Burning Desires

Guilt and shame was what Matt should be feeling, but he felt neither. His heart burned for her since he met her, and when he had her, he had been the happiest man on earth. Was he the smartest? Maybe not, but he knew that Jade was special to him.

Matt woke up alone in bed. There was a loud knocking.

With his slight hangover, the sound only intensified and made him cringe in pain. He threw the covers aside and walked over to his hotel door.

“What?” Matt answered as he opened the door.

There stood Zacky with a frown on his face.

“Let me in,” he ordered.

Matt raised an eyebrow, but still opened the rest of the door to let him in.

“What’s wrong man?” Matt asked.

“You’re a fucking moron! You and Jade in the bus?!”

Matt’s heart sank. “Let me--”

“Let you what? Explain?! She’s the girlfriend of your best friend and you have a fiancée! You should be fucking ashamed.”

“I am!” He lied. He didn’t regret his night with Jade, but it had been wrong.

“You need to sort your shit out, man!”

“I will!”

“You and Jade should start by telling Brian the truth.”

“Are you mad? He’ll fucking kill me!”

“He has every right! You fucked his girl!”

“It wasn’t planned! We were both a bit buzzed!”

“You know she’s the first girl he has let in since… ever! This is going to break him, but you need to tell him!”

Matt nodded like a little kid being scolded by his mother.

Zacky sighed. “Thank your lucky stars that I don’t just go straight to Brian and let him know what I saw. Maybe next time you should get a fucking room.”

Zacky walked out of his hotel room.

Matt felt like hitting wall, but he restrained himself.

Why did there had to be consequences? Why couldn’t it have just been kept a secret? A wonderful, wonderful secret?

He would’ve rather lived with it for the rest of his life than see the hurt in his friend’s eyes.

He thought a shower would help.

He went to the bathroom and stripped down his clothes.

When he stepped inside of the shower and turned on the water to warm, he thought about Jade. He closed his eyes and remembered every single detail. The way she moaned his name, and how her eyes closed when she was close and bit her lower lip when she tried not to scream.

It had been all and more than he had hoped for.

He walked out of the shower ten minutes later with a towel wrapped around his waist.

He searched through his bag for something to wear. He found his boxers, jeans, and a clean Guns N’ Roses shirt.

There was a knock on his door again. He walked over to it and opened it.

Jade stood there looking very beautiful. Her eyes scanned him, a blush appeared on her cheeks, and then she turned away.

“Oh, Jade, what’s wrong?” he asked her when he noticed the worry in her eyes.

“We need to talk,” she said, her voice soft.

He nodded. “I think so too,” he opened the rest of the door to let her in. She walked in.

He threw the door to close it, only it didn’t close, but he didn’t know about that. He just followed Jade deeper into the hotel room.

She saw the clothes on his bed. “Are you going to change?”

“Oh, right, yeah, be right back,” he got his clothes and to the bathroom and changed there.

He walked out of the bathroom all dressed.

She was on the edge of his bed sitting down, her hands on her lap, and her face told her she was worried sick.

He hated seeing her like that. She looked so… defeated. He liked seeing the upbeat Jade, but she was only like that around Brian. Whenever he was around her, there was always a sad, longing look in her. Brian made her happy, truly happy. The sad truth hurt him, badly.

“Zacky knows,” they both said at the same time.

They both chuckled at that.

“I see you got a visit too?” he asked her as he sat next to her.

She nodded.

“Brian is suspicious,” she whispered.

He sighed and ran a hand through his short hair. He really wished Zacky would’ve kept his mouth shut.

“So… what now? We slept together once… it’s not like it would happen again,” Matt said, but he had hoped that she would reject the thought, but her pause told him otherwise.

“No, we can’t let it happen again. He… told me…” she trailed off, but Matt had a pretty good idea, still he needed reassurance.

“What?”

“He told me he loved me, like ten minutes ago! Do you have any idea how… dirty I felt?” she covered her face with her hands. “I… slept with Brian last night.”

Matt’s blood boiled with pure anger. She slept with him after they did? It took a lot of Matt not to yell at her, but he was mad.

“You… what?” he didn’t even recognize his own voice.

She didn’t move her hands from her face. Matt crouched down in front of her and removed her hands to look at her in the eyes.

They were watery.

“He came to the hotel room with flowers and this… radiant smile on his face, and all I could feel was guilt, Matt!” she whispered harshly. “I felt like after what you and I did… that I owed him or something.”

“You owe him nothing!” Matt stood up straight. “We made love, Jade! I love you!”

She gasped, but it wasn’t because of those words it because someone slammed the door open. Brian charged at Matt with such hatred that it actually scared Matt.

Before Matt could process it, he was on the floor with Brian on top of him. His eyes had a fiery hatred in them.

His fist collided with his face several times. Jade’s pleas was heard, but not fulfilled. Brian was blinded by rage and jealousy, mostly rage. He wanted to rip Matt to shreds.

“I fucking asked you if you had feelings for her!” he said almost breathless. “I fucking asked you! You straight up lied to my fucking face!”

Matt finally caught one of Brian’s fist and then the other. Now it was a power struggle. Matt was of course stronger, but Brian was fueled by adrenaline and strong emotions.

“Brian! Stop!” Jade cried out.

Matt pushed Brian off of him.

He wiped off the blood from his bottom lip. Brian was going to go for a right hook, but Matt blocked it with his left arm, and used his right to hit Brian. Brian was thrown back.

Matt stood up from the floor and Brian did too. Jade stood in the middle now. Her hands wide to stop them.

“Enough!”

“You’re both pieces of shit!” Brian spat at them. He turned his attention to Jade. “And you… you’re just a fucking whore.”

Hurt immediately went through her eyes.

“Take that back you fucker!” Matt growled and moved to punch him, but Jade stopped him.

“I gave you my heart and this is what you do? Sleep with my best friend?! I knew you had feelings for him, but I thought… you felt something towards me.”

“I do!” she immediately said. “It’s… complicated, Brian.”

Brian chuckled bitterly. “It really isn’t. Either you want me or him, so choose, Jade because you’re making a big fucking mess.”

Brian gave one last glare to Matt and walked out of the hotel room.

Matt looked at Jade. She looked so hurt.

“He’s right,” she whispered.

“You’re not a whore, Jade,” Matt said as he took her hands.

She took them back. “Not about that--but I am because who the hell sleeps with her boyfriend’s friend?--I meant about me making a big mess. I… I can’t be here. I’m just ruining your friendship with him.”

“He’ll get over it.”

She shook her head. “I need to leave.”

“To think? All right, I’ll see you at sound check?”

“No, Matt… I mean leave. I can’t stay here.”

“What? No… you can’t! Tour just started!”

She chuckled, but with no humor. “I’m sure I can be easily replaced.”

Matt shook his head.

She nodded her head.

“It’s better this way. I’m just… a huge mess. I’m like a fucking hurricane!” She too stormed out of his hotel room and probably from his life.