Burning Desires

After Matt and I went our separate ways I was sitting on the hotel room bed, I couldn't stop feeling so numb on the inside knowing what I'd done was just almost too much to bare. I rested my head in my hands, then pushed my hair back as I heard the hotel bedroom door open. When I looked up I saw Brian with a sweet smile on his face and a bouquet of favorite flowers. He handed them to me and I smiled then kissed him softly.

"Thanks..."I whispered as I looked up at him,I sighed a little pushing what happened with Matt to the back of my mind.

"Whats wrong?"He asked cupping my face in his hands lovingly.

"Its nothing."I said softly, and kissed him on the lips as I ran my hands down his biceps I looked up into his eyes and I could see the burning look, he wanted me and I knew I couldn't exactly say no after what I'd done with Matt. He brought his lips down to mine and I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him closer to me. The kiss was hot, I'd have to admit I did have strong feelings for Brian. I could love him one day, but right now...I wanted nothing more than for that day...to be now.

The next morning I was curled up in Brian's side feeling more guilty than the night before. I kissed his chest and traced the tattoo outlines on his arms. He had amazing tattoos I could look at the forever and still be amazed. I sit up holding the sheet to my chest when Zacky walks in.

"Oh...wow."He said and Brian sits up making a face at him then smirking a little.

"I'll be right back."Brian said standing holding the comforter around his waist and going into the bathroom

"So...it was 'the' night last night, huh?"He said, he had a look on his face that I didn't like something about how he was looking at me made me nervous.

"I've never seen him this way with a girl before if you hurt him, I'll make sure you hurt for the rest of your life."He said seriously as he looked at me, his green eyes piercing my very soul.

"I-I- what do you mean?"I asked him confused, I felt my heart beating in my chest fast it was like nothing I'd ever have felt before.

"I know what you and Matt did last night...and the fact that you slept with Brian right after....sickens me."He said to me lowly a serious look on his face. My face went pale just as the bathroom door opened.

"Jade? You okay?"Brian said in concerned tone, we walked over to me shoving Zacky out of the way and cupping my face in his hands. "Baby...."He said and my eyes moved from Zacky to Brian.

"What?"I said softly to him as tears threatened to spill over.

"Baby, whats wrong?"He asked me softly, I jumped when I heard the bedroom door open then slam shut as Zacky made his exit. I buried my face in his neck and cried, it hadn't been that long since I'd cried but with everything that was going on...it felt right.

He didn't ask anything he just pulled me into his lap and held me as I cried, once I had calmed down a little and he rubbed my back soothingly. "What did he say?"He asked me.

"What? Who?"I said softly, he brushed some stray tears out of my face.

"Zacky...what'd he say..."He asked me again this time his face was serious.

"Oh..uhm its nothing to worry about."I whispered to him, it was almost so soft he wouldn't have heard me.

"Don't lie...what'd he say..."He asked this time his face contorting into one of anger as he set me on the bed and stood. I'd never really seen him angry, maybe mad a few times but other than that not really...angry...especially at me.

"Its really nothing...I over reacted."I said to him lightly and he rubbed his face then walked over to his clothes which were strewn across the room.

"Brian..."I whispered but he didn't say anything back to me, he pulled his clothes on and I felt my begin to pound.

"If you wont tell me then Zacky will."He said with a serious look on his face.

"Brian...it was nothing please don't..."I said to him and he looked at me then shook his head before walking out of the room slamming the door behind him. I quickly got up and pulled on some clean clothes. I pulled my hair back into a messy bun, I was going to find him. I ran down the hall I saw him already talking to Zacky and I cursed. I leaned against the wall, I was just gonna let him yell at me...then leave me. I deserved it, he could have so much more...

"Dude, shes just a big baby."Zacky laughed a bit. "It was the best friend threat...I think I scared her."He said and my heart rate began to slow.

"So thats it?"He asked him and Zacky nodded a bit.

"Thanks man...but don't scare her like that again."He said seriously and they man hugged each other

Brian saw me sitting on the floor in the hall, I had slid down the wall while I had leaned on it. "Come on."He said offering me his hand. I took it and he stood me up, "Why were you so scared? You shouldn't have to be worried about if you're doing nothing wrong..."He said to me and I sighed a little.

"I know..."I whispered.

"Are you?"He asked me softly as he rested his head on top of mine.

"N-no..."I said quietly not wanting him to hear the hesitance.

"Good...because Jade..."He said lifting my chin up so I was looking into his eyes.

"I love you."He said to me and I felt tears sting my eyes.

"I...I .."

"don't say if you're not ready but... I do love you...and you can when you're ready there is no rush."He smiled a little and kissed me softly. "Well I have to go do something, I'll see you later today?"He asked me and I nodded. He turned and walked down the hall with Zacky, I sighed a little then walked down the hall to Matt s room. I looked to make sure Brian was out of sight. I knocked on the door softly, he opened the door with just a towel on, water was dripping down his body and I turned to look away.

"Oh..Jade...whats wrong?"He said softly ad he ran a hand through his hair his deep voice rumbling out of his mouth.

"We need to talk..."I said to him softly and he nodded a little.

"I think so too."He said softly moving so I could walk inside. I saw his clothes on his bed.

"Are you going to change?" I asked him.

"Oh, right, be right back," he said as he took his clothes and went to the bathroom.

I sat down on the edge of his bed as I waited for him. He came out in less than three minutes fully dressed.

He walked out and I felt his eyes on me, so I looked up at him.

"Zacky knows."We both said in unison and I let out a small laugh.

"I see you got a visit too?"He said to me and I nodded a little.

"Brian is suspicious"I said lightly and he sighed a little then pushed his fingers through his short hair.

"So...what now? We slept together once...its not like it would happen again..."Matt said and I sighed, he was right, no matter how much I wanted it too the truth was there. He had Val and I have Brian. We couldn't keep fooling around like this.

"No we can't let it happen again...He told me..."I whispered.

"What?"Matt asked looking up at me.

"He told me he loved me...like ten minutes ago. Do you have any idea how… dirty I felt?" I said and covered my face with hands because of the shame running through me. “I… slept with Brian last night.”

I really didn't want to tell him, but it was best if the WHOLE truth was out there.

“You… what?” his voice was almost small.

I didn’t move my hands from my face. Matt crouched down in front of me and removed my hands to look at me in the eyes.

They were watery.

“He came to the hotel room with flowers and this… radiant smile on his face, and all I could feel was guilt, Matt!” I whispered harshly. “I felt like after what you and I did… that I owed him or something.”

“You owe him nothing!” Matt stood up straight. “We made love, Jade! I love you!”

I gasped, but it wasn’t because of those words it because someone slammed the door open. Brian charged at Matt.