Hey Stranger

Zaid’s POV
I damn near died as I watched him walk out…what the living hell. How did he know I thought that way about myself? How did he know I didn’t really enjoy being with Sierra. Somehow he’d know I wasn’t attracted to females and that I denied the fact I was more attracted boys then I’d let on.

And he’d given me his number! But I wasn’t allowed to call him unless I threw my entire life upside down…I didn’t like change and this would be a big one if I did what he said I should. I knew it was the right thing to do to stop lying to Sierra and to myself. But the problem was I was still grappling with that one question. Was I gay? Once again that damn voice decided to speak up.

“You are gay and you know it…” It said and I wanted to bang my head on the table…so instead of avoiding it I let my head drop down on the table banged my forehead against it hard three times. The head bashing didn’t help I was still confused as all hell but now the girl at the counter was totally looking at me like I was crazy…and I couldn’t argue with her I was indeed crazy. I was falling for a guy who I barely talked to…and I’d been fairly straight before I’d seen him, granted I didn’t like sleeping with my girl friend but still…and I was hearing random disembodied gay voices in my head. God what the hell was wrong with me?

“You’re denying who you are…that’s what’s wrong.” It said and I groaned. This voice was like slowly becoming my conscience only it wasn’t on my side, it was on Arden’s…that was so not fair…even the voices in my head thought he was hot. Damn it!

I sighed dramatically and got up leaving a tip on the table before I dragged my feet walking out of the shop heading towards my truck. I drove home feeling like an asshole. I was lying to everyone…I’d kissed a boy twice and I liked it…in fact I’d liked it a lot. And on top of that I was dreaming about Arden…it was only twice but still I knew as soon as I went home and crashed for the night, it was only eight and I was already exhausted, I’d be dreaming about him.

I pulled into the drive way of my house and dragged my ass into the house said hello to my Aunt Nadia and then went up to my room. I flopped down on my bed still fully dressed and passed out.

~

There were tears in Arden’s eyes as he looked at him with those amber eyes, but they weren’t the exactly shade I remembered him to have…these were slightly darker and the gold flecks at the center weren’t there. I reached out and placed a hand on his check but he reached up and pushed my hand away and I got a glimpse of his wrist, there was no scar.

“Leave me alone, Zane…I just want to be alone…Okay?” He said looking up at him. Who was Zane?

“Adem please…baby understand that I’m not in control here. She’s pregnant I can’t just turn her away.” I said kneeling on the floor in front him as he sat on the bed. I had to make him understand but seeing him like this tore at him insides and made me want to breakdown crying myself.

“How many months is she?” He spat coldly.

“Three and a half…”

He put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me hard so that I landed on my ass on the floor. “You’ve been with me for 5. It’s not fucking yours…”

He suddenly slid of the bed and curled his legs up to his chest burring his face in his knees so that I could see him as he started to sob. “P-please tell you’ve only been with me…P-lease say that you’re only mine and that Sara hasn’t gotten her claws back in you…”
Sara? Who was Sara?

“I’ve only been with you…only yours forever…” I heard my voice say and then I was wrapping my arms around him tightly and rocking him back and forth to calm him.

I started to pull him into my lap and then the next thing I knew my arms where empty and I fell to my face on the floor. I rolled on to my back looked around…what had just happened he was just here with me. Where did he go?

There was a suddenly a loud crash and I was on my feet and running out into the living room. I didn’t think for a second that I didn’t know where I was…because honestly as I stepped out into the living room my first thought was ‘What has he done to our apartment?’

Shards of glass littered the carpet, and broken picture frames were scattered everywhere along with black hardcover journals and crumpled drawings. I looked down at one of the broken frames it was a black and white photograph Arden and I laughing while holding each other…but the thing was is that it wasn’t exactly us…we looked different. Not incredibly so but there was enough difference that I would notice. Arden’s hair was shorter and there was no scar in his eyebrow and his hair didn’t curl around his ears. There where a few other differences but those stood out in my head the most.

There was another loud crash and then Arden came back into the room and dropped down in the middle of the mess, tears running down his cheeks. “Why?” He sobbed. “Why did you leave? Why did you leave me…I hate you so fucking much Zane…” He brought the blade up to his wrist and I found myself calling his name telling him I was still here that I was right here but he didn’t seem to hear me as I called out his name again.

He took a deep breath as he started carve into his skin drawing a stylized “Z” into his flesh. I felt tears well up in my eyes and had to close my eyes. I took a deep breath and when I opened then I sat in the middle of a hotel bed. I looked around the room and the first thing I noticed was a no smoking sign on the wall…the warning was written in Russian. I wanted to frown but it didn’t seem to faze me.

I looked at myself and I gasped as I lifted an incredibly sharp razor blade to my wrist and started to carve into my skin. I didn’t really see what I was carving but I went I finished I wiped the blood off on my jeans. My eyes widened slightly, there on my wrist was an “A” cut into my wrist.

~

I suddenly sat up in bed and looked around. I was back in my own bed and wrist stung so bad and immediately pulled up my hoodie sleeve expecting the cut to be ugly and fresh because it hurt so bad but it wasn’t it was scarred exactly as it had been when I’d looked at earlier. What the fuck was going on with these fucking dreams?