Killing Joy

“Really? I mean for fucking real??” I heard Beth shrieked from other line while we were phoning. I backed to the bedroom clinging my ear to my cellphone. I was bored. Really fucking bored, I dunno what to do that day. It seemed my day was bounded ever since I got married. If only I was still Ms. Barakat, I would still play around in my big house and hang out with my besties. Or maybe I would have a mother-daughter’s day out.

“Yeah Beth.. jeez!” I said to her after I told her about the thing happened with Caleb and those chicks.

“Euww.. Im afraid you’ll get STD from him”

My eyes were widened, “WHAT!! What do you mean, huh??”

“Uhhmm..” Beth responded

“Euww.. I WILL NEVER EVER HAVE SLEPT WITH THIS GUY! EUW! Oh my God, you’re so horrible, Beth.. picturing me shacking up with Caleb. DAMMIT!”

I heard Beth giggled. “Sowie, baby.. just.. well.. you both are husband and wife so it isn’t wrong if you both.. hmm..”

“Beth!”

“Alright alright!” she giggled once again “But, I admit that he’s hot, Nicky, you know sooner or later maybe you would fall for him”

“Beth!” I glared

“He’s decent eventhough is a bitch. You know, he’s a hot manwhore, and he’s nice to me, Nicks. If you keep refusing this approaching fallen angel, I’m sure you-re—“

“BETHANY!!!” I screamed out loud as I swore maybe the naked couple would hear me.

“Nicky stop calling my name, I’m not deaf” I could see Beth smirking followed by my groan. Beth chuckled and then I just shot my profanities to her. “Kay, forget about Caleb, let’s talk about anyone else”

“Hmm?”

“Zachary Merrick!!”

“What??” I arched my eyebrows together at her squeal; I didn’t know what came to her so she could talk about Zach in sudden.

“Zach.. the Merr.. you know..”

“What happen to him? I don’t get you, Beth” I managed to talk as innocent as I could

“Oh come on, me and Mich are already figuring it out! Don’t lie through your teeth, honey” she then chuckled “You like him!”

“WHAT!!” I shrieked. “What do you mean, Beth?”

“Nichole Penelope, stop lying. I have already known about it, just spill the beans about your date”

“Wait a second! How come you know about our date?” I said in astonishment

“WHOA!! SO YOU REALLY DATE HIM!! OH MY GOD!” Beth suddenly shrieked. I didn’t know why she shrieked, she said she already knew that we were dating. Uhh.. I mean, not really dating. HEY! Beth tricked me.

“BETHANY! You tricked me!” I whined

“OH seriously, Nicky?! You date him??” Beth giggled “Geez, you’re such a cheater wife”

I rolled my eyes and sighed, “No Beth.. I mean it’s not like we are really dating. We—“

“Hold up, Mich wants to join in” then Beth clicked another phone line.

“HEY GUYSSSS!!!” suddenly a girl’s scream came through the line which made my ear went dead.

“Holy fuck Michaela! It’s not like we’re deaf”

“Oops sorry” Michaela said giddily. “So Nicky, you’re dating Zach for real?!”

“No guys” I groaned, “Well, let me get this straight. We are not dating, we are just going to watch movie together”

“So, you’re seeing him?” Beth asked curiously

“Bethany.. oh please. We’re JUST hanging out”

Mich and Beth chuckled, “Right on. But, do you like him??”

I scoffed a little, “What am I suppose to answer that? Of course I like him. I like you both, I like Alex, I like Jack, I like everyone who doesn’t act like a bitch”

I heard Mich groaned, “I mean… hmm.. let’s say.. from 1 to 10, how much you like him?”

I couldn’t help but smile, I thought it was just a ridiculous question. “I don’t know, guys. I just can’t put my finger on. Yet” I giggled

“Awww.. I heard you, girl. You’re so into this guy” Beth chimed in

“No I’m not” I came back to laugh

“Hmmmm.. Our little Nicky finally moves on, eh?” for some reasons, after Mich said that, a face came through my mind. The face of my ex that I hated to remind. I liked him, A LOT. But as I told you, so many boys who had already known my status tried to play me. Just as a toy. They loved to waste my money or grope my body. That’s all. But even this guy did that, I liked him really much. I couldn’t stop thinking of him. He’s the reason I hadn’t been moving on to another guy.

Guys are just wasted, we broke up. I caught him cheating on me with a new version of slutty Barbie girl in the school. They were making out in the gym closet. Renee, my bestfriend told me to check out the gym closet. I always argued with her about this guy. She said this guy never loved me, he cheated on me. But I never believed her before I saw it with myself.

I was in deep broken heart when I found out him trying to fuck that barbie girl. It took my heart out. I ran back to my dorm and wanted to fork out my eyes from their casket when I cried.

Renee tried to comfort me. And at the weekend, after I told Beth by email, Beth and Mich came to my dorm. They did the same thing like Renee did. They said it would be alright. Since that day, I’d been skipping school just for avoiding him.

But finally I could manage that, Renee convinced me that she would stuck up with me when I got broken again in front of him.
He’s stuck on my head. And I was scared to make a new relationship. I’m scared that boys would turn like him
You may question me about how about Zach? Am I scared of him.

Well, I didn’t know why. But it felt different when I was around him.
I might take a shot with Zach. In case he turned like my ex, hmm.. i think I would tell my bro. I believed Jack would help me out and beat Zach up although he’s Jack’s bestfriend. At least I knew someone who could protect me when Zach made any waves with me.
But underline this, I thought Zach was poles apart from I’d imagined. He’s really nice. And quiet. I wasn’t sure he would whore himself like my exes did to me. Like Jack said, Zach was kinda introverted himself before he met me.

“I knew it! Since you kissed him in the pool! I knew it I knew it!!” Beth said vigorously

“Beth, it’s not like that. Well, uhh.. I didn’t know what came to me in that pool, my conscious forced me to kiss him. i..” I was speechless

“WHAT!! NICKY YOU KISSED HIM ALREADY??” Mich suddenly shrieked

“Beth, you haven’t told her, huh?”

“Nope.. sorry Mich..”

“Aww.. you are suck! I hate you” Mich responded as I could picture her pouting so hard.

I giggled, “It’s just nothing, Mich. Well, Jack and Alex had a stupid game holding your breath under the water. The winner would be kissed by Beth first, but Jack raised the bid. They would end up kissing me. Then.. Zach came as a winner. Well, you know what happened next”

“Just so you know, Mich. It’s not a friendly kiss! THEY MADE OUT!” Beth added

“Beth! No.. like I said—“ I defended

“You always deny that you’re into him, huh?”

I grunted, “Have your way, Bethany Taylor” then Beth and Mich giggled.

“Anyway, Nicky.. how about Caleb. You’re married to him. What if your mom found out?” Mich asked

I scoffed, “Found out about what? You mean what if she caught Caleb fucked another girl and then caught her daughter had a thing with another guy? It means a lot to me, Mich. So I’d have a reason to break up with him. I would so happy looking forward it. You know I never loved Caleb, I was forced to marry him”

“I know, but… hmm.. your mom expects so much with your marriage with Caleb, right? Isn’t it meanie if you just threw your marriage? I know you don’t love him, but for what it’s been your mom has done with your life, wouldn’t you at least make her happy? She’s really happy with you and Caleb. I caught that glance, dude… she’s freaking happy”

I was spaced out for a moment. I hated to admit that Mich was definitely right. My mom had never force me into anything before this. She always gave me what I needed as long as it dealt with my academic things, not that party things or drugs or drinks. She always banned me for that thingee because I wasn’t legal. Far from that, my mom still gave me a limitation for shopping and have fun with the credit cards.

“Uhhmm” I had no idea what to say

I heard Mich exhaled loudly, “I’m so envious. While you have a hot husband, you have a hot date too.. oh my god..” Mich squealed

“Mich, I’m not dating Zach.. yet? Uhh.. well yesterday, I met him and then he said something about a movie. He has asked Jack and Alex to watch it, but they didn’t want it. And so, he asked me to watch this movie. This Friday. That’s all. I don’t think it’s counted as a date”

“Oh really?” Mich responded with a teasing tone “Well good luck, then”

“So you and Caleb will choose your own way, huh?” Beth asked

“Yeah.. but please don’t tell anyone about this. You know we don’t love each other so why don’t we choose our date”

“Right… hmm.. well Nicky good luck with your Friday Night then” Beth said finally as I curved a grin on my lips.

“Kay..”

We continued to chat about another thing and then it ended after Caleb walked into the room. I clicked off my cellphone and shot a look to him. his eyes were still in bloodshot and grinned fooly at me.

“Sup?” he said scratching his head

“I was just sitting on the bed while I wait for SOMEONE to make me a meal but unfortunately he forgot about it and shacked up with some slutty girl”

“Oops.. sorry.. I forgot about that. So, you’re still hungry?”

I shook my head and pointed the empty cookie jar on the end table.

“ohh..” he said at last. I groaned and threw him a pillow in annoyance even I knew it looked so immature with pouting on my lips.

XXX