I Had It All

-Kelsey’s Point Of View-

I buried my head between my knees as I sat up against the wall, squeezing my eyes shut and covering my ears with my hands. Hot tears were rolling down my cheeks, but I tried as hard as I could to ignore them, and to ignore the thundering footsteps throughout the house, coming down the stairs.

“Kelsey, where the fuck are you?!” he screamed, his voice echoing throughout the house. I whimpered and squeezed my eyes shut even more, knowing that he’d find me soon enough, but if I couldn’t see him, maybe, as silly as it was, he wouldn’t see me. I felt like an innocent child in a war-torn home, parent against parent, unable to do anything but try to block it out.

I felt the floor rumble beneath me, a sure sign he was growing nearer. I made the fatal mistake of opening my eyes, and the first thing I saw was a pair of hands reaching out for me. His mouth opened to say something, his eyes softened; those eyes, those brown eyes… They didn’t belong to Ian… They belonged to…

“Ian!” I screamed, feeling my body begin to shake violently, shutting my eyes. “Stop! Stop! Go away!”

“Kelsey, shhh, wake up. Wake up,” I heard, the soft voice waking me up. “It’s me, Alex. You’re safe. Shhh.” His arms wrapped around my shoulders, holding me close until I stopped shaking and until my tears subsided. He was bent over the bed, standing next to me, with his chin on my shoulder.

When I finally regained control of myself, he let go, and sat next to me. “You were having a nightmare, I think,” he stated quietly.

I just nodded, feeling thoroughly embarrassed. I’d basically dragged him all the way back to Cleveland just for him to catch me acting like a complete fool, acting out a nightmare. What made matters worse was that the last time I saw him, I’d admitted everything to him, and he’d screamed at me, telling me he hated me, and left. Obviously, this was about as awkward as it could get.

And this is where the silence set in. The strange, unnerving, incredibly awkward silence. “So…” he started, scratching the back of his neck.

“I’m so sorry,” I replied honestly, finally meeting his eyes.

Alex just shook his head, dismissing it. “So, what’s the diagnosis?”

“Three broken ribs, a broken arm, and a minor concussion.”

He shook his head again in disbelief, looking in the other direction. “How long are you going to be in the hospital?”

“I’m not sure, but I’m thinking another two or three days, probably.”

He nodded, staring at the wall, as if in thought. “I’ll stay.”

“What?” There was no way I’d heard that correctly. Why would he want to spend time with me anymore ever?

“I’ll stay here. Or rent a hotel room nearby or something.”

“What about the tour?”

“I can miss three days. Only two of them have a show booked, and they can have Matt fill in on vocals or something. I’ll call them later; they’ll understand.”

“Alex, you really don’t have to do this all for me. Not after everything…”

Alex cracked a small smile, but it vanished in seconds. “You’ve got me wrapped around your finger. No matter what’s happened, there isn’t much I wouldn’t do for you.” I blushed, not knowing how to respond. He didn’t say it in a sweet, romantic manor, meant to sweep me off my feet; he said it as if it were fact, his eyes glued to the wall, almost ashamed. But I couldn’t blame him.

“Wanna climb up?” I asked after a short pause, gesturing with my unharmed right arm to the large empty space on the bed.

He nodded, lifting his legs over the chrome bars and situated himself next to me under the white sheets. Neither of us knew what to say or do, so we pretended to focus our attention to the television, leaving a few empty inches between us.

Minutes later, the nurse walked in, smirking at us. “I’m not blind; I know you’re not really her step-brother, dear, but I’m going to have to ask that if you are planning on staying here overnight, you have to sleep in one of the recliners. With her ribs in bandages, we’ll want her to have the bed to herself.”

Alex smiled and sent her an affirming nod, watching her walk out of the room. We sat in the hospital-provided bed, silently watching the television attached to the wall, and as I looked over at Alex’s intent gaze to the screen, I realized how right the nurse had been earlier; this really was what safety felt like.