Animal I Have Become

I kept teasing him for the next couple of days - not that I liked him or anything. I made sure I didn't cross a personal boundary. I was still very much in love with Jacob.

At the same time, though, I felt something deep inside me begin to change. For better or for worse - that I do not know.

We'd exchange blood - but I made another personal boundary to that. I wasn't going to live off human's blood; even if it was Damon's.

So while he was out hunting, I made sure I'd sneak out of the house to hunt for animals. I didn't know if Damon knew about it. Even if he did, he's acting is pretty good.

But as the days passed on by, I kept thinking about my family. And questions would run through my mind.

Questions like how they are doing without me; or did they miss me like I miss them. And then my mind went to the last fight between Damon and Jacob. Was Jacob okay?

I decided that asking myself those questions is useless unless I could convince Damon to let me see them.

It was a long shot - but I had to try.

I walked down the stairs to see Damon sitting by the couch, just staring into space. The wood that I was walking on creaked and he looked up at me.

His frown turned into a small smile as he stood up and walked over to me.

"Not here to tease me again, are you?" Damon asked as he nibbled my ear.

"I want to ask you for a favor," I muttered, not returning his tease.

He stopped nibbling my ears and looked at me in the eyes. I may not realize it, but he was a few inches taller than me. Slowly, he let go of my arms and tilted his head to the side.

"I want to visit my family," I stated, loud and clear.

A moment passed us and he kept staring. My heart was pounding against my chest - afraid of what his reaction would be.

So far, I've seen him become angry - though he claimed that I haven't seen his anger yet.

"Of course," Damon nodded his head and walked towards the window to look outside. "Just don't go looking for the dog. I'll know if you went to see him."

There was a threat in his voice when he said that. But I didn't care. I was allowed to go see Daddy and the others.

As I walked up the door, I could hear Alice running over to me with wide arms. She gave me a huge hug - a hug that I needed so dearly.

I looked up to see that Daddy, Jasper, Carlisle and Esme were right behind her. I quickly smiled at them and as soon as Alice let go of me, I ran towards Daddy and gave him a hug.

"How'd you manage to come out here?" Daddy asked, pulling me into the house and everyone followed.

"Long story," I quickly answered.

I wasn't going to tell my family that I was drinking part human blood - they would be ashamed of me.

"Forget about that," Alice interrupted as we took a seat on the couch. "What matters is she's here with us now."

"How's Jacob doing?" I quickly asked and I prayed that he was doing well.

But the whole family lapsed into silence. I looked up at them, as I tried to control my face reactions. I didn't like the looks on their faces.

"He's fine," Daddy said but Alice waved him off.

"He's not talking to anyone, Nessie - and he refuses to eat. He wants you back," Alice answered solemnly.

I felt my heart tear into little fragments when I heard about his condition. At that point, I swore to myself to go look for him after this. It didn't matter what Damon was going to do to me. If Damon tries to attack Jacob again, I'll be there to protect the latter.

"Have you been eating, Nessie?" Esme asked and I felt five pairs of eyes looking at me with scrutiny.

"Of course I have," I faked a smile and tried to think of nothing - in case Daddy was reading my mind.

I imagined myself drinking a deer's blood, hoping that Daddy would believe the images I was sending him.

"You look different, Nessie," Carlisle added and for a second, my human heart stopped.

"It's the hair," I faked a laugh and played with my hair playfully.

I had almost forgotten that Carlisle might have notice the changes in me. Maybe it's my eyes - though that seems unlikely because my eyes do not go red or such when I drank from Damon. I have to thank that on my human side of my body.

"Did he hurt you?" Daddy asked, his jaw tightened in anger.

"No," I lied.

"Ness -"

"Where's Emmett and Rosalie?" I changed the subject.

"They're fine."

"They went out."

Both Daddy and Alice said at the same time before looking at each other. At that moment, I knew they were hiding something from me.

"Okay," I played along and stood up. "I have to go now."

Everyone looked at me but Daddy was the first to stand, give me a hug and walked upstairs.

"It's hard for him to say goodbye, Nessie. Can't you stay for a day or two?" Esme whispered before giving me a hug.

"I don't think I can - but I promise to visit as much as I can," I said, hoping that I could keep my promise.

"We miss you, Nessie," Alice said and gave me another hug.

I turned to look at Jasper, who's face was emotionless before they broke into a small smile.

"Do visit often," he said.

"Here, I'll walk you out," Carlisle offered as we walked out of the door.

Once we were far away from the house, Carlisle turned to me.

"We're going to find a way to get rid of him, Nessie," he said and I looked at him in surprise. "Once he's gone, we can be a family again."

"But he's stronger than any of us and the Volterra refuse to come," I replied staring at my feet.

"We'll find a way, Nessie. Don't you worry about a thing," Carlisle looked at me before adding, "And please try not to drink any more of his blood."

I looked up at him again in surprise.

"How'd you k -"

"Alice had a vision. We tried to block out the image when Edward's around - you know how furious he'd get if he found out," he explained.

Tears were starting to form in my eyes and I gave Carlisle a hug. I missed how the family would pamper me alot.

"Take good care of yourself, Nessie," Carlisle said and I walked off.

It was time to visit Jacob.