Metus

My heart beat raced, despite the spreading exhaustion in my limbs. The hospital was much quieter at night, most of the patients having gone to bed. The nurse smiled at us when we entered. She was a dark, curly-haired woman with warm and caring eyes. She looked at me for a moment before asking Ashley what we needed. Ashley told her we were here to see Lor and Motioned for us to go ahead.

The hallway stared back at me, the stark whiteness of it almost blinding, I was vaguely aware of the others moving past me, but it seemed I was incapable of actually seeing them. Tom touched my shoulder, gently guiding me towards the door. He didn't have to talk for me to know he was worried, which was convenient since I didn't think I was capable of answering him.

"Be lucky you're not in Spanish." I heard Lor say. "We have to learn the capitals of all the Spanish speaking countries, and to help, we got to learn a chant!"

"How privaledged you are." Ashley chuckled.

"Aren't I? And what's better, I can't get it out of my head! All I can think of is that nasaly woman chanting: Mexico, DF, Mexico, Guatemala Guatemala, Tegucigalpa Honduras, San Salvador El Salvador, Managua Nicaragua, San Jose Costa Rica, Panama Panama, La Habana Cuba, Santo Domingo Republica Dominicana, San Juan Puerto Rico, and so on."

I heard chuckles from inside the room. It felt strange to think of Lor as just another highschool student, she was so much more to me. I honestly would cross one thousand oceans for her, But I know that it would be agony every second with her, for I knew, at some point, I would have to leave. So why start the agony now?

Tom looked at me, worry etchedinto every feature. After a moment of silence he entered the room, leaving me alone in the hallway. What am I waiting for? I thought and followed Tom.

Everyone was crowded around Lor's bed, sitting or standing. Her lip was the slightest bit swollen still, and two stiched marred them. The only evidence of the deep gashes on her neck was a fresh bandage. Other than that she looked normal. I admit it was odd seeing her without heavy eyeliner or her standar visual-kei hair. Still, she was just as imperfectly human as I'd remembered. Imperfectly perfect. My Lor.

She beamed at me. "Took you long enough." she said. I managed a smile and sat down next to Lor's Dad. The meaningless chit chat continued for a long while, but before I knew it, I was alone with Lor. I hadn't noticed anyone leave.

Lor's expression had changed. It was no longer cheery and happy, but sweet, content. Quiet.

"I'm glad you came Billa." she said, smiling. I managed a smile. "What's wrong?"

I shrugged. I couldn't meet her eyes, not when she was like this. She missed me. Why?

I felt hands on each side of my face. Lor had made me look at her. "It. Is. Not. Your. Fault." she said. Was she psycic? "If anything, it was mine--" I opened my mouth in protest, but she stopped me. "I knew something bad was going to happen, and still I did nothing. It was my--"

"Don't say that!" I shouted at her, grabbing her delicate hands. "Don't you ever say that! I was right there, if I had moved faster I could have stopped it! I...." I looked back at Lor. She was just staring straight at me, the faintest of smiled on her lips. "Why aren't you mad at me?"

She rolled her eyes, then looked at me with the same, way-too-innocent expression she had when we were first alone. "Who would want a Superman? Someone who is constantly trying to protect me? It's sweet an all, and in moderation, it would kick ass because I'm no Wonderwoman, but seriously? All that would do is make us drift further and further away from eachother. I don't want that, Billa, and neither do you."

I didn't know why, but I suddenly felt euphoric(sp?). My heart beat calmed and all I could think about was what Lor had just said. I don't want that, Billa.

"Wir mussen nur noch 1000 meere weit..."