I Was Never Touched, Until I Met You...

When I woke up Katherine was standing above my silently crying and whispering words that sounded like prayers. She hasn’t done that since she came out in her first year of college. The room was spinning and I didn’t know where I was. I looked around the found that I was in my room in my bed. I looked up and saw my canopy. I took in a deep shuddering breath and bared the pain as I lifted my hand to her head and patted her head.

“Its ok love, I’m ok, I’m fine.” My voice came out as a shuddering whisper but she heard me and whipped her eyes.

Her Curtin of long black hair was tangled and disheveled hiding her face form my eyes. I attempted to move her hair but she pushed it back to the front of her face. She started to slowly shake her head from side to side and little whimpers were escaping her mouth as she tried to hold them back.

“What’s wrong is something wrong with me.”

She shook her head.

“Are you and your family ok?”

She nodded.

“Then what’s th-” before I could finish my sentence she lifted a shaking hand and pointed her finger at the other side of my bed.

As I turned my head, I was shocked and saw wires and blood being transferred from Mathew’s arm his face looked pale and he was not moving. I followed the twisting curve of the wires filled with blood and where they were leading.

I flowed the twist and turn and was shocked to find that they were connected to my arm.

Frantically I looked back towards Kat my voice was back and I sounded stronger this time. “Please disconnect the wires. I’m fine now please,” I broke off into a sob and from the corner of my eye watched as Katherine launched herself from her spot to disconnect the wires. Once she was done she excused herself from the room and let me have some alone time with him.

I wrapped my body into his side when I heard a chuckle that her brought fear into my life since I turned 12. The voice was deep, commanding, and sent waves of terror down my spine.

“How are you Jewels?” his smile was evil and as disgusting as his personality. “Have you let him have that nice ass of yours recently? Or have you sucked his cock again?” I backed up to my head board and brought my knees to my chest shacking with fear. “Do you remember that time about seven years ago? I do, I remember you, a little sick fuck, losing your virginity to a man at the tender age of eleven.” He was crawling on his knees towards me now.

“W-why c-ca-can’t you ju-just leave me alone!” I stuttered and screamed. He smiled and stopped just inches from my face. He let a roar of laughter and threw his head beck then he looked at me with a wild smile and wide eyes.

“Because you’re just so fucking fun, and you,” he pointed at me, “and him,” he pointed to Mathew, “belong to me.” He giggled and moved off the bed. “Remember Jewels you can’t hide from me, and neither can he.” Then just as he had done many times before he became transparent and then disappeared.

I crawled towards Mathew’s pale body, hugged his arm, and began to cry.

After a few minutes, I felt a hand on my head. My eyes widened as I looked up and saw that it was Mathew, and he had a small smile on his face. He looked at me and took a deep breath I could feel relief spreading through his body.

"Thank god you’re ok." His voice was raspy and strained. My eyes filled with tears that I quickly wiped off with the back of my hand.

I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. "I'm the one who should be saying that dummy. I thought you were gonna die." My voice was filled with tears. "If you ever almost die again I swear I'm going to kill you." We both giggled. “And plus, you still have to prove that you love me like how I love you." Without thinking twice, I raised himself from his arm and kissed him softly on the lips. I guess he was too shocked to do nothing but then I sat up and smiled down at him. Moreover, he smiled back at me.

"Thank you." He pulled me into him with a hug.

For a moment, I felt his body tense so I looked into his eyes searching for what was wrong but I couldn’t find anything so I asked him instead. “What’s wrong?”

He looked me in the eye and covered something before I could reach in and hugged me again I felt his tears side from his eyes and fall to my shoulder. “I’m sorry I got you mixed up with me, I’m sorry I juts, couldn’t’ stop myself.” He started to sob.

I was confused but I knew this wasn’t the right time to ask questions so all I could do was hold him and whisper how much I loved him and how everything was going to be ok.

If only I knew how to make everything ok, how to get rid of Jeff, how to remove the age difference, the sexual ‘stigmas’ that society has placed on us, and the problems that haunted both of our completely fucked up minds. Life is filled with ‘If only’-s, and even if the whole world was stacked up against us there is one thing I know will stay the same …

I will never succumb.