Status: Read Blog
Asylum
To Be Normal Again
Frank’s POV
I couldn’t tell you why I stay, why for the first time I listen to my heart and not my damn head. I turn around and look at him. I didn’t know what to say I was lost for words; I had no idea why we kept doing this.
“ There has to be something wrong with me, I don’t just tell random strangers how I feel or be this close to them, this isn’t right, I said while looking at him.
“ And you think this feels right to me?. I haven’t talk to anyone since I got here, I hardly even talk to the doctors, I only met you three days ago and here I am telling you why I’m here. Believe me I know there’s something wrong. “ He replied.
Every part of me wanted to believe him, my mind was screaming at me to just walk away. My heart was begging me to stay just to see what would happen, that he was telling the truth. I couldn’t choose who to listen too, I just wanted to run to my room and feel safe again.
“ No you don’t understand okay, this has never happen to me. I never talk to strangers not even once; I can’t even look at them. I’ve been here for so long and not once have I talk to anyone, and yet here I am talking to you, something is beyond wrong, “ I said while looking at him.
“ I know Frank believe me I know. This is just as wrong to me as it is to you I know how you feel. I don’t know what to think either, I don’t know if I should be happy or if I should just to my room so I could feel safe again, “ He replied.
“ Then what do we do then? Because I’m fucking lost here, “ I said in anger. I was angry at myself I shouldn’t be standing here telling some stranger how I felt.
“ We should just go on in our lives, just act like we don’t know each other. Go back to the way things were before we met each other, it’s better that way, “ He said while getting down from the wall and walking back inside.
I just watch him walk away my heart was screaming at me to say something, to make him turn around to just come back, but I just stood there. This was for the best I didn’t need him in my life, I was way better off without him. I’m not suppose to have someone in my life, it just suppose to be me. I tried to act as if I was happy with this but deep down I wasn’t, I wanted him back here. But I had to let that feeling go, I had to act normal again, even though I don’t know what normal is. This was going to be hard to do.
** Two Days Later **
Its been two days since I last saw Gerard, I could lie and say I like it; that this whole thing was great but I would be lying. I hated this this wasn’t me; I wasn’t suppose to be wanting someone, to talk to someone. I should have never let this happen I should have never talk to him but some how I did anyway. I haven’t left my room in two days I was afraid if I did leave I would see Gerard again, I had to make myself believe this was for the better even when I didn’t wont too.
I couldn’t tell you why I stay, why for the first time I listen to my heart and not my damn head. I turn around and look at him. I didn’t know what to say I was lost for words; I had no idea why we kept doing this.
“ There has to be something wrong with me, I don’t just tell random strangers how I feel or be this close to them, this isn’t right, I said while looking at him.
“ And you think this feels right to me?. I haven’t talk to anyone since I got here, I hardly even talk to the doctors, I only met you three days ago and here I am telling you why I’m here. Believe me I know there’s something wrong. “ He replied.
Every part of me wanted to believe him, my mind was screaming at me to just walk away. My heart was begging me to stay just to see what would happen, that he was telling the truth. I couldn’t choose who to listen too, I just wanted to run to my room and feel safe again.
“ No you don’t understand okay, this has never happen to me. I never talk to strangers not even once; I can’t even look at them. I’ve been here for so long and not once have I talk to anyone, and yet here I am talking to you, something is beyond wrong, “ I said while looking at him.
“ I know Frank believe me I know. This is just as wrong to me as it is to you I know how you feel. I don’t know what to think either, I don’t know if I should be happy or if I should just to my room so I could feel safe again, “ He replied.
“ Then what do we do then? Because I’m fucking lost here, “ I said in anger. I was angry at myself I shouldn’t be standing here telling some stranger how I felt.
“ We should just go on in our lives, just act like we don’t know each other. Go back to the way things were before we met each other, it’s better that way, “ He said while getting down from the wall and walking back inside.
I just watch him walk away my heart was screaming at me to say something, to make him turn around to just come back, but I just stood there. This was for the best I didn’t need him in my life, I was way better off without him. I’m not suppose to have someone in my life, it just suppose to be me. I tried to act as if I was happy with this but deep down I wasn’t, I wanted him back here. But I had to let that feeling go, I had to act normal again, even though I don’t know what normal is. This was going to be hard to do.
** Two Days Later **
Its been two days since I last saw Gerard, I could lie and say I like it; that this whole thing was great but I would be lying. I hated this this wasn’t me; I wasn’t suppose to be wanting someone, to talk to someone. I should have never let this happen I should have never talk to him but some how I did anyway. I haven’t left my room in two days I was afraid if I did leave I would see Gerard again, I had to make myself believe this was for the better even when I didn’t wont too.
♠ ♠ ♠
Comments??