There's Only So Much I Can Take

The door to my bedroom slammed shut to tell me someone had walked in. When I looked up my eyes were deceiving me! It wasn’t noon yet, it couldn’t have been. But there was Ronnie Radke back from the hospital, standing there with a big smirk on his face.
Ronnie ran over to me and jumped right on top of me excitedly. He got on his hands and knees so he could look down at me. Ronnie placed a kiss on my lips that was both gentle and hungry. He then proceeded to just look down at me with a stupid smile.
“Why are you so happy, goof?” I asked pushing him off by his head.
“Because I’m back at home with you!” Ronnie exclaimed as he let me push him off of me. “You have the cutest cheek bones!”
“Love you too, Ronnie.” I laughed giving him a kiss on the cheek.
“What do we have to do today?” he questioned getting off the bed and looking down at me.
I joined him on the floor not sure what we had to do today so I gave him a simple shrug.
“Okay that’s great, let’s hang out here.”
Before I could say anything, Ronnie picked me up bridal style in his arms and started kissing me. All he did was kiss me, we didn’t move from room to room like in the movies, we just stayed in the bedroom, me in Ronnie’s arms, not moving. It was perfect. Ronnie was perfect. We were perfect. Everything was perfect.
“Aw shit!” Ronnie groaned when the phone started ringing.
“Let it ring.” I moaned as Ronnie placed kisses on my neck.
“Can’t baby, it’s my manager about the tour.”
Damn, I’d forgotten about the Escape The Fate tour. I was hoping Ronnie had forgotten about it too since he had that whole drug thing going on. I couldn’t believe they were going to leave in a month. That was only thirty days to be with Ronnie. But in reality I only had twenty days with him since those were the only days he wasn’t on drugs unless he pulled another stunt with a hospital.
Ronnie was Ronnie though so it was going to be an unpredictable twenty days.
Ronnie ran over to the phone that he paid for with his money. He was the only one that actually used the home phone.
“Hello?!” he exclaimed excitedly.
I had no idea what his manager was saying on the other end but I did know whatever he said made Ronnie even more excited. He was bouncing around like crazy with the white cordless phone next to his ear the entire time. He would look at me and grin before looking away and continuing his tour conversation.
“Yeah man, perfect timing.” Ronnie nodded as his grin grew even bigger. “That would be perfect. Wait can we take the “Bill and Ted” videos to watch?!”
He was suddenly out the cordless phone in hand. That was the strangest thing in the world. Did he realize it wouldn’t work after a couple feet? It was Ronnie probably not.
“Aw shit!” Ronnie burst back into the room looking at me with wide eyes. “Did you know the phone didn’t work when you got to the end of the hallway?!” he exclaimed.
I rolled my eyes. This was typical Ronnie. He didn’t want an answer, he just wanted to talk. “Do cell phones do this? Oh my God, why do people have phones if you can’t even go that far when you’re talking? The phone just quit on me while I was talking to my manager and Max. Katie, with this new information in my head, I now refuse to get that new Sidekick. My Sidekick is broken and I will live without it.” Ronnie looked at me as if he had said something profound.
“Ronnie, wipe that expression off your face.” I snapped.
“Whatever, I’m gonna go get high.”
I pulled him back. “You’re going to call your manager.”
Ronnie glared at me but did as requested. Ronnie called back his manager and at eight p.m. they were finally done talking. They weren’t really talking about where they were going; they were talking about what they would have on the bus.
“Now it’s too late to get high.” Ronnie growled playfully.
I pushed his head away from me. “Maybe it’s a sign you should stop getting high.”
“If I had a horse he would bite your head off!” Ronnie looked at the ceiling for a second before he looked back at me again. “He will be stoked when he gets to eat you.”
“You’re so mean to me.” I kissed his lips.
“Maybe it’s because I love you so much.” Ronnie kissed me back.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back. This always happened when Ronnie told me he loved me. I loved it so much because he hardly said it. It was so wonderful to hear those three small words. I couldn’t help but kiss him back; it was just so heart wrenching to hear that.
“C’mon baby, let’s go to sleep because I have band practice early.” Ronnie pushed me lightly to get me off.
“I’m gonna stay up a little longer.” I replied.
“No Katherine, come to bed with me.” Ronnie begged.
After about twenty minutes I came with Ronnie. There was just something about him that let him always get his way with me. He was just so Ronnie Radke.
“Katie, forgive me for anything I do in the near future.” Ronnie whispered.
“Yeah okay Ronnie.” I replied not thinking anything of it but instead just going straight to sleep.
The two of us fell asleep quickly. Ronnie had me in his arms tightly whispering every few seconds in his sleep that I had to promise to stay by his side. There was no way I understood him though since most of the time he just talks nonsense.
When I woke up he was still whispering that though. It was weird because Ronnie doesn’t ever talk in his sleep. Either he has a guilty conscience or he is about to have one. I would have to wait to find out.

“Morning Ronnie.” I smiled at him when he walked out already dressed in black jeans and a black Iron Maiden shirt. “Could we maybe talk?”
“No I’m going to go get drugged. I won’t get caught this time!” he pulled open the door and left.
“Gnarly.” I muttered angrily. What had happened to wonderful band practice? I had been counting on that to keep Ronnie out of danger. Now he was going to get high anyway. Max Green was responsible for this.
I picked up my phone and dialed Max’s number.
“What?”
“What happened to band practice, Green?” I growled angrily.
“We had to cancel on account of Bryan hurt his arm muscle. We’ll be practicing next week again.”
“Why can’t you just have Ronnie practice?!” I begged ready to cry.
“He’s going to get high, huh?” Max knew Ronnie and me so well sometimes it seemed like we had a four way going on here with Max.
“Yeah.” I sighed.
“Well you can come over here. Robert was going to come over too anyway. We were going to go bowling.”
“Sweet, I’ll leave Ronnie a note and be right over.” I nodded in agreement.
Quickly, I scribbled down some information for Ronnie to know. On the fridge, I put up a little note card that had my cell phone number, Max’s cell phone number, Max’s home number, Omar’s cell number, Omar’s home number, and the number for 911. If anything happened to Ronnie he would pick the correct number to call for any kind of emergency.
I hopped in my Jaguar since Ronnie had taken the Honda. I sped through the streets to get to Max’s house.
Robert’s Toyota was in the driveway already next to Max’s dirty green van that the band used to use. The lights were on so they were both obviously inside. I parked my car and walked up to the door.
After one ring of the bell and one knock of the door, Max was bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet hyperactively. “Hey Katie!” he exclaimed excitedly.
“Hey Max, why are you so excited?” I laughed coming inside his house.
“Bowling! I haven’t been there in a while!” Max exclaimed grinning.
“Should you really leave Ronnie at home alone when he’s just going to get high?” Robert asked walking in the room.
“No, he’s going out to get high. Ronnie knows the rules, I gave him some phone numbers, all in all, Radke should be okay.”
Robert shrugged to show he didn’t really care since he didn’t live there. Max just stared at me amazed that I actually trusted Ronnie to be alone in the apartment. The way those two thought, they automatically went to the idea he would burn down our apartment building.
There was no doubt in my mind that he would come close, but Ronnie was a pretty good hardcore addict to stop it or at least know which number to call. Hopefully he would call the right number; sometimes he got 911 and Omar’s cell number mixed up.
Without another word, the three of us piled into my car eagerly. Whenever I had my car around they never wanted to use anyone else’s car. The thing that bothered was that Max had this weird obsession with me actually driving my car. He always felt as if he should drive my car.
“Give me the car keys, I’m driving!” Max declared from the passenger seat he had beat Robert up for.
“Maxwell it happens to be my car, I am driving.”
“No, you can’t drive this car, I need to.” Max continued.
“Ugh fine, whatever.” I handed Max my keys in annoyance. We then changed seats, and Max started driving like ninety-five miles per hour out of his neighbor and down the twenty miles it took to get to the paintball place.
It was astounding he didn’t get stopped for drunk driving or speeding. Max parallel parked horribly in front of a small pretty little town house. He was half in the street and half on the curb, and way too close to the silver van in front of him. I had no idea how he would get out but he would find a way.
The three of us walked inside the bowling alley. Max paid for us three and took the shoes for us which he ended up thrusting harshly into Robert and my hands.
We immediately started bowling, grins and giggles flowing on our faces. It was nice to do something outside of my house again. Being with Max and Robert reminded me of Ronnie and my life before the drugs. It had been wonderful!
There was a depression that I could feel slowly taking over my body. I didn’t want to admit it, but I needed a therapist to talk this out with. With the Ronnie load on my shoulder and finding a job and trying to run away from Ronnie’s problems, it was just all too much. There was only so much I can take and it was getting close.
Bowling with Max and Robert made me realize this. It just reminded me of everything Ronnie and I didn’t do.
As I lifted up my ball to roll it down the lane, a figure stood in front of me.
“What the hell?!” Max yelled getting up.
Robert and I got up too and joined him to find out who this unaware figure was. We walked up as far as we could.
“Ronnie?”
His eyes were wild and his hair was messier than usual. His body was pale and he looked scared, wild, and angry all at the same time. Something told me he’d done something that had to do with drugs. Why else would he work hard to find me here?
“We have a problem.” Ronnie told me in a voice just lower than a whisper.
“What is that, Mr. Radke?” I asked shaking from the fear of what he was going to say.
“We have no money in our bank account.” Ronnie told me.
And then I blacked out.