.

You little genius, you

:arms: :arms: :arms:

I finally got around to reading the whole chapter :]

:cheese:

Okay, so you’re the best person ever for updating this.

First off, let me tell you that I found it EXTREMELY hard to pick out my favorite pieces from this chapter, considered the whole thing is fucking brill. BUT, I’d have to say a line I really liked was:

“But he was the real fucking serpent, winding around Eve and Adam’s calves in the garden with the temptation of ripe fruit, sweet cherry-red that runs down your jaw and your bare thighs and your shoulder blades, that courses through every swollen vein like heroin or liquid sin.”

That paragraph up there was pure, fucking, genius.
Seriously. It was just so poetic, and it flowed so smoothly. And, it’s damn incredible that you can create things like this, and write words as amazing as these. They blow me away, most of the time. Anyway, back to the paragraph, I especially loved the ending, ”…courses through every swollen vein like heroin or liquid sin.” Being completely serious, that line made me shiver. :]]

Oh, and this is another line that fucking blew me away:

“…white eyes rolling around like plastic dice in their gaping sockets.”

Jesus, you always amaze me with your incredible metaphors.

Hopefully this comment makes sense. I had to rush, ‘cos I need to be off the computer soon.
:]

<33

This is an amazing story.
Even by only three chapters, I can tell it's big. Bigger than big. It's huge. Well done.
I love the style you write with, the way you describe things gives a different meaning to the word, Magnificent.
Update soon, or I fear, I will go insane.

Wow, this is an amazing story.
Tad confusing *cough* but that's probably because I'm retarded. x]

No, seriously, it's amazing. You have an amazing writing style and so much discription!

Ok, so there's nothing else I'd like to do right now then to read over your whole story, and review it properly. Buut, I'm currently sneaking on to my dad's computer 'cos mine is broken, so I don't have time.



So as soon as I get it fixed, I'm gonna read this.

<3

Holy crap, that was awesome!
Im really happy you updated this, it took so long =[
but it's definitely worth it!
More when you can?
<33

I love it!
It's amazing.
Update when you can.
I love how you describe things.
Well good.
Daryl xoxo

Edit: Page Claim!
I think I shall name isWowza, to match this story!

wow, that was so beautifully written O.O
the way you describe things is absolutely amazing, I love it!
please write more soon ^.^

oh i need more!!!! i have to know what happens and u dont seem to update this one very much :(

pleeeeeeeeeaaaaaase i fall on my knees and beg u to update soon. this is just amazing

This is incredible. And amazing and all of those other adjectives.
More soon?

Whoo! Love it *subscribes*
leaves little to the imagination
love all the fucking metaphors!
can't wait for an update

Incredibly well-written, my dear.

*subscribes*

I laughed at a few analogies of yours, but they were suited well for the way you let your words flow into each other.

Overall, a fantastic work to be had.
*nods*

OMG SQUEEE!! I am so happy you got through it! Amazing chapter as usual. Wee I love it I love itand I am soglad you are back with this story. I am going to write a shitty review because I am really tired for some reason. But fucking amazing!

I'm going to try better. If I can. Your imagery with Parker was just breathtaking. Shit. And your contrast with Gerard, him the serpent that coiled around the thighs of Adam and Eve. It was beautiful and sinister, but in a sense, romantic in its evil. I have always been attracted to the serpent of the bible story, and this just hightened my curiosity of Gerard. I just cant wait to see what you are going to do with this story. *giggles madly*

i love it!
this is one of my favorite stories of yours i've decided! there's something about this that just really works and its really well written.
<3 <3

are you writting more? if u are, more SOON please

I love this already! Write more please!