Make This Perfect Again

We had played in Trail, and it was a great crowd. So far, everything had been going great. Like I predicted, Jazz was more excited to see me than Matt. Once everyone had finished up and we were talking to everyone that was at the show,which had fizzled down to a fair few, Jazz had ninja-glomp-hugged me.

"OH! JAWS! I MISSED YOU!" Jazz yelled, kind of scaring the girls I was talking to. I tried to get out of Jazz's grip, but it was useless.

"LET ME GO!" I said, trying to get away. The girls had laughed and left me and Jazz alone. Jazz had finally let me go.

"You were so good! Your voice has matured so much!" Jazz squealed happily. "Airin looks the same, how ever...Marque grew, and Keith is still Keith!" Jazz said. She locked me in another hug. "Oh, it's so great to see you again!"

"And what about me?" I heard Matt say from behind me. Jazz let go of me and ran up to Matt, basically knocking him over.

"Oh, I'm happy to see you too." Jazz said with not much enthusiasm.

"Well jeez! Have a spazzed out hello with your best friend, but not your boyfriend!" Matt pouted slightly.

"Aww, don't worry baby, I missed you." Jazz stood up on her toes and kissed Matt. I had never gotten over how akwardly cute Jazz and Matt where as a couple.

"Ew! Matt and Jazz are kissing!" I heard Marque squeal. I turned around to see him clinging onto my brother like a 5 year-old would when the 5 year old saw something scary. Jazz turned around to face Marque aswell.

"You've done worse with Airin!" Jazz retorted back.

"Who told you?" Airin exclaimed. Jazz made a sour face at Airin.

"I don't want to know about it!" She whined. I started laughing. It was good to be around all of my friends again. Jazz then turned to me. "So what's it like being the only girl on tour?"

"Well, you know...it's SO great being around all these guys again, but honestly...They're all a pain in my ass." I laughed slightly. Just then, an arm was draped around my shoulders.

"Does that include me?" Josh asked me.

"You're the biggest pain of them all!" I said. Josh put on a mock-hurt face.

"That's mean!" He said. I smirked at him.

"But it's true." A few of the others laughed. Josh kind of smiled at me.

"Hey, Josline, wanna go for a little walk with me before we have to leave?" I nodded a little bit.

"Hey, Josh. You be careful with my sister!" Airin said, taking Marque's hand in his and tugging him along.

"What have I ever...wait, don't answer that." Josh awkwardly laughed. He pulled me along and we walked out of the building. The September air was a bit chill. Josh noticed my shiver and took off his sweater, wrapping it around me.
We walked down the street a little ways before he spoke to me. "So, how is everything? With the tour I mean."

"Oh...just great. I'm really liking seeing you guys again." I said, wrapping my arms around myself. We were silent for a little bit longer. It wasn't an awkward silence, but it was still strange.

"So...how have you been? We haven't seen eachother in 4 years...I kind of expect something exciting to of happened." Josh asked me.

"Well...there have been a few things...but nothing too exciting...and you know about John..." I said.

"Come on, something exciting has to of happened." Josh pressed on.

"Well...My parents got married, if that counts." Josh smiled at me.

"That's great."

"Yeah, it happened a few days after we got our record deal." I explained. Another silence fell over the two of us. We had circled back around to the front door. "We should probably go help clean up now..." I said, going to push the door open.

"Josline, wait." Josh put his hand on my shoulder. I turned my head to look over my shoulder. "There was a reason I wanted to take a walk with you." I turned around completely and faced Josh. I was completely in awe of his wonderous blue eyes. It had been too long since I had actually looked into them. I felt my legs start to tremble. It looked like he really did have something meaningful to say to me.

"What is it Josh?" My voice slightly cracked.

"This has been bothering me since I saw you in Edmonton. I..." He stopped himself, like he wasn't sure what to say. I just stood there, feeling a little awkward while I waited for him to find his words. He placed both hands on my shoulders and looked me straight in the eyes. "I'm sorry."

"For...for what?"

"For..everything I had to put you through. For lying to you,for making you have to take medication, for fucking up your relationship with John..." I had to stop him.

"Whoa, hold up there Ramsay. Who said you fucked up my relationship with John? That relationship was bound to die out sometime, and better now than later." I said, smiling.

"But if I never came back into the picture..." I placed one of my hands over Josh's mouth.

"John could NEVER replace what we had. Even if we had a very dramatic ending to our relationship, there is always going to be a special place for you in my heart Josh." I let my hand drop from Josh's mouth. He smiled at me and pulled me into a hug.

"Thank you, Josline." He whispered. I hugged him a little tighter. It was so good to be back in Josh's arms. It felt like I belonged there.

"And thank you for talking with me. I appreciate it. I'm sorry too." I said.

"What are you sorry for?" Josh moved away from me a little.

"For ignoring you." Josh lopsidedly smiled. Oh, how I loved that smile.

"Eh, I expected you to be pissed off at me." Josh laughed a little. Then, the door to the Charles Bailey Theatre opened.

"Hey, Josh, you need to come help us." Ian said, "We can't move everything by ourseleves!" Josh nodded and turned back to me.

"You coming?" He held out his hand.

"I'll be a few minutes." I said. Josh smiled and I handed him back his sweater. He went back into the theatre. My hand dove into my back pocket and pulled out a squished package of smokes. I took out my lighter and took a ciggarette out of the packet. I looked at the ciggarette, the package of ciggarettes, and then the lighter. I put the lighter back into my pocket and I put the ciggarette back in the pack. I thre the package on the ground and turned around and went back into the theatre. I didn't need to smoke any more. I had something better.

Josh's forgiveness.