Killing Joy

The next day, I couldn’t see Caleb anywhere in the house. Jonathan said he’s attempting with Dani and I had feeling they would make up soon. Despite of listening to Teresa, I already registered the separation. The court would be in the next week, and it’d be my last day being a Mrs. Turman.

I was in living room, the house was totally desert up than the day before. Teresa was totally upset with my choice, I know she was. Teresa chose to have a discussion about the divorcement with my mom in her room. I was there in living room with Nick in my hand, and he’s been getting the breast feeding from me.

The moment later, the front door was opened. It revealed the rest of All Time Low who finally got chance to check my baby from their busy recording.

“Nicky!!!” Alex squealed when he spotted me on the couch. “Oh my fucking God, is this your baby!?!” he grinned when he saw Nick in my arm. “Fuck yes, he’s so cute!” he rubbed Nick’s tiny arm making Jack pouted on the couch in front of me. Rian and Zack were there too. Rian grinned happily when he was staring to the little angel.

“Alex can touch him!” Jack protested making me let out a weak chuckle. But I didn’t reply him. I watch Zack was standing next to me with his happy face.

He bent down in front of my legs, “Can I see the little Nicky? I can call him Nicky too, right?” he chuckled as he kissed Nick on forehead in fatherly way. He’s going to be his dad, anyway.

“Guys, I need a time with Zack.. can you leave us for a moment?” I spoke out. Alex, Rian and Jack exchanged look. Jack already understood this and nodded to me dragging the two boys from me. But before that, I asked Rian to hold on Nick and then the three boys plus the little boys came out from the living room leaving me only with Zack.

“Nick is so cute, I’m glad you finally brought him out” he commented as I nodded lightly to him “So what’s up, babe?” he arched his brows demanding my words.

“I’m sorry…” I bit my lower lip.

Zack looked puzzled, “For what?” he knitted his brows together.

“I realized that… that… I’m being a bitch girlfriend to you…” I started to sob.

“What? No… you’re my best girlfriend of all, baby. Why do you say that?”

I bit my lower lip not sure to tell him that actually I love Caleb. I inhaled deeply and shut my eyes as after that I exhaled and opened my eyes looking through his orbs.
“Because I love Caleb, and I practically cheated on you…”

Zack paused for a moment looking shocked about what I’d said to him. He tried to manage his words. “I know it” he muttered “I know it’s going to be happened soon,”

“Uhh.. Zack, I’m sorry” I said

Zack sighed deeply as he ran his fingers through his hair, “I’ve known it that you actually have some feelings for him” his face fell but quickly lit it up at me. “Do you love me, Nicky?”

I swallowed hard when he asked that. I honestly still didn’t know whether I loved him or not.

“Yes I do,” I said in hesitation

“Then what will you do? Who will you choose?” he gritted his teeth.

“Uh.. I..” I didn’t know what to say to him. “I don’t know, Zack…” I shut my eyes.

“Nicky…” Zack exhaled, “If you love both of us, you need to choose”

I opened my eyes and lit my head to him, “I’ve registered our separation, Zack”

Zack’s eyes lit up with hopes, “So it means, you choose me?”

My eyes fell down on his lips. He smiled and leaned forward giving me a gentle kiss on the lips. But I pulled away.

“I don’t know, Zack”

Zack frowned once again. “You.. ahh shit, you’re still unsure about it. Don’t say you choose Caleb, Nicks. I don’t know how to bear myself when I live without you”

“I don’t know about Caleb too, Zack!” I yelled. “I don’t know what I am supposed to do! I love you both! And Caleb said he loves me too! But he’s dating someone! It’s fucking complicated!”

Zack silenced for a moment while he was staring at me deeply. “But you’ve registered your divorcement, right? Doesn’t it mean, you’ll be mine? I’ve promised to marry you once you broke up with him. Nicky, I truly loved you. I will do anything to make you happy. And you’re happy when I was going to propose you”

“I don’t know Zack. I cant decide.. I’m really sorry. Maybe I’ll…” I paused

“You’ll what?”

“I’ll be a single parent for Nick. I will not choose anyone.. it hurts me a lot to break your heart if I choose Caleb because I love you very much, Zack. You’re like the best guy I’ve ever been with… you’re too nice to me. And somehow I felt like a bitch and don’t deserve you”

Zack sighed for the million times as he stood up, “I’ll leave it with you then… you need to think about it. But I just hope you could choose me, because no shit, I would be a wreck when I lost you. I’ll be losing my bearing” he said for the last time and the walked away from me toward the front door. “I’ll be at the coffee shop alone, if someone asked me” then he shut the front door.

XXX