Forbidden to Remember
Chapter Sixteen: Secrets Are Revealed
A few days passed and everything seemed to be getting back to normal. I was feeling better and Kellan was acting like himself again, but I knew that for not much longer could I keep the fact from Kellan that I had lost a baby, our baby, his baby. I knew it was going to crush him, because he loves kids and couldn’t wait to have his own but he needed to know.
I decided that I would tell him one night when things were settled again and we both weren‘t busy or getting ready to leave for either tour or to go to a photo shoot or work of any kind. He came over after I called and I had him sit down. Then I also made him promise that no matter what he wouldn’t get mad. Of course he promised but I knew he was going to either leave and take off for a little while or explode at me then take off for a little while.
I spaced for a second thinking on how I was word how I was going to tell him. “ Lily baby what’s going on?” he asked bring back down to earth.
“Kellan there’s something I need to tell you,” I said to him he nodded and took my hands in his. “When I was in the accident I lost more then just my memory that day.” I said slowly and softly. He gave me a look that told me he didn’t understand.
“I…” I slipped one hand from his and covered his mouth.
“Let me explain,” I said. He nodded. “ As you know the reason I left in the first place was to get something to eat,” he nodded. “I went out to get pancakes. I don’t like or eat pancakes.” he nodded, my hand was still over his mouth. He knew I didn’t like them. “A few weeks after I got my memory back Val told me something that was heart shattering. She told me that I had not only lost my memory but that before the accident I was…” he brought his hand up to my mouth.
“I know.” he whispered. “I knew you were pregnant before the accident and that you lost the baby. The doctor told me.” I stared at him. “I was waiting for you to say something to me.” I nodded against his hand. He took his hand away and replaced it with his lips. I kissed back and wrapped my arms around his neck.
“I love you.” I whispered against his lips as tears raced down my cheeks.
“I love you too, more now then yesterday and less then tomorrow.” I smiled against his lips as I kissed him again. He slipped one around my middle and the other under my legs getting up from the couch and carrying me to my bedroom. I didn’t stop kissing him even when he placed me on my bed. I didn’t want to let go so with our lips still connected her crawled on top of me. I wrapped my legs around him. He pulled away from me a little again and asked me something that I was surprised I answered so quickly to. “Want to try again?”
“Yes.” I told him staring into his eyes deeply.
He gently took me shit off and held me to him. He told me I was beautiful which made me smile and kiss him. He was going slow. I loved it when he did this. It was so romantic.
Everything moved slowly but quickly. He was soon thrusting in me, and it felt like every nerve in my body was feeling him. Everything was sensitive to him and I only wanted more. Of course that’s what he gave me, just more and more until that exciting feeling builds up in your lower stomach to the point that you tip over the edge and dive head first into ecstasy.
He laid down next to me pulling me as close as possible and wrapping us both up in my blanket. I snuggled to his chest drawing little circles against his skin, he kissed my forehead and I could feel his whole body relax even more and fall asleep. Which then I did the same.
When I woke up, I was laying on my side, a corner of the blanket was draped over my lower half and I felt alone. I rolled over and indeed I was. I slipped off my bed and pulled on some panties and one of my favorite’s of Kellan’s t-shirts. I walked out and Kellan was standing in the kitchen cutting up something, when I got closer it was some lettuce. I smiled when I seen he was wearing only an apron.
“Good morning.” I went over and wrapped my arms around him.
“It’s afternoon babe.” he corrected me. I shrugged my shoulders and kissed right between his shoulder blades. “Hungry?”
“Yea, you always make me work up an appetite.” he chuckled.
He made us dinner, we eat and went back to bed.
I decided that I would tell him one night when things were settled again and we both weren‘t busy or getting ready to leave for either tour or to go to a photo shoot or work of any kind. He came over after I called and I had him sit down. Then I also made him promise that no matter what he wouldn’t get mad. Of course he promised but I knew he was going to either leave and take off for a little while or explode at me then take off for a little while.
I spaced for a second thinking on how I was word how I was going to tell him. “ Lily baby what’s going on?” he asked bring back down to earth.
“Kellan there’s something I need to tell you,” I said to him he nodded and took my hands in his. “When I was in the accident I lost more then just my memory that day.” I said slowly and softly. He gave me a look that told me he didn’t understand.
“I…” I slipped one hand from his and covered his mouth.
“Let me explain,” I said. He nodded. “ As you know the reason I left in the first place was to get something to eat,” he nodded. “I went out to get pancakes. I don’t like or eat pancakes.” he nodded, my hand was still over his mouth. He knew I didn’t like them. “A few weeks after I got my memory back Val told me something that was heart shattering. She told me that I had not only lost my memory but that before the accident I was…” he brought his hand up to my mouth.
“I know.” he whispered. “I knew you were pregnant before the accident and that you lost the baby. The doctor told me.” I stared at him. “I was waiting for you to say something to me.” I nodded against his hand. He took his hand away and replaced it with his lips. I kissed back and wrapped my arms around his neck.
“I love you.” I whispered against his lips as tears raced down my cheeks.
“I love you too, more now then yesterday and less then tomorrow.” I smiled against his lips as I kissed him again. He slipped one around my middle and the other under my legs getting up from the couch and carrying me to my bedroom. I didn’t stop kissing him even when he placed me on my bed. I didn’t want to let go so with our lips still connected her crawled on top of me. I wrapped my legs around him. He pulled away from me a little again and asked me something that I was surprised I answered so quickly to. “Want to try again?”
“Yes.” I told him staring into his eyes deeply.
He gently took me shit off and held me to him. He told me I was beautiful which made me smile and kiss him. He was going slow. I loved it when he did this. It was so romantic.
Everything moved slowly but quickly. He was soon thrusting in me, and it felt like every nerve in my body was feeling him. Everything was sensitive to him and I only wanted more. Of course that’s what he gave me, just more and more until that exciting feeling builds up in your lower stomach to the point that you tip over the edge and dive head first into ecstasy.
He laid down next to me pulling me as close as possible and wrapping us both up in my blanket. I snuggled to his chest drawing little circles against his skin, he kissed my forehead and I could feel his whole body relax even more and fall asleep. Which then I did the same.
When I woke up, I was laying on my side, a corner of the blanket was draped over my lower half and I felt alone. I rolled over and indeed I was. I slipped off my bed and pulled on some panties and one of my favorite’s of Kellan’s t-shirts. I walked out and Kellan was standing in the kitchen cutting up something, when I got closer it was some lettuce. I smiled when I seen he was wearing only an apron.
“Good morning.” I went over and wrapped my arms around him.
“It’s afternoon babe.” he corrected me. I shrugged my shoulders and kissed right between his shoulder blades. “Hungry?”
“Yea, you always make me work up an appetite.” he chuckled.
He made us dinner, we eat and went back to bed.