How Was I Supposed To Know?

Brian

Closing the door behind me, sighing and wishing this was all different, I think... I love her but.... it isn't fair to my best friend. "Son of a bitch..." I hissed, suddenly consumed with a new emotion. Not exactly jealousy, maybe helplessness. Low laugh to my right caught my attention but only just.

Why the hell am I being so fucking emo?

I chided myself as the numb feeling pierced my heart, an emotion that oddly appeared whenever I wasn't with Alanna. Yet since we were sneaking around I felt relatively happy most of the time. Groaning, my fingers massaged my temples, this back and forth shit was giving me a sick headache.

"Yo Syn!" Zack called, I vaguely noticed we weren't in motion, Jimmy must have found a diner he liked. Zack appeared in my sights before I was ready. Ever since he got with Layla he's been Mr. Sunshine and Rainbows. Don't get me wrong I love to see my best friends happy but seriously sometimes it was a little nauseating. "What the hell are you doing in the dark, freak?" his voice wavered from its usual cheer to mild concern.

Sudden fear and or desperation. That's how I would describe it. That feeling where I long to tell someone about me and Alanna. Then of course I realize what would happen when Matt found out, and what could happen to the band. Almost painfully, I found a smile for my friend as I shoved him playfully. "Fuck off! Can't Layla be gone for five goddamn minutes before you come to check on her?" I teased.

He gave me the one fingered salute in response. "Seriously, Bri, what are you doing back here?"

"I was gonna take a piss if you don't mind, before I could do my thing your chick grabbed Alanna." I had been about to say my girl. But that was probably too much.

Satisfied with my lie, he shrugged easily. "When are you going to get a girl dude? I mean, Johnny's got Ri now and Liyah seems to be gettin' cozy with Jimmy. 'Course Matt has Alanna. Hate to see you on your own bro." Zack nudged me.

I barked out a laugh at how clueless he was. "I'm fine, better than I've been in a long time. I haven't heard from Michelle, the tour is going great and Christmas is right around the corner. Must be a holiday miracle huh?" I tried to lead us away from the bathroom and off the bus.

Zack followed but paused when he heard something. He raised his hand to silence me. For a moment all I heard was our friends arguing about whether or not the diner had good food then I heard it. That horrible sound when someone is puking out their guts.

Our eyes met and I wondered if the worried expression in his mirrored my own. "Hey are you ok?" Zack pounded on the flimsy door we were standing in front of moments ago. There was some shuffling around then flushing. "Y-yeah!" I couldn't be sure who squeaked out the response but they didn't sound sure.

"Open the door!" Zack was becoming frantic. Quiet whispering between the two girls made Zack and I press our ears against the door but all too soon the wood was pulled back. To avoid completely falling over we had to cling to each other. I'm not gonna lie it was pretty intense how close we were.

Alanna's face that normally seemed forever without a frown was etched with worry. Layla was rinsing her mouth out with the water from the tap. "Is she ok?" Zack whispered, suddenly scared.

"I'm fine, babe, I've just been nauseous. Probably just motion sickness or something." Layla wiped her mouth on a nearby towel. My mind automatically assumed she was pregnant. C'mon. She's been nauseous? Motion sickness? This is one of the first times she's thrown up all tour. Zack and Alanna seemed to be thinking the same thing. "Layla...." Zack started but saw her expression and backed off. Her eyes were suddenly wide and scared. "Don't you dare say I might be pregnant." she growled, but even I could tell it was from fear.

I gulped. Wasn't morning sickness only in the.... well.... morning? I slyly checked my watch, it was about 2:30.

Alanna took her hand and offered a shaky smile. "Of course not. Look let's just walk around outside. Maybe it is motion sickness." Layla gratefully smiled, leaning on her friend.

The two slowly got off the bus leaving me and Zack alone, questions in our eyes.

"You think.....?" Zack trailed off but I knew where he was going. I rubbed the back of my head to give my hands something to do. "Um well, were you wearing a condom?" I asked the obvious question, not entirely comfortable about asking my best friend something so.... I don't know......personal.

"I.... I don't remember. I think..... shit! How the fuck could I not remember!?" he yelled, his face going pale.

"Dude! Please relax!" I grabbed his arm and tried to get him to look at me seriously. "If it turns out Layla is preggers, what are you going to do?"

Everyone's heard about guys who become assholes when they realize they're going to be fathers and I never thought Zack would make his girl get an abortion, I just hopped he wouldn't be the type to leave her on her ass.

Zack was quiet for a long time. I looked out the window and saw Alanna talking to Layla, who had the perfect face of fear. She was even crying a bit. I bit my lip as I ran through the events. Alanna and I got a bit carried away. Layla knows about us now. Layla could possibly be pregnant.

"I'll stay by her side." Zack's voice brought me back from my thoughts. "We'll decide what we'll do together. I love her, Bri. And this isn't something I planned but she needs me. I can't believe I was scared! As long as we're together, everything will work out." His epiphany made his eyes glow, something that I saw only when he was with Layla.

Smiling, I hugged him tightly, relieved he was gonna be a man about it. "I have faith in you bro."

Alanna

"You think you could be?" I asked tentatively. The wind blew my hair gently, the air crisp and fresh.

Layla sighed, her eyes far away, her hand rested on her stomach. "I feel different like it could be possible but I can't exactly see myself as a mother." she laughed softly. I smiled for her.

"You'd be great."

It was quiet for a long time. Just the sounds of everyone laughing, unaware of what could be going on. "I need to see a doctor to be sure." Layla said quietly, I knew what was bothering her.

"Zack isn't mad Layla. He couldn't be. He's crazy about you." I nudged her gently, I saw her eyes glistening with tears. She turned her head to look at me, her hair falling around her shoulders.

"I know he is, but I also know that Will could be anywhere, rather Dimitri can be." Her tears threatened to spill, "I don't want him to hurt my baby." Her calm and detached charade cracked. I wrapped her up in a fierce hug as she sobbed onto my skin. "He won't." I murmured, my eyes darted around before bugging out. Because I spoke too soon.

If my mind wasn't slipping, Dimitri stood in the door way of a shop not 30 feet away. Nobody else had that kind of predatory smirk.

"Layla, love, do me a favor and get some rest inside. I'll be there in a minute." I kept my voice calm. She pulled away and nodded. "Bring me something to munch on?" she asked walking safely onto the bus. I nodded semi-frantically and waited until she was out of my sight before walking briskly to the shop that sold souvenirs of Washington State.

"Hello Princess." Dimitri greeted coolly, his handsome features calm and collected. I looked around to make sure no one was watching us. "Why the hell are you here?" I hissed.

He looked me up and down with his dangerous baby blues, it made my skin crawl. "Checking up on you. Will wants to know where his girls have been." he purred like the most vicious jungle cat. Dimitri shifted his weight to his other foot, allowing me to see the glint of a gun tucked into his dark jeans.

"In case you haven't noticed we don't work for him anymore." It was getting harder to breathe without gasping.

He stroked my cheek as he smiled, leaning down to whisper something in my ear. "Oh Alanna, when will you realize that we can take you whenever we want?" He pulled away, his hand still on my face. I was too shocked to recoil from his touch. He chuckled, the sound making me glare at him. "I almost didn't recognize you without your bruises." he sounded disappointed that they were gone.

I slapped him, faster than the strike of a snake, I had acted purely on impulse. There was stinging in my hand and his cheek was colored an angry red. Dimitri's head had flopped to the side with the force behind my hit but now he was staring me down, a raging storm of wrath turning his eyes nearly black.

I shrank back, terrified he would retaliate. I didn't forget the gun he carried. "I will be back. And next time.... I'll collect." he smirked then walked away to a black BMW, got in and drove away.

My heart was thumping unevenly as I slumped against the wall of the shop, tears slipping down my face. "Please...." I begged God to protect us. All of us.