Less Children - Comments

The first chapter was really horrible, emotionally. It's great to see that she can still be happy after that.

I particularly like Sage and her personality.

I subscribed. :cute:
[Oh and I'm going to go check out your other stories sometime this week when I have more time.]

amazing. the story line itself is.. undescribable.
i've never read such plot on mibba, well.. i've read.. the fanfics kind..
but this, this is pure amazing.

It reminds me of Juno is some ways, but other than that..
I love it. Beautiful. Women in this story you potray
are strong(emotionally) and intelligent in ways of their own.

.. you must update :D

I loved the chapter. The beautiful descriptions of the picnic, the masculine characters being so..gentleman-like.

damn i gotta start checking back here more often for updates.
i liked the last chapter =] it made me happy. finally she's enjoying herself and starting to settle in.
i'm glad her friends haven't forced her to talk or anything. i love how they're unassuming and just enjoy her company. those are probably the best friends anyone could ever have.
i think they're doing a lot more to heal sophie then therapy sessions and medication ever could.
=)
and i just read the comment above here, and i'm not gonna lie, i only though about the kids were gonna have to be mature and not really be children since they had teeenaged parents. it didnt even occur to me about how the parents are children themselves, and have to turn into adults.
damn girl, you're deep. lol.
i love it!

maduza:

Thething I pnder is why it's "less children" if there seem to bee mroe soon. Unless something happeens? Hmmm...

It's a figure of speech. Less because by having a baby, these children turn into adults, and also because their infants may not have a conventional childhood, and they may be forced to mature much earlier.

Thething I pnder is why it's "less children" if there seem to bee mroe soon. Unless something happeens? Hmmm...

New reader. Not sure what to comment about this, but it's good. :)

Fantastic update! And don't apologise for the length, it;'s gooood =D

Every night though, as dark hugged the earth, a layer of dark was laid upon Sophia’s heart and mind too.
^ I love that line, it's so poetic =)

Aw and I'm so glad that she met people in a slightly similar situation... I love all the different characters you're introducing, and you write beautifully

more soon!

xoxox

i love how powerful this story is. honestly.
chapter 3 rocked my world. it was amazing.
and i'm not going to lie, it made me stop and think. i don't encounter pregnant teens at my school all that often, but it made me wonder how i would respond to the situation. most certainly not like the stupid cunt in the story (yes i have developed a strong hatred for her; i sense more trouble coming from her direction) but it really made me stop and think.
i'm so proud of sophie for being strong and not only keeping the child, but attempting to finish her education too. especially in a new town and school. that's crazy brave right there. *shakes head*
and yay! she made friends =) although i'm kind of confused on the couple; so their parents approve of the marriage? hmm i can't remember what the exact wording was, but i think it was the vocabulary that confused me.
and ooooooooooooooooooo i hope well-travelled cousin plays a bigger role ;] he sounds hot. lol ok ok i know. but i mean, i really do hope he helps sophie. she's struggling enough as it is and then to have to deal with personal relationships and physical as well as emotional proximity? hell that's a lot of crap to go through.
i love this story. i hope you got that ;P
more soonish please?
<3

Again =]
Me liked lol

The chapter was amazing.

No more words. :arms:

FINALLY i get around to comment IN the actual story itself lol. sorry about the delay.
...
u amaze me. every time. i love the way you write. it's so descriptive, yet so vague, if that makes sense. i love it.
and this story is just...wow. talk about powerful. and i love the little connotations everywhere, especially the comment about the people who would judge her.
and the thoughts in her head are ones that are so realistic. i mean, i've thought about those too (not that i've been in this situation) but i mean, in regards to letting an innocent child live or die...just...yeah.
bah i'm loving this story! make sure u msg me to tell me when u update this!

I finally read it. It's totally rad. [=blana :lmfao ]

Can't wait for more. I've been missing you. :arms:

Oh that was really good update soon =]

Wow, I really like this! You write it really well, an some parts are really quite beautiful

more soon?

xoxox

thank you, toilet paper.:arms:
Now. Sophia's personality and inner conflict will surface more, but I didn't wanna have a first chapter the size of a few chapters.:) So that will probably be happeningin chapter two, which is bound to be published soon.

A street light shone, somewhere, not too far away, sending little pieces of light through the thick rain. Water hovered its way to the pavement and jumped a bit up.

I don't know about this, it kind of makes me think of something totally unreal... I don't imagine heavy rain, but rather thick drizzle that hovers constantly. And then I think of grasshoppers. This could just be me following a possibly demented train of thought, though?

I like a few aspects of this... it seems almost pure. While the subject obviously isn't, the way you've written it is. I do like the way Sophia isn't your average, miserable emo kid but I kind of want to know more about her thoughts... she seems too pure, too "this is the perfect kid". It's almost like a myth to me. I envision a different world altogether, which could possibly be what you're trying to do? I don't know. But for Sophia, it must have been a totally unreal occurence...

You're a good writer, I just feel like something is missing. You should probably ignore me because I can't think exactly what (no evidence to back up my 'point ^_^), but when (or if, brain waves aren't reliable when I'm concerned) I come up with something, I'll comment again.

I want to subscribe, though, 'cause I'm curious about what's going to happen and it's just the prologue, so, erm... yeah, I'll subscribe and you can roll your eyes when I try and form a decent comment ^_^