When Forever Ends

It just figures that Ace screws up with Shayne. He’s completely clueless when it comes to females. Or maybe it’s that he doesn’t look at Shayne as a female. It’s one of the two. Either way, he storms back into Marley’s house with this pissed off face. His body gave away his angry expression. He threw himself down and slumped in the chair regretting whatever he said outside...because obviously Shayne hadn’t came back inside with him.

Honestly, I want him to leave. I want to be alone with Marley. It’s sort of uncomfortable to say everything I want to say to her with Ace sitting there watching our every move. I nodded my head to the side, silently telling Ace to leave.

“I’m going. Thanks for trying, Marley.” he says grimly. Marley smiles sympathetically at him. Marley walks with him to the door.

“Here.” Marley holds up a Shayne’s torn apart black backpack to Ace. Ace takes the bag with a bewildered expression. God, this kid is slow. “Take her the bag. Don’t assume things. Let her explain things.” Marley says slowly and shoves a GPS at Ace. I understand why she takes it out of her car. No one wants their car broken into. “Go to favorites and then pick Shayne’s.” Marley said.

“Thanks.” Ace says and scurries out the door.

Marley turns to me with her arms crossed and an expectant look on her face. I thought she had caved already. Obviously I’m not getting away. “Well.” she says.

I take a deep breath and exhale. “I’m an asshole and I’m sorry. I was scared. I shouldn’t have said all that shit that I said. I didn’t mean any of it. I just...freaked out.” I rush my sentences together. “I’m really really sorry for what I did.” I add.

Marley stares at me not angry but not happy either. It’s killing me. I want the whole occurrence of me acting the way I did to disappear. I’m ashamed of the way I acted. Just because my dad was a screw up doesn’t mean I’m going to be a screw up. Well, if the baby is even mine.

Marley nods, biting her lip.

I reach out towards her. I rest my hands on her hips. “I’ve been screwed without you.” I whisper to her. Screwed is an understatement. I’ve been fucked up without her. She’s always on my mind. “I miss you.” I say pulling her into my arms. God, I missed her. “I love you.” I tell her and kiss her hair.

“I love you too.” Marley responds and relaxes in my arms. Without thinking a meet my lips with Marley’s. It felt amazing to kiss her after a year without her in my life. A cry filled the air. Marley pulls away.

“No.” I whine pulling her back to me.

“I have to.” Marley says after detaching our lips. I give in when the crying increases in volume. I trail behind Marley. I want to see this baby. I don’t care if it’s Dylan’s and not mine. I’m going to act like it’s dad. I’m going to be a good dad. I’m not going to fuck up this kid’s life like my dad did to me.

Marley flicks on the lights in the small room painted pink. Marley leans over the crib and picks up the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen. She looks nothing like Dylan, and not too much like Marley. The more I look at her she looks like me when I was a baby.

“Her name is Gia.” Marley says to me. Gia. I love it. My smile is uncontrollable. Gia is without a doubt my daughter. How can I not smile when I’m looking at my daughter for the first time. Guilt hit me full force when I look into the big teary eyes of my daughter. I should have been there when she was born. I should have been there when she laughed for the first time, when she sneezed for the first time, when she crawled for the first time.

“I’m sorry.” I say again as Marley hands me Gia. I hold her for the first time. She blinks at me, and then reaches for my hair and begins to pull on it. It hurts, I’m not going to lie. I pull a face, trying to keep my pain undercover. Gia erupts with laughter as I screw my face up in pain.

“I probably should have warned you about that.” Marley says grinning.

I smile down at the curly haired baby in my arms. “It’s okay. I don’t care.” I say. I’m never going to care. I’ll put myself through the worst pain in the world if it makes Gia smile. She has me wrapped around her tiny little finger already. I am never going to leave them.