Second Heartbeat

I slowly brought the pasta up to my mouth. The texture of the sauce almost seemed to float on my taste buds.

I gulped.

I took a bite out of my garlic bread. The taste was just so delightfully delicious. It was the best thing ever right now.

I couldn’t help, but let out a small moan of happiness.

“It tastes that good?”

I smiled happily, and I nodded quickly.

“It is so good,” I mumbled.

I admit it, I was very ashamed of myself. I couldn’t believe that I let out a sound like that right now. Especially since Zacky was right there, watching me.

He probably thought I was crazy or something. Well, he already thought that. I mean, who wouldn’t? After what I put him through, no one would think I was sane by now.

“It’s divine,” I mumbled. Zacky smiled widely.

“I’m glad you think so. It took me a long time to find out where was a good place to buy some garlic bread,” Zacky said happily.

“You didn’t make it?” I asked. He shook his head.

“I made the spaghetti though,” he said. I nodded. The spaghetti was good too.

“Emma, can I ask you a question?” Zacky asked.

He almost sounded scared. Why would he ever be afraid of me? It’s not like I was Clem or Emily. Now they were some scary girls. Well, April was probably scarier for the guys though.

“Knock yourself out, Zacky.” I said smiling. He grinned back at me, but it soon faded. He looked so serious.

I almost wanted to quote the Joker right now. I think you all know the quote.

“So where exactly is Anna?” Zacky asked.

I felt myself freeze. I wasn’t expecting that at all. I didn’t think he, or any of the guys, would ever bring her up again.

I mean, they saw my first reaction to her being brought up. They knew I wasn’t comfortable talking about her.

“What do you mean?” I asked. Zacky shrugged.

“Is she alive? Did you give her away?” Zacky asked.

I sighed deeply.

“You know, she’s alive. I could never abort a child, Zacky. You make it, you make sure it stays alive.” I said.

“So where is she? Do you know where she went? Or did you just give her away to anyone?” Zacky asked.

I shook my head.

“No, I gave her away to someone that I knew very well. He isn’t the most trustworthy man in this world, but I know him. If I ever feel the need to see her, I can.” I said.

“And who is this man? Is it the guy that raped you?” Zacky asked.

“Heavens no!” I yelled.

I would never leave her with that sort of man, but I guess the man I left her with wasn’t any better. Well, at least I knew he didn’t rape women.

“Zacky, you met him before. I know you have. You spoke to him, you acknowledged him, and you beat the crap out of him.” I said.

Zacky tilted his head, and I had to say he looked very cute.

“But if I beat him up, why would you give him your kid? And who the hell is he?” Zacky asked. He was confused, and he was so adorable right now.

“Zacky, I gave him Anna because he was willing to be in his granddaughter’s life, where I wasn’t.” I said.

Zacky paused.

“Granddaughter,” he mouthed slowly. He nearly jumped out of his seat.

“You fucking gave Anna to your dead beat of a father!” he yelled. I shrugged, but I nodded soon after.

“Emma, that’s… that’s so stupid of you!” Zacky said. I nodded.

“I know, but he was the only one that was really willing to raise her,” I said. Zacky just looked at me shocked.

“What about your mom? What about Emily? What about me and the guys?” Zacky asked. I shrugged.

“I figured that if he was the one raising her, I wouldn’t have to see her as much. And I pretty much have only seen her three times,” I said sighing.

“How can you be so calm about this?” Zacky asked. I shrugged.

“Do you not feel any sort of attachment to her?” Zacky asked. I looked up at him, and I smiled.

“Of course, I do. I gave birth to her, didn’t I? I mean, I don’t get any sort of regular updates on her, but I told my dad if anything too bad happens to her, that he should tell me.” I said.

“Oh, that’s it, Emma?” he asked. He sounded so disappointed in me, and for once I could understand why.

Here I was sounding so stupid, so cold about something that I should be crying or at least upset about.

“Zacky, what do you want me to say?” I asked. He shrugged.

“I guess I want you to say that you want her back or something. I want you to say something that a normal mother would say.” Zacky said. I frowned.

I guess I was just some big disappointment right now, wasn’t I?

“How does she look like?” Zacky asked. I smiled softly.

“She kind of looks like me, I guess. She has my hair. You know the annoying brown curls in random places. She even got my eyes too. They’re brown” I said slowly.

“She sounds beautiful,” Zacky said sighing. “She is,” I said softly.

“Do you ever think about getting her back?” Zacky asked.

“No, not really. I mean, it would be nice one day, I guess, but I would like to married. You know, have a stable family to love her. But I would only do that, if she wanted to come home with me.” I said.

Zacky nodded.

“Zacky, why did you do all of this?” I asked.

He looked surprised, almost baffled. He was acting like he wasn’t expecting that question to pop out at all.

“What do you mean, Emma?” Zacky asked. “You know, this whole set-up, Zacky. Why did you cook for me? Why did you set everything all up?” I asked.

He smirked.

“You know, Emma, I love you. I love you a lot. I wouldn’t be here with you right now, if I didn’t. I wouldn’t have spent so much time with you, if I hated you. But I don’t hate you; I love you.”

I stared at Zacky. He seemed so concentrated right now. He was staring right at me, and I felt so nervous.

My palms felt itchy, and my heart was racing. What was happening right now? Why was this all so very nerve wrecking?

“Now if being with you, if loving you, means that I have to do anything in the whole damn world, I’ll do it. Hell, if you asked me to quit the band, I would do it. Emma, I don’t really know how to say it other than to put it bluntly, so that’s what I’m gonna do,” Zacky said.

I stared at Zacky.

What was he talking about?

“Emma, move in with me please?” Zacky asked. He was practically begging me with his green eyes.

I smiled happily.

“Of course, I will!” I said.

Zacky walked up to me, and he hugged me tightly.

“I was so afraid you would say no,” he mumbled. “You idiot,” I muttered.

There was no way in hell that I would ever be able to say no to him. I don’t think anyone could ever say to no.