Just stumbled upon this story. I love how it’s starting out. Hope to read more soon.
May 8th, 2018 at 05:42pm
Layout / Summary
The layout for this is really cute! I love the little banner around the edge, it's really nice with the dark against the light background. The summary contains a lot of information and leaves me absolutely clear on what I'm signing into when I start reading.
Content
I honestly don't think I've read a story about princesses that starts with the princess going away from the castle. It's really interesting because it normally takes a while for them to move away from the 'royalty' aspect of it and I feel like having Bella go to Rose Ranch right away kind of gives us more of a grasp on her true character, as opposed to the one that she would probably put on whilst at the castle. It's a really nice touch right away, and it's one that, as I said above, I don't think I've seen before. Another part of that is the modernism of everything. When I think of princesses and royalty, I always think of the 'ye olde worlde' aspect of it. I didn't even think how it would be to be a princess in a world with social media and the suchlike. Super-interesting concept!
Ah, and when James jumps in and acts all nonchalant and outlandish, I love it. That's exactly what somebody who lives by such rigid rules within a royal family needs. I can't wait to see where this goes. I assume Bella is going to be with her aunt and uncle for a while, so it'll be interesting to see romance bud and how it'll affect her when she eventually has to go back, because I assume that she will. I can't wait to learn more about James' character though, he seems like he'll be a great person already from the brief introduction we get to him!
Concrit
The only thing I picked up on was in the line Being princess, her face was all over everything -- I think there should be an 'a' in front of 'princess' as it stunts the flow of the sentence a little. Other than that, nothing major jumped out at me!
Overall
I like this. It's different, and it's pretty unique. You write well, and the characters already seem to be fleshing out well even within the first chapter. I hope to see more soon!